Mio amore(My Love)
by thecarouselneverstopsturning
Summary: {SET IN S1) It's always good to cherish these moments. Chandler and Monica are engaged and having a baby - him loving the fact that he will be a father soon, Ross chasing after Rachel, Joey and Phoebe working on their careers. Everybody lives happily ever after with each other. C&M, R&R J&P. Ongoing. Enjoy :)
1. Prologue

**I know that I have no business starting another story but I just thought of this while watching 'TOW all the babies' with my sister. The sun is bright and shining in our eyes.**

 _ **SUMMARY: Set during S1 except that C &M have been engaged for two years and expecting their first baby(they don't know the gender yet). Ross still hasn't confessed his feelings to Rachel but he will soon(MUHAHA, J&R and R&P fans though I like those couples too but it's Lobsters forever. LOL). It's around june where Monica is six and a half months. They all still have their 80's hair from S1 though. Ha.**_

 **{Central Perk where Mon enters N Rachel is behind the counter}**

Monica is wearing a dress that makes the bump practially stick out and she's always complaining how fat she is. But Chandler and everybody convince her otherwise, "I'm so tired of being pregnant" she moans. "Hey honey why don't you sit down here" Chandler suggests gettting up from the armchair, Mon starts to look angrily at him saying "Oh like you haven't done enough". And starts to scream "GET OUT GET OUT NOW" revealing to everybody in the coffee house that she is one uncomfortable pregnant woman. "Let's get up" Ross replies aroused by his pregnant sister's anger at his best friend for putting her in a postion like this, "Yeah" everybody else agrees leaving C&M alone on the orange couch. "I'm really sorry I've been treating you like this for the past few months" Monica admits, "Oh Mon it's okay. That's what pregnant women do. Love" Chandler answers and starts to rub her belly grinning as all soon to-be fathers do. He also kisses the palm of her hand saying to the baby "Baby please don't kick Mommy so hard. We love you", getting reward with a little kick. "That's my baby" Chandler grins as the baby kicking makes Monica's stomach jump up and down, "It wanted it's daddy" Mon smiles. "We will be great parents" he answers and starts to kiss her not knowing everybody in the coffee house is staring at them. Causing a "Eww guys" reaction from Ross, "Aww they love each other so much" Rachel answers.

 **{That night where Monica met her mother for dinner}**

 **"** Hi sweetheart. How are you and the baby" Judy asks placing a hand on her daughter's baby bump, "We are fine. Thanks Mom" Monica answers. When they are seated and drinking, Judy spoke saying "I just hope you know how proud me and your father are that you and Chandler are having a baby" and continues "I remember the day you first walked. It was very hot that day and you? - You walked to me saying 'Mama mama'. And when you and Ross were both newborns, oh my god your dad couldn't stop looking at you two. I love your father very much and we hope you and Chandler will have such a blissful marriage. But wait I have something for you". Judy fishes through her bag pulling out a yellow baby blanket(UNISEX blanket) that is in excellent quality, "This is from me and your father. The baby's gender is not known yet and the shower is coming up but we decided to give this earlier. It used to be yours as a toddler" she says, "Oh Mom how can I thank you enough for giving me this gorgeous blanket" Monica replies and adds "Stupid pregnancy hormones" as a tear drips . "Oh my girl. I know how hormones can be - When I was pregnant with you & Ross, whenever your father would look at me. I would burst into tears" Judy hugs her daughter holding her close.

 _TBC..._

 ** _Well now it's around six and dark out. Family's coming back in a few and my friend Brianna is too. More will be up in an hour or so 'Kay kay? :)_**


	2. Tesoro mio

**{Let's say that Monica found out she and Chandler were going to be parents during Rachel's first few days with the gang. Now she and Ross are spilling out each other's secrets during their parents visit in 1x02}**

 _ **"Ross used to wear your makeup everyday Mom!" Monica shouts, "Oh yeah well Chandler got Monica pregnant" Ross shot back happy he revealed their secret. Monica puts her hands up to her face in horror and Chandler looks pretty horrified too, the Gellers ask "Yes?". "Yeah you heard me. Chandler knocked up your little Harmonica" Ross tells his parents. "Is this true Monica" Judy questions her daughter, "Yes it's true. Me and Chandler are gonna be parents in five months" Mon explains. "Yay! I'm gonna be a grandpa" Jack exclaims, C &M then start to kiss in front of everybody. "Eww guys please stop kissing in front of us" Ross begs and his mother says "Aww they love each other so much".**_

 ** _{A month later. Monica is experiencing a bad case of morning sickness}_**

 ** _Monica says "No no" and throws up, Chandler comes in holding her hair. "Honey what's wrong" he asks, "It's the baby. I keep hurling" she explains and he then cupps her face replying. "Baby just wanted it's mommy and daddy. Especially it s mommy who is so gorgeous"._**

 ** _{Flashback when Rachel first joins the group. That aafternoon}_**

 ** _"I really think I have the bug that Daddy once had before and at work too" Monica says, "You should take a test you know just to make sure" Rachel who is now wearing regular clothes suggests. Five minutes later Mon comes out of the bathroom, Rachel who is reading a magazine asks "Well what happened". "It's positive. Me and Chandler are gonna have a baby!" Monica announces, "Oh honey that's great" Rachel hugs her._**

 **Night night :)**


	3. Mi mancano i tuoi occhi

_**This chapter is my verison of 1x7(or whatever the eppy right before the thanksgiving one is). Except that Monica is six and a half months now. And it is not definite if Carol is having Ross' child, we'll see. LOL! Oh yes it's around Thanksgiving time. Omg one more thing about the timeline..**_

 ** _1\. Disregard the fact I said that it was june in chapter one_**

 ** _2\. It's the end of november_**

 ** _3\. C &M's baby was concieved in may_**

 ** _4\. C &M have been engaged for quite a long time_**

 ** _5\. Set during season one_**

 _{Monica is having lunch with her mom}_

"So did you and Chandler get to find out the baby's gender yet" Judy questions her daughter, "No the last time we went the baby's legs were closed because he scared it so next time" Monica shakes her head. "Wha- how'd he scare it. I've never imagined him to be a baby scarer before" Judy asks, "Well he almosts always talks to it so the last time he decided to talk to it in front of the doctor. He said somethings that scared it off" Monica explains. "I'm really sorry Sweetheart" Judy hugs her, "I love Chandler but sometimes he can do extremely dumb things" Mon says. "Your father can be the same way but I love him" Judy admits and pays for the bill then helps her daughter up. Given that Monica is six and a half months pregnant she can't do much.

{ _At the apartment}_

"Hey Babe" Chandler greets his fiancee with a kiss then asks "How's Baby Bing right now", "Baby Bing's fine. Kicking me a lot but it's good" Monica answers and he puts his hands on her waist but carefully not to hurt the baby. Then romanticallly kisses her causing an "Eww guys" reaction from Ross, "Aww look they love each other so much" Rachel replies. "But hey it's already bad enough that Chandler got Monica pregnant. They don't need to express their love in front of us" Ross states and continues watching TV. "Remember we've got that appointment tomorrow" Mon questions her fiance, "Oh yes. I can't wait to find out Baby Bing's gender. If it's a girl I want it to look like you and the boy to look like me" Chandler answers pulling his fiancee in for a more heated kiss. "Hi Baby Bing. I'm so sorry I scared you last time. Daddy's a little crazy" he says to the baby, "Baby Bing keeps kicking me. It loves it's Daddy" Monica smiles. "It loves it's gorgeous Mommy too" Chandler replies at the fact that he and Mon will be parents soon.

{C&M are at the doctors to find out the baby's gender}

"My favorite patients. Mr. Bing and Ms. Geller" the doctor smiles, and asks "Do you two want to learn the baby's gender today" while looking under Monica's hospital gown. C&M both nod, and before they know it the baby is on a black screen floating around on the right. "Well your baby is very healthy. It's a girl" the doctor annouces, "Aww Baby Bing's a girl" Chandler says and kisses Mon.

{That evening. The gang know the baby is a girl now}

"But god the baby looks like Star Trek" Ross examines the sonogram pic, but then thinks for a sec and adds "No a better word to describe her is that she looks like she's gonna attack the Enterpise". "Just think that me and Monica made the baby" Chandler grins.

TBC...

 **I got my phone taken away last night and I started writing this on the bus ride to school but obviously ran out of time. Well anyways more will be up in a few, 'Kay kay? :)**


	4. Dove sei stato per tutta la mia vita?

**So we got a huge TV for the living room with everything like Netflix and YouTube. And now me and Pop are watching the first ever eppy of Friends where Rachel is on the phone with her dad, LoL!**

 ** _{Flashback in 1x7 where Jack and Monica were discussing coffins for Nana}_**

 ** _"I want you to know how proud me and your mother are of you that you and Chandler will be parents soon" Jack says, Monica smiles and adds "I know that Dad". "And we can't wait until Baby Bing is here soon too. We can't wait to be grandparents" Jack continues, "I hope the baby is a girl" Mon admits. "I know you do Sweetheart. Your mother wanted all boys and I wanted all girls but we got one of each. Maybe you and Chandler will get the same" Jack hugs his daughter._**

 ** _{The Geller home after the funeral where a speech is getting ready to be made}_**

 ** _"We can't express how proud we are of the fact that we raised two extremely smart kids. Our son just got left by his wife who is a lesbian(Jack says the lesbian part and everybody laughs) and his college ex-roomate and our daughter are having a baby soon. Can't wait until Baby Bing comes into the world soon"(Judy says the Baby Bing part) Meanwhile Chandler was kissing Monica's neck in front of everybody, "How's our Baby Bing right now" he asks. " Baby Bing's fine. It loved the speech it's grandparents gave to it. Keeps on kicking me like crazy" she answers, "Hi Baby Bing. Did you like that speech your mommy's parents gave that mentioned you" Chandler akss the baby, "I just felt huge kick. It loves it" Mon replies and he starts to kiss her neck more causing Ross who is still on painkillers to react exclaiming "Eww guys"._**

 ** _{The Gellers are at the hospital. Ross and Monica run back in after Nana scared them}_**

 ** _"Oh oh my god" Monica says clutching her stomach, the Gellers are concerned about their pregant daughter so they ask "What happened". "Offically for the record. Nana's come back from the dead" Ross answers trying to came his sister down._**

 ** _{Back to present day. It's Thanksgiving day where everybody is in the apartment and dinner is getting cooked}_**

"Hi Honey and Baby Bing" Chandler greets his fiancee placing a hand on her stomach, "Hey sweetie, I have your thanksgiving dinner - grilled cheese, funyuns and manhattan style french onion soup(I just made that soup up)" Monica answers and takes out his dinner. Phoebe is adding peas and mushrooms to the mashed potatoes while Ross is beating it to with a wisk, "What are you two doing'" she questions them. "This is the way my mom would make her potatoes like this" Phoebe adds, and Ross continues for her saying "And our parents would make it lumpy". "Okay fine then two kinds of potatoes. Anybody else want another type" Mon asks starting to cry a bit but blaming it on hormones, Chandler wraps his arms around her saying "Babe you don't have to cook all that food. It's too much for you and Baby Bing". "I want to though" Monica tells him, "I want tater tots" Joey calls out entering in from the balcony. 20 minutes later Rachel comes in from the balcony calling out "Underdog is outside!", "Wha- really" everybody questions and runs outside but poor Mon has to waddle.

 _ **{An hour enters the apartment complex and they enter but get a surprise...}**_

They open the door but Mon stays back, the other five open the door to see black smoke. "Oh my god this is bad. Monica can't come in here because she and Baby Bing will get hurt despite her still being in Mon" Chandler states, "Tell her to go back to our apartment" Joey says. "I think I found a fire extinguisher in the wall" Ross points to it", "Yeah I heard that almost seven month pregnant woman getting caught in smoke is really bad for her and the baby" Phoebe answers.

 ** _{A few minutes later the apartment is completely cleared of smoke}_**

C&M walk back out of the guys apartment as he is kissing her neck. When they get back into the apartment, Monica looks in the oven and says "Everything's burnt, we-we have no food". Rachel notices the other food and answers "No we still have the other food". Fifteen minutes later we see the gang eating Chandler's thanksgiving dinner, he starts to say "This has been best end of the year. Because Ross dude if you never brought me to your house - which was so nice of you, I would have never met Monica and got engaged to her. Then Mon I Iove you and Baby Girl so much, I think she will be as gorgeous as you but with my eyes" Chandler continues, "I love you so much too Chandler" Monica answers. "Thanks to a horrible Christmas" the gang clank their glasses together and add "To a crappy new years".

TBC...

 **I'm in bed supposed to be sleeping but instead I'm watching 2x14 and listening to 'Baby it's cold outside' on my phone while writing this - LOL. Well anyways more will be up in a few 'Kay kay? XD :)**


	5. Senza di te la mia vita non ha senso

**I hate 1x10 so I decided to skip to 'TOW Mrs. Bing'. LOL. Rachel is dating Paolo and Monica is seven months pregnant. This chapter is now set in January of 1995. XD.**

 _{The gang are all sitting down watching the Jay Leno show when Nora comes on screen}_

"Oh god my mom is on screen now" Chandler gasps with his hand on Monica's belly grinning like all soon to be fathers, "I think your mom is awesome" Rachel answers. "Oh really? Like when you are in third grade and kids are passing around page 76 of 'Mistress Bitch' Chandler questions her, "Tell us about your family life" Jay says. "Well I have a son named Chandler. He is engaged to a darling woman named Monica. They are having their first baby in two months - can't wait to meet Baby Bing soon" Nora annouces on screen with a smile on her face, "Well that's great. Now tell us more, is he more of a Mommy's boy or a Daddy's boy" Jay asks crossing his arms. "Well his father moved to Vegas when he was 10 in '78. And never really got to hang out with him but look at me, the mother I am so young and always partying raised a son this good all by myself" Nora explains doing air quotes. "You look great. Say you can give me your number and we go out" Jay suggests, Nora giggles. "Did my mother say on national TV that she is going out with Jay Leno" Chandler asks, Joey nods "I think she did". "Tell me more about you" Jay says back on TV, "Well whenever I'm inimate with a man...I suddenly get a craving for kung pao chicken" Nora answers. "Oh my god that's too much fucking information" Chandler screams at the TV, "Dude calm down' Ross replies softly.

 _{The night the gang(+Paolo and C &M's unborn baby girl), are going out for dinner with Nora}_

"Aww" Monica coos at her large belly as she is putting on earrings, "Honey what's wrong" Chandler asks as he kisses her neck. "Nothing I'm just so happy we are having Baby Girl Bing soon" she expains, and he starts to kiss her very passionately.(FYI, Mon still lives with Rachel and he still lives with Joey).

 _{At the restaurant}_

"My oh my Monica. You look really big, what's the baby's gender" Nora questions her soon to-be daughter in-law. "That's what Dad said last week" Chandler jokes and adds "We are having a girl", "Yay baby Girl Bing. We need some more girls in the Bing family" Nora chuckles as Chandler starts to kiss Monica's neck. Causing Ross to exclaim "Eww guys", "You got my sister pregnant and you are kissing her neck in front of us right now. Gross Dude" he continues drunkenly, "That Ross guy is dreamy" Nora points to drunk Ross. "Mom aren't you supposed to go on a date with Jay Leno" Chandler asks, Nora nods and questions "But a woman can't have fun can she". "That's a great line' Phoebe claps, "That's so true Mrs. Bing - you are great" Rachel replies.

 _TBC.._

 ** _I could have made this longer but I didn't feel like it. Next chapter will be up in a few 'Kay kay? LO-LO :)_**


	6. Ti adoro

**Made an error. Monica is eighth months not seven months**

At the restaurant, Ross came back from the bathroom to see Nora sitting on a chair biting her nails. "Hi" he greets her in a very miserable way, "Come here(he sits next to her)". What happened" she asks stroking his cheek. "Rachel is dating the weeny from Tereny. I love her, doesn't she get it" Ross questions annoyed, "Well I think you are a very nice and good looking man. You'll get her" Nora assures him and cupps his face kissing him. He actually starts to pull down the sraps of her dress - they were away from everybody until someone abruptly enters and looks in horror, it was Joey who saw them fool around and ran back to the table in mortification.

 _{Joey was questioning Ross}_

"Dude why the girls hell did you kiss Mrs. Bing" Joey asks, "Well we were talking about love & Paolo and then started to kiss" Ross explains. "That's still bad. Oh my Chandler will kick your ass so hard" Joey's eyes lighten up, "Hey he got my sister pregnant. That's worser" Ross drunkenly states. "But the point is you can't grope your Friends mothers - sisters and maybe a hot aunt are okay but no mothers" Joey crosses his arms. Then they come back to the table to see Chandler kissing Monica's neck and Phoebe making a tower of food.

 _{The next morning. Chandler enters the apartment after talking on the phone with his mother}_

"Dude I just got off the phone with my mom. Said you kissed her and groped her" he tells Ross, "Wha- Ross you really kissed my soon to-be mother in law. That's that super weird" a heavily pregnant Monica who is making breakfeast questions her brother as Chandler comes over to her and kisses her neck. "Ugh I didn't kiss your mother Chandler. I know better then that" Ross denies, "Yeah you did. Joey told me. He saw you two" Chandler answers, and Mon says "Oh I just felt a huge kick". "Hi Baby Girl, are you hurting Mommy. Please don't hurt her" Chandler calmy asks the baby. "She loves her daddy so much" Monica smiles.

 _{A few minutes later where Chandler and Nora can be heard arguing in the guy's apartment}_

"Mom how could you" Chandler questions his mother angrily, "How could I what" Nora responds bitting her nails. "Kiss my best Ross. You don't know how much shit I had to put up with you and Dad" Chandler answers, "I'm so sorry about me and your father. How about I say in a hotel for a few months so when Monica has the baby, I can meet my first grandchid/granddaughter right away" Nora suggests. "Fine" Chandler sighs.

 _{That evening. Monica's bedroom}_

Chandler climbs in right next to her and they sleep with their bodies touching each other. He lays a hand on her belly getting rewarded with a kick, "Hi Baby Girl Bing, Daddy loves you so much and Mommy does too. We can't wait until you come into the world soon. You will be so loved by us all, Grandma Nora is even staying in a hotel near us for you Baby Girl.", "I love you" Mon responds. "I love you too Babe and Baby Girl too" Chandler answers and they start to kiss in a heated fashion as he starts to pull down her pj pants.

 _TBC..._

 ** _This is specially for you foxstarkiller. Next chapter will be of 1x12. And what chapter should Monica have the baby? Thx, LOL :)_**


	7. Passerotto mio(My little bird)

**My version of 1x12. Two weeks later.**

Monica who looks huge for being about nine months(she is still wearing the same outfits as in the show), is making lasagnas for Aunt Syl right now. Chandler enters saying "Hey Babe and Baby Girl", "Hi honey" she replies and he starts to kiss her unaware that Ross is in the apartment too exclaims "Eww guys". "What are you making Babe" Chandler questions his fiancee, "Lasagnas for Aunt Syl" Mon answers as she pours homemade tomato sauce into the pot and chop onions. "How many does she want you to make. Love" Chandler asks, "Twelve" Monica replies and he puts his hand on her belly. "Are you sure this is good for you and Baby Girl" he asks cupping her face, "Yes we are fine". she answers and goes back to making the lasgna "Aww you will be such a great father and husband to her and the baby when you two get married soon" Rachel gushes. Joey enters from the bathroom and exclaims. "Lasanga!" and starts to pick at one of the finished dishes, Chandler slaps his hand away "No sorry Dude. My pregnant fiancee just bushed her ass off making this - and this is for her and Ross' aunt" he explains. "Get out of my kitchen!" Monica screams in annoyance as Phoebe starts to eat a raw onion and Joey tries to eat one of the finished lasangas, "Hi Baby Girl. Mommy's crazy right" Chandler bends down to Monica and asks the Baby. "I'm not crazy Baby Girl. Daddy's the crazy one" Mon insists the baby, "Well I think we all are crazy here. Insisting to the Baby that isn't born yet, which one of us is" Ross states going back to the TV. "Oh my god for the last time, get out of my fucking kitchen" Monica yells as a tear drops and adding "Stupid pregnancy hormones", "Fine" Joey and Phoebe sigh and go on the balcony. Rachel goes into the kitchen to get coffee, "You too? Get the hell out of my fucking kitchen" Monica berates her. "I'm sorry Mon" Rachel apoligizies, Mon then goes back to making the food when Chandler wraps his arms around her kissing her neck and places a hand on her bump. "Eeeww guys" Ross exclaims in octave mode grossed out, "You two are like the perfect fairytale couple" Phoebe answers.

 _{A few days later where Phoebe runs into the coffee house frantically. Rachel isn't in presence right now }_

"Oh my god" Phoebe groans and sits down, 'What happened' everybody asks. "Well as I was giving Paolo a massage - he kinda hit on me" Phoebe explains, "How are you gonna tell Rachel" Joey questions. "Dear god please tell her" Ross begs.

 _{Later on where Rachel is yelling at Paolo}_

"Get out bitch" Rachel screams, 'But Mi manchi" Paolo begs. "No Mi manchi me. Just get out" Rachel tells him, "Goodbye Rachel" Paolo sighs and grabs his stuff leaving.

 _{That evening where Monica is on the phone with Aunt Syl(wearing the same dress as in the show)}_

"Well meat's only every third layer - maybe you can scrap" Monica argues and continues "You could have told me vegatarion lasganas, now I have a dozen meat lasganas. What am I gonna do with it all" Joey says "I'm on it and starts to eat the lasganas where Ross joins him. "Listen Aunt Syl I'm not a caterer" Mon is still arguing with her aunt and adds "I'm pregnant, almost due - didn't my parents tell you? Nice langauage Aunt Syl, you kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?" she questions and hangs up in annoyance. She then feels Chandler kiss her neck saying "Mio amore, sei la mia vita. Senza di te la mia vita non ha senso", Monica asks "You know Italian. How?". "I learnt all the love words from someone" Chandler explains and continues "Dove sei stato per tutta la mia vita?. Sei la ragione per cui vivo, per cui ogni giorno sorrido", "Sei la mia anima gemella" Monica answers at her fiance's very sweet words and he starts to kiss her passionatley.

 _TBC..._

 ** _Got the Italian love words from a website so you'll all see more and more love words in Italian as the story goes by. LOL :)_**


	8. Grazie amore per sapermi amare

**My version of 1x13. A few days later. Monica and Rachel's apartment. Nobody except Ross is there, until he gets a surprise...**

Ross was sipping a coke but then heard someone scream "AGH". He looks up to see Rachel only in a towel in horror, "What the fuck are you doing" she questions. "I'm sorry, Rach. I didn't know you were in there" Ross tries to explain then walks away.

 _{Flashback of 1x6 when the gang are watching Joey's act of 'Freud!'. Afterwards}_

 ** _"So did you guys like it" Joey asks, "I must say Joe it was quite um...interesting" Rachel responded. "Did you and the baby like it Mon" Joey questions his pregnant friend, "If you say Baby Bing kicking me in the ribs like crazy - Well then yes" Monica answers looking at the playboy "Hi Baby Bing. Are you hurting Mommy. If so please don't, we love you so much" Chandler asks the baby. "Aww I love you two as a couple" Phoebe says._**

 _{Back to present day. That evening where the gang are sitting down}_

"Well I think you should make Ross show you his you know what" Chandler suggests jokily, "Eeeww no way" Ross answers and adds "Hey dude you knocked up my sister so shut up". Phoebe enters with a guy and says "Everybody this is Roger" Roger greets the gang and goes to over to Monica who has her head on Chandler's chest and he has his arms around her. Roger exclaims "My god Phoebe. Your friend is so fat" eyeing Monica's bump, "Oh shut up you idiot" Chandler tells him angrily. "I found out my father is having an affair. WAH" Joey cries, "Nobody cares" Roger states.

 _{The guys apartment where they get a knock on the door}_

"I'll get that" Joey runs to the door, and opens it to see a short woman with reddish- brown hair and heavy makeup. "Hello is Joey Sr. here right now" this woman asks, "No i'm his son. How may I help you" Joey questions. "Oh I'm Ronnie Rapalono. The woman your father is having an affair with" the woman answers and at the same time Joey Sr. enters. "What are you doing here. I said I'd meet you here". Them everything gets explained, "That's it. I want you two with us tonight and no buts" Joey Jr. says. "Well I'm gonna go across the hall so I can be with Monica and Baby Girl this evening" Chandler answers and goes across the hall.

 _{Monica's bedroom where it's dark in the room and Chandler enters}_

"Ti amero' per tutta la mia vita **"** Monica can hear Chandler say that and he starts to move his fingers on her pj pants slowly fumbling with the buttons. The lamp gets turned on, "Mon you wanna do this? Did the doctor say it was okay for us to do it up until your water breaks soon" Chandler questions his soon to-be wife and mother of his unborn baby girl. Monica nods as she can feel him pull down her shirt. "Please help me stand" she begs and he agrees taking her hands into his and pulls down her pants and takes off her undergarments but careful enough not to hurt her and the baby.

 _{The next morning}_

"Where is Ross" Rachel asks, "He said he is talking a shower at our apartment right now" Chandler answers and starts to kiss Monica's neck.

 _{Rachel enters the guys apartment}_

"Hey Mr. Trib" Rachel waves and says "Ross Geller. It is time to see yo thing(in a westerny accent), then enters the bathroom to see Joey. "What the hell are you doing" he asks mortifed".

 _{I decided to skip Joey's talks with his parents. In regards that already happened. XD. He's all alone in the girl's apartment}_

"Rachel Greene: Next stop Rachel on the peepee express" Joey smirks and opens the shower door. "Ahh Joey" he hears Phoebe scream.

{That evening where Roger is there too. Ross and Monica are eating cookies}

"Well I gotta go now. Remember Mon, you need to lay off the sweets. They made you pretty fat and are not love" Roger says looking at Monica's huge baby bump, Phoebe and Roger then leave. The Geller siblings then throw cookies at him, "I hate that little fuck. He insulted Baby Girl, didn't you see Chandler" Monica cries in distress. "Yah I saw Babe, I love you and Baby Girl so much'" Chandler answers.

{The next morning where Phoebe enters the guys apartment.}

"Your turn Tribbiani" she hums and opens the shower door but then see's his dad in here instead of the real Joey. "Hello dear" Big Joey says.

 _ **Night night :)**_


	9. Hai dato un senso alla mia vita

**This is my version of 1x14. It's the day before Valentines. M &R's apartment where Ross enters.**

"Guys guys!" Ross says beaming, "What's up" everybody questions. "I've booked a reservation at the fancy restaurant. For all of us tomorrow evening" Ross explains, "I love that place" Monica answers. The gang look at her "Well I've got friends" she states, and adds "Chandler tell Baby Girl Bing to stop kicking me like crazy and to stop jostling my ribs and insides". "Hi Baby Girl are you hurting Mommy. Pretty please don't - she's kept you in there for about nine months" Chandler asks the baby, 'I love that place. Remember when we would ditch school during lunch time to go there" Rachel asks. "And that's why they tell you to stay in school" Chandler jokes, "Yay I can ask Lorraine to be my date" Joey answers dreamy. "Wow Joey falling for a girl" Phoebe laughs sarcastically - she's actually devolping a little crush on him.

 **XOXO~The next evening where Monica is getting ready~XOXO**

"Aww my Baby Girl Bing" Monica coos, but then looks in the mirror and see her huge belly. "I'm so fat" she wails while putting on earrings, "Honey don't say that. You are almost nine months pregnant with our baby girl. Not fat" Chandler tells her and kisses her moving his lips down to her belly. "I just felt a huge kick when you kissed my belly" she annouces, "Baby Girl. I love you and Mommy so much and we can't wait until you come into the world soon" he says to the baby. "Mon Cherie" Monica says, "Cara Mia" Chandler answers cupping her face and kisses her. "Hurry up people we are gonna be late" they can hear Ross call out, "You have to make it up to me tonight Geller" Chandler smirks thinking of the romantic plans he has for her that evening. "That will be Geller-Bing to you in a few months" Mon corrects him as he takes her hand pulling her up and out the apartment door. "Oh dear god Carol said she and Susan are coming to the resturant too" Ross groans at the mention of his pregnant ex-wife and her life partner.

 **XOXO~At the restaurant where everybody sits down~XOXO**

"Wow Monica you look really big. When is you and Chandler's due" Carol asks eyeing her pregnant ex sister in-law, "Thanks. You look big too, ours is due at the end of the month to the beginning of march" Monica smiles as her fiance takes off her coat and sliding her chair out so she can sit down. When they are all seated Chandler starts to kiss Monica's neck causing Ross to exclaim 'Eww guys". Rachel then saw a very familar face, "Paolo! What are you doing here?" she exclaims and questions. "Well I got set as your blind date" Paolo explained.

 **XOXOXO~At the Girls apartment where nobody is there and Monica enters~ XOXOXO**

She waddles to the bedroom to see Chandler on the bed with a rose in his mouth and in a tuxedo. There are roses covering the right side also, he takes her hands and says "Mon I love you and Baby Girl so much. I want us three to live happily when she's born very shortly - so I'm asking if we can live together in this apartment. Us, Rachel for a little while and Baby Girl", "Are you kidding Chandler? Of course I wanna live with you!" Monica answers and then he starts to unzip her dress throwing it across the room. And she kicks off her highheels and he takes off all her clothes.

TBC..

 ** _Stay tuned for more :^) XD_**


	10. Sei la mia stella polare

**I was going to do my version of 1×15 but then decided on something else. Enjoy! XD**

Monica sighed as she read out of a magazine; it was her day off and dear god they were going to let a nine month pregnant woman back in. Everybody was doing their own things and the baby was playing kicky bag inside of her so she picked up the phone and called Central Perk. Sure enough Rachel answered "Hello this is Rachel Greene. How may I help you?", "Rach can you and Phoebe go out with me? Chandler called saying he won't be back for another hour and Ross is at the museum" Monica asks. "Sure just you and Baby Girl Bing stay there and we'll meet you at the apartment" Rachel hangs up.

[A few minutes later. Rachel and Phoebe arrive at the apartment]

"Girls...um can you two help me get off the couch? I'm stuck" Monica asks wincing in pain. Phoebe turns to Rachel saying "Which one of us is gonna help lift the nine month pregnant woman off the couch", "I don't know. Both of us" Rachel does air quotes. Then they lift Mon off the couch.

[The Girls are in Times square trying to decide what to eat]

"I want kung pao chicken dipped in whipped cream with a cherry on top" Monica whines rubbing her large belly, Rachel crinks her nose in disgust but then laughs saying "You know Chandler will kill you when he hears your weird craving choices". "No now me and Baby Girl Bing want Applebees" Monica cries like a little girl, "Ugh Mon you know I can't eat meat" Phoebe states. "Oh please. The baby needs it" Monica whines some more, "I'll just have a salad or fries then" Pheebs gave in.

[After the restaurant. The girls are roaming around some more in Times square]

"Here's a cute little Baby store called 'Peekaboo'" Phoebe says and they walk into there - the store is mostly girly but some boyish in the back. While they are looking for baby clothes Rachel holds up a fuscia colored baby dinosaur that rattles. "Oh Mon look at this" she exclaims, Monica is just about to say it's cute but then screams "Oww! Damn". Rachel says "You just had to say you didn't like it", "Noo not that I'm experiencing braxton hicks" Monica explains.

[At the hosptial where the girls just left the examining room where Chandler rushes in]

"Mon Mon! Are you and Baby Girl Bing okay? " Chandler runs over to his fiancee and puts his hand on her bump, "Yes honey we are just fine" Monica smiles. The doctor comes out and says "Yes Ms. Geller you were infact experiencing braxton hicks. I want you to take it easy and go on maternity leave next week". The doctor then walks away and Chandler bends down asking "So Baby Girl you think Uncle Ross is a big idiot right? That's my girl for doing that to your mommy when your Aunt Rachel was presenting a baby dino to her" he asks talking to her bump getting rewared with a kick. Rachel told him that dinosaurs make Monica crazy causing her to have braxton hicks. "That's sure my baby girl" Chandler grins, Ross runs in too asking "Are you okay Mon?". "Hey Ross wanna know why Monica got braxton hicks" Chandler questions him, Ross nods. "So it all started when Rachel(whispers to him "Secret crush") held up a stuffed baby dinosaur and see now me and Mon's baby girl Bing thinks dinosaurs suck and you are a big dummy" Chandler smirks, Ross' eyes practically come right out of his head and asks "How can the Baby think I'm a dummy? She's not even here yet". "That's easy because the baby kicked' Chandler replied. "Oh my god" Ross cries, then they all leave.

TBC...

 _ **It's early morning and I have school soon. foxstarkiller is writing 'TOW the two parts' me which means that I will publish completed part one(part one is completely finished) after school this afternoon. 'Kay kay?. Xoxoxo, XD :^)**_


	11. Meeting Ursula

NOTE: 'TOW the two parts' will be writen by foxstarkiller. This is act one.  
"This is unbelievable; it's been like a half an hour! If this was a cartoon, you'd be looking like a ham right about now. Ooh, ooh! Oh, that was a big one!"  
Those vitriolic words coming from the grouchy mother-to-be's mouth conveyed just how annoyed Monica was with herself, her soon-to-be husband, and Joey. It was Joey's idea for to eat out for lunch on this day and he decided to try out a restaurant called Riff's after having overhearing a couple of guys talking about it - particularly a hot but rather ditzy waitress who works there - and he talked Chandler into trying it out with him, to which Chandler agreed solely on the condition that Monica come along with seeing as she's very close to her due date. Naturally, as one can see, both men and the pregnant woman are very much regretting this decision.  
"Hey, hey, hey, Baby Girl, don't hurt Mommy. It's not her fault that the service in this place is so lousy," Chandler cooed, trying to calm down his soon-to-be wife and unborn child.  
Monica couldn't help but smile at this. "Baby Girl loves her daddy."  
Then he starts to rub her large bump.  
Finally the waitress appeared before them, approaching the bartender.  
"Oh, there's the waitress," Joey said. He then called out to her, "Excuse me, miss? Hello, miss?"  
The puzzled waitress spun around upon hearing the sound of a man calling out to her, unable to tell where the sound was coming from. Chandler and Monica spun around at the same to look at her and saw a stunningly familiar sight: the waitress looked exactly like Phoebe!  
Upon seeing this, they both turned back to Joey and exclaimed, rather inaccurately it has to be said, "It's Phoebe!"  
Then Monica turned back to the woman in question and said, "Hi!"  
The waitress approached the three customers, realizing they were the ones calling out to her, and said, "Hi." Then she immediately asked, "Okay, will that be all?" and attempted to leave.  
Before she got the chance to leave though, Chandler asked her, "Wait, wait! Wh-what're you doing here?"  
"Yeah, um, I was over there and then you said 'Excuse me? Hello, miss?', so now I'm here," the waitress replied, not knowing what the question given to her really meant.  
"No, no, no. How come you're working here?" Joey clarified.  
"Right, yeah, 'cause it's close to where I live and the aprons are really cute."  
Monica is really bewildered by "Phoebe's" odd behavior so she decided to ask, "Can we start over?"  
"Yeah, okay, great. I'm gonna be over here," the waitress replied.  
And with that, she wandered away, causing the three customers to loudly protest to her, "No, no, no! No, no, no!"


	12. Identical Twins

It's a wintery February day in New York City; snowplows are busy clearing up the streets. Inside the coffee house, Rachel and Phoebe are paying court to Ross.  
"So, I don't know whether he's testing me or just acting out but my monkey is out of control!"  
The monkey Ross is referring to is NOT his p***; what he's referring to is his pet monkey, a black capuchin monkey with a white face named Marcel, whom Ross' friend Bethel rescued from a science lab. As gratitude for the rescue, Ross decided to bring Marcel back to live with him at his apartment to keep him company after his divorce from Carol Willick and he decided that you reach a certain age where having a roommate was "pathet", which is totally Sanskrit for "a really cool way to live" and so NOT a lame cover up for almost telling the four people in his immediate circle of friends that he thought having roommate was pathetic. Unfortunately, as he's about to express verbally to his two friends who are currently listening to him, his relationship with the monkey isn't exactly one to write home about.  
"Like, he keeps erasing the massages on my machine, supposedly by accident."  
"No, yeah, I've done that," Rachel interjected, earning an annoyed look from Ross.  
"And then, like, three days in a row, he got to the newspaper before I did and peed all over the crossword!"  
Rachel pondered this for a brief second before stating, "I've never done that."  
"And then last night, I don't what he did but there were capers everywhere!"  
Outside in the street, Joey and Mondler arrived to peer through the window at Phoebe by bending down to look underneath the shop's sign - a large steaming cup of coffee.  
"All right, Joey, now look at her and tell us that she doesn't look exactly like her sister," Monica instructed.  
Joey did so and responded with, "I'm saying I see a difference."  
"They're twins!" Chandler pointed out.  
"Identical twins!" Monica emphatically added.  
"I don't care. Phoebe's Phoebe; Ursula's... hot!" Joey replied.  
All three came indoors and proceeded to take off their jackets and scarves and hang them up.  
While this process was taking place, Chandler decided to ask Joey, "You know that thing where you and I talk to each other about things?"  
"Yeah," Joey replied.  
"Let's not do that anymore," Chandler suggested.  
"All right," Joey dumbly agreed.  
After the three all finished hanging up their coats and scarves, they made their way towards the other three friends at the sofa, Rachel and Phoebe making room for the mother-to-be to sit down.  
"Chandler, could you be a pet and get me a muffin, please?" Monica asked of her fiancee.  
"Sure, thing, sweetums," Chandler replied right before giving Monica a nice sweet kiss on the lips.  
"Eww, guys!" Ross exclaimed in disgust.  
"Aww, they're so in love!" Rachel gushed dreamily.  
"Hey, Pheebs, guess who we saw today?" Joey asked.  
"Ooh, oh, fun!" Phoebe exclaimed excitedly. "Okay, um, Liam Nesson."  
"No."  
"Morley Safer."  
"Nope."  
"The woman who cuts my hair!"  
Rachel tired of this and decided to intercede, "Okay, look, Joe, this could be a really long game."  
"Your sister Ursula," Monica finally answered.  
Phoebe's face immediately dropped and she coldly said, "Oh, really?"  
Chandler came back with Monica's muffin and, while giving said muffin to Monica, said, "Yeah, yeah, she works over at that place, uh..."  
"... Riff's. Yeah, I know," Phoebe finished for him, her tone still cold.  
"Oh, you do? Because she said you haven't talked in, like, years," Monica responded.  
"Hmm, yeah. So, um is she fat?"  
Joey flashed that famous grin of his and said, "Not from where I was standing."  
Not satisfied with Joey's answer, Phoebe asked Chandler and Monica, "And where were you two standing?" which only caused the two to stare at her blankly.  
"Um, Pheebs, so you guys just don't get along?" Rachel asked.  
"It's mostly just dumb sister stuff, y'know," Phoebe explained. "I mean , like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, y'know and... Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But to my parents, by then, it was like 'yeah, right what else is new?'."  
The others all nodded their heads in understanding until Ross looked at his watch and gasped.  
"Oh, Pheebs, I'm sorry. I've gotta go; I've got Lamaze Class."  
"Oh, yeah, that's right, we've gotta get going, Chandler!" Monica exclaimed upon hearing what Ross just said.  
"Hey, you guys are going too? I thought you decided you didn't need that stuff," an astonished Joey asked.  
"Yeah, we did decide that at first, but after Ross told us that he and Carol were taking Lamaze Class, he invited us to come along seeing as how Monica's also pregnant," Chandler explained as he helped his pregnant fiancee up off the sofa.  
"He figured Carol and I could become like 'mom buddies' or something," Monica added.  
The others couldn't argue with that logic so they just accepted it.  
Rachel then turned to Ross and asked, "So, is this just gonna be you three and Carol?"  
"No, Susan's gonna be there too," Ross disappointedly answered. "We've got dads, we've pregnant ex-sisters-in-law, we've got lesbians, the whole parenting team."  
"Well, isn't that gonna be weird?"  
"No, no. I mean I might've been at first, but by now, I think I'm comfortable with the whole situation."  
As he was explaining this, Ross was so distracted by his explanation that he wound up putting on a jacket that wasn't actually his, which didn't go unnoticed by Rachel.  
"Uh, Ross? That's my jacket."  
"I know."  
With that, Ross removed Rachel's girly jacket, grabbed his own, and rushed out of the coffee shop with Chandler and Monica trailing right behind him, all while leaving three grinning friends in his wake.


	13. Lamaze Class

At the Lamaze Class, several couples and one trio are sat on the floor, all introducing themselves to the teacher who's gotten as far as a woman sitting next to Chandler and Monica.  
"Hi, we're the Rostins. I'm J.C. And he's Michael, and we're having a boy and a girl," the woman next to Chandler and Monica said while placing her hands on her bulge one by one to introduce her twin children.  
The teacher chuckled and said, "Good for you." She then looked at Chandler and Monica and asked, "Alrighty, next?"  
"Hi, I'm Chandler Bing..."  
"... and I'm his fiancee Monica Geller..."  
"... and this is our Baby Girl Bing," Mondler simultaneously finished the introduction while each placing one hand on Monica's bump.  
"Aww, engaged and expecting; how sweet," the teacher gushed, causing Chandler and Monica to blush. She then turned to Ross and the lesbian lovers and asked, "Okay, next?"  
"Hi, um, I'm err... ahem... I'm Monica's older brother Ross Geller and err ah that's, that's my boy in there," Ross introduced as he patted Carol's bulge. "and, uh, this is Carol Willick and this..." his face immediately hardened and his voice somewhat cooled, "... is Susan Bunch." He then took a quick pause before continuing the introduction. "Susan is, um, Carol's..." finally embarrassment overwhelmed the poor man, causing him to become incoherent until he finally asked, "... who's next?"  
Unfortunately for him, the teacher wasn't about to let this slide. "I'm sorry I didn't get that; Susan is...?"  
Susan was about to answer herself but Ross beat her to the punch. "Susan's Carol's, Carol's, Carol's friend."  
"Life partner," Carol finally admitted.  
"Like buddies," Ross stubbornly threw in.  
"Like lovers," Susan corrected.  
"You know how close women can get," the mortified Ross added.  
The teacher raised her eyebrows while smiling as Chandler and Monica just facepalmed out of sheer embarrassment.  
"Susan and I live together," Carol explained while she and Susan patted each other affectionately.  
"Although I was married to her," Ross added.  
"Carol, not me," Susan clarified.  
"Right, right," Ross agreed.  
"It's a little complicated," Carol explained.  
"A little," Ross added.  
"But we're fine," Susan also added.  
"Absolutely," Ross threw in. He then tried to defuse his humiliation by turning to the Rostins and quipping, "So, twins... hah! That's like two births." It went over like a fart in church, so he then gripped his right knee with his right hand and said, "Ouch!"  
The teacher turned back to Monica and asked, "And he's your older brother?"  
"He said that, not me," Monica innocently replied.


	14. Jealously

That evening at Monica and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and the girls are all there dividing pizza amongst themselves - they ordered the Joey Special: two pizzas - while the sitcom Family Matters is playing on the TV.  
"So aside from Ross making an ass out of himself, how'd the Lamaze class go?" Rachel asked her pregnant roommate.  
"It went great," Monica replied.  
"Yeah, I can't believe what we were missing out on by deciding we didn't need it," Chandler added. "The other couples there are really nice and Monica and Carol actually did become mom buddies."  
"See, Mon? I told you it'd happen," Ross gloated, causing Monica to humorously stick her tongue out at him. Ross then turned to Rachel and said, "And for the record, I did NOT make an a** out of myself; I just... acted like a dork."  
"Eh, tomato, potato," Rachel just shrugged, completely oblivious to the fact that she said the "tomato, tomahto" phrase wrong.  
Marcel, the aforementioned monkey, began to scamper about, interfering with the neatness.  
Monica caught the monkey grabbing the remote to the TV and said, "Ross, your little creature's got the remote again."  
"Marcel! Marcel, give Rossie the remote!" Ross' command fell on deaf ears. "Marcel! Marcel, you give Rossie the remote right now!" Still no compliance. "Marce... you give Rossie the remote..."  
Ross' voice trailed off after Marcel pointed the remote at the TV and pressed a particular combination of keys, activating the TV's Secondary Audio Program, resulting in the SAP logo appearing on the screen and the audio suddenly being dubbed in Spanish.  
"Great," Monica deadpanned in annoyance.  
"Relax, I'll fix it," Ross assured as he went to take the remote from Marcel.  
Rachel watched the scene playing out in Spanish on the TV and exclaimed, "Oh, cool! 'Urkel' in Spanish is 'Urkel'!"  
"How did he do this?" Ross asked as he looked at the remote.  
As this was going on, Joey entered the apartment, looking extremely pleased with himself.  
"Hey, Joe, where you been?" Chandler asked as he spotted Joey walking in.  
"Went back to Riff's," Joey replied. "I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee; she brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries."  
"Score," Chandler deadpanned, not entirely convinced.  
"She is so hot!" Joey exclaimed.  
Sensing where Joey was going with this, Chandler decided to step in and give a little bit of advice, "Yeah, listen, before you go and do anything, y'know, Joey-like, you might wanna run it by err..." his voice trailed off as he began to indicate Phoebe, who was currently helping Ross out with the remote.  
Joey followed Chandler's advice and approached Phoebe, "Hey, Pheebs?"  
Phoebe jumped up, "Yeah?"  
"Would it be okay if I asked out your sister?"  
Phoebe's eyes bulged in horror upon hearing the question. "Why? Why would you wanna do that? Why?"  
"So that if we went out on a date, she'd be there," Joey replied back as though Phoebe were the one that was slow in the head.  
Phoebe's demeanor suddenly went down a little as she began muttering, "Well, I mean, I'm not my sister's, y'know, whatever, and um... I mean, it's true we were one egg once, but err, y'know, we've grown apart, so, umm... I don't know why not? Okay."  
"Cool, thanks!" Joey happily exclaimed, blissfully unaware of how Phoebe really feels about the idea of Joey dating her sister. He then gestured at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about and then left the apartment, but not before taking the untouched second pizza for himself.  
Poor Phoebe slumped back down onto the sofa next to Ross who, along with Rachel and the mother-and-father-to-be, were really concerned for her.  
"You okay?" Ross asked.  
"Yeah, I'm fine," the obviously NOT fine Phoebe replied.  
"You wanna watch Laverne y Shirley?" Ross suggested as the sitcom Laverne & Shirley began with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt.  
Rachel and Mondler did a little dance while Phoebe gave a little grin as Ross joined in the rhythm.


	15. Bipartire(Atto cinque)

The next day at the Lamaze class, each couple has a baby doll for they just finished learning how a diaper. Ross rushed in, stepping on Chandler and Monica's pretend baby, squashing its head flat, causing it to bleat in protest. He quickly performed emergency surgery and then handed the doll back to Monica.  
"Sorry, sis," Ross quickly apologized.  
"You're forgiven," Monica replied. "Just be glad this wasn't the real thing."  
"Yeah, at least we now know to keep out real child as far away from the door as possible whenever Uncle Ross enters the room," Chandler added.  
Ross simply responded with his patented "screw you" gesture and then approached Susan, who was also holding a baby doll. "Hi, sorry I'm late. Where's, where's Carol?"  
"Stuck at school; some parent-teacher thing," Susan replied. "You can go; I'll get the information."  
"No... no... no, I think I should stay; I think we should both know what's going on."  
"Oh, good, this'll be fun."  
The teacher proceeded to start the next lesson, "Alrighty, we're gonna start with some basic third stage breathing exercises, so, Mommies, why don't you get on your backs? And, coaches, you should be supporting Mommy's head."  
All the couples, including Chandler and Monica, did as they were told; all, that is, except Ross and Susan, who both just stood where they were and gestured for the other to lie down twice.  
"What, what, what?" they both asked simultaneously.  
"I'm supposed to be the mommy?" Susan incredulously asked.  
"Okay, I'm gonna play my sperm card one more time," Ross retorted.  
"Look, I don't see why I have to miss out on the coaching training just because I'm a woman."  
"I see. So what do you propose to do?"  
"I will flip you for it," Susan suggested as she put down the baby doll and pulled a quarter out of her pocket.  
"Flip me for it?" Ross incredulously asked. "No, no, no..." Susan flipped anyway. "Heads, heads, heads!"  
It's tails.  
Susan squealed triumphantly and said, "On your back... Mom."  
Chandler and Monica watched as Ross, completely under protest, got down on his back like all the other mothers, cradled in Susan's lap like all the other fathers.  
"Alright, Mommies, take a nice deep breath," the teacher instructed. All the mommies and Ross complied; Susan, forgetting herself, also did the "Mommy" action with Ross. "Good. Now imagine your vagina is opening like a flower."  
Ross came out of character to glare into the distance.  
"Man, poor Ross; can't believe Susan did that to him," Chandler whispered to his pregnant fiancee.  
"I know; if I were him, I'd have killed the bitch," Monica whispered back. "I'm so glad you and me aren't like that. I love you, Chandler."  
"I love you too, Monica."  
At the coffee house, Rachel is behind the counter, serving coffee to Phoebe.  
"So, Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?" Rachel asked.  
"Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me," Phoebe bluntly replied as though what she wished for wasn't unreasonable.  
Rachel just stared at her blankly before deciding to ask, "Okay... let me put it this way: anything from Crabtree and Evelyn?"  
"Ooh, bath salts would be nice!" Phoebe cheerfully replied.  
"Ooh, okay... good," Rachel happily replied as she made her way to the back area.  
Jamie Buckman and Fran Devanow entered the coffee house and began looking about them.  
"What is this place?" Jamie asked as she removed her coat and scarf.  
"Look, you're cold, I have to pee, and there's a cup of coffee on the window." Fran replied, indicating the shops' sign when she mentioned the cup of coffee on the window. "How bad could it be?"  
Jamie noticed Phoebe sitting at the counter and replied, "I think we have an answer."  
Fran looked at Phoebe as well and began to suspect the same thing Jamie was: that Ursula is at this coffee shop with them.  
"What's she doing here?" Fran asked, whispering in Jamie's ear.  
"This could be God's way of telling us to eat at home," Jamie replied.  
"Think she got fired at Riff's?" Fran asked as they approached the table right behind the sofa.  
"No, no, no, we were there last night," Jamie replied. "She kept..." she shuddered at the memory. "...bringing swordfish." She then indicated the ladies' room and asked, "Are you gonna go to the, um...?"  
"I'm gonna wait until after we order," Fran replied. "It's her, right?"  
"It looks like her."  
Phoebe walked by, completely ignoring the two strangers.  
"Um, excuse me?" Jamie called out to Phoebe.  
"Yeah?" Phoebe responded as stopped and turned to face Jamie.  
"Hi, it's us," Jamie said.  
Phoebe smiled blankly and replied, "Right, and it's me."  
"So, so you're here too?"  
"Much as you are."  
Jamie turned to Fran and, without moving her lips, said, "Your turn."  
"Err... we know what we want," Fran said to Phoebe.  
"Oh, that's good," Phoebe replied philosophically.  
"All want is two Caffe Lattes," Jamie requested.  
"And some bicotti cookies," Fran added.  
"Good choice," Phoebe replied.  
Phoebe then turned away so that the two weird women don't see the face she pulled and then sat down at the table by the window.  
As a result of this, Jamie inaccurately concluded, "It's definitely her."  
"Yeah," Fran agreed.  
With that, the two sat at the table right behind the sofa.


	16. Bipartire(Atto Sei)

The next day at Monica and Rachel's apartment, a Spanish dubbed version of The Waltons is playing on the TV; Phoebe used the remote to stop the Spanish by turning off the television. At the table sat Monica knitting, Rachel winding a ball of wool, and Chandler supplying them both from a skein which is spread between his hands. As this activity was going on, Chandler took a quick look out at the balcony and decided to bring up a subject he'd meant to bring up the other night but didn't get a chance to due to Joey asking Phoebe's permission to date her sister.  
"So tell me something, Mon, is keeping the Christmas lights up part of your plane to keep us merry all year long?"  
This question caused Rachel to turn her head towards the balcony, finally noticing that the Christmas lights have indeed overstayed their welcome.  
"Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around New Year's, but obviously someone forgot," Monica explained, emphasizing "someone" to mean Rachel.  
"Well, someone was supposed to write 'Rach, take down the lights' and put it on the refrigerate..." Rachel's voice trailed off as she turned around and finally noticed Monica's note in question stuck to the refrigerator. "How long's that been there?"  
"A really long time," Monica deadpanned in replience.  
Joey let himself into the apartment carrying a large paper shopping bag.  
"Hi, everybody," Joey greeted.  
The next two lines of dialogue are said simultaneously.  
"Hi, Joey," Rachel and Monica greeted simultaneously.  
"Hey, Joe," Chandler greeted.  
Joey brought the shopping bag over to Phoebe and took out a nice cardigan.  
"Hey, Pheebs, could you do me a favor? Could you try this? I just wanna make sure it fits."  
Upon seeing the cardigan, Phoebe lit up and delightedly took it and examined it in her lap.  
"Ooh, my first birthday present! Oh, Joey, this is really..."  
"Oh, no no no. It's for Ursula," Joey clarified. "I just figured, y'know, size-wise."  
Phoebe's demeanor immediately dropped upon hearing that.  
"Ohhh... Sure, yeah..." she stood up and held the cardigan to her body for a split second..."..okay, it fits." ...and the disgustedly dropped the cardigan back into the bag, much to Joey's surprise.  
The others have been taking all this in.  
"Are you seeing her again tonight?" Rachel asked.  
"Yep. Ice Capades," Joey replied.  
"Wow, this is serious; I've never known you to pay money for any kind of capade," an astonished Chandler stated.  
Joey stood up off of the coffee table and crossed over to the kitchen where everybody else is while saying, "I don't know, I like her, y'know. She's different. There's, uh, somethin' about her..."  
"That you like, we get it. You like her. Great!" Phoebe snapped, confronting Joey over the heads of the knitting circle, who froze in apprehension.  
"Hey, Phoebe I asked you and said it was okay," Joey pointed out, surprised by Phoebe's change in tone.  
"Alright, well, maybe now it's not okay," Phoebe replied, finally letting her true feelings about Joey dating her sister out into the open.  
"Okay... well maybe now I'm not okay with it not being okay," Joey retorted, taking a stand against Phoebe's objection.  
"Okay," Phoebe retorted back, taking a stand against Joey's stand.  
An embarrassed silence ensued as Joey and Phoebe just stood glowering at each other over the heads of the knitting circle.  
Finally the silence was broken by Chandler commanding Monica to, "Knit, baby mama, knit, knit!"  
Monica complied, frantically bursting into action as Rachel resumed winding, tangling Chandler's wool.  
Later that day at the Lamaze Class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susan's lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video which is about to end.  
"...a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is the miracle of birth," the soothing male voice on the video said as the video came to an end.  
"Lights please?" the teacher asked. Then, as her request was complied, she turned the TV off while saying, "And that's having a baby. Next week is our final class. "  
People started getting up. As Chandler was helping up Monica, who was also cradling a pretend baby, Ross grabbed Carol's doll and proceeded to hold it upside down like a football, slapping it with his other hand.  
He saw Susan get back to feet and said, "Susan, go deep."  
Susan just glared back at Ross as his inappropriate joke fell flat; she wasn't the only one.  
"Okay, it's official: you're not allowed to hold our child... ever," Chandler scolded as he and Monica showed their disapproval of Ross' inappropriate joke.  
Meanwhile, a bubble was about to burst...  
"It's impossible. It's just impossible!" Carol moaned as she sat trembling on the floor.  
"What is honey?" Susan asked, concerned for her lover.  
"What that woman... did," Carol replied, pointing to the TV. "I am not doin' that. It's just gonna have to stay in, that's all," she started to ramble as Susan and Ross helped her to her feet. "Everything will be the same; it'll just stay in."  
"Carol, honey, shh, shh, everything's gonna be alright," Ross said, trying to console her.  
Carol was about to throw a snappy retort back at him, but Monica beat her to the punch.  
"OH, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW?! NO-ONE'S GOING UP TO YOU AND SAYING, 'HI, IS THAT YOUR NOSTRIL? MIND IF WE PUSH THIS POT ROAST THROUGH IT?'!"  
"Okay, okay, Mon, Mon, sweetie, cleansing breath, cleansing breath," Chandler calmly instructed as he led Monica away from her brother.  
Monica did as she was told, gulping in air, and started to cry, "Stupid pregnancy hormones."  
Chandler just held Monica close to him comfortingly.  
As this is going on, Ross looked at his "football" and then manipulated the head & limbs back into place, until it resembles what it represents.  
"Carol, honey, listen, I know it's frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when it's over, we're all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives," Susan said to her lover, comforting her. "I mean, that's what this is all about, right? Ross? Ross?"  
Ross is just staring blankly into space.  
"Ross? Buddy? Hello?" Chandler asked as he started waving his hand in front of Ross' face to no response.  
That evening at the coffee house, the gang is gathered around Mondler comforting Ross, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security.  
"I'm gonna be a father," Ross dejectedly stated.  
"Is this just occurring to you?" Monica asked.  
"I always knew I was having a baby, I just never realized the baby was having me," Ross explained.  
"Oh, you're gonna be great!" Rachel said, comforting him too.  
"Aw, how can you say that? I can't even get Marcel to stop eating the bathmat. How am I gonna raise a kid?"  
"You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying that monkeys and babies are actually different," Chandler pointed out, earning a look from Hell from Ross. "you... might want to look into it."  
Joey tired of this so he got up to leave.  
"Where're you going?" Phoebe asked Joey.  
"Out," Joey simply replied.  
"With...?" Phoebe prodded, making Joey stop dead in his tracks.  
"Yes," Joey replied, spreading his arms wide in annoyance.  
"Alright, could I just ask you one question?" Joey nodded his head. "Have you two, y'know... like... y'know... y'know... yet?"  
"Well, not that it's any of your business, but no, we haven't, okay?" He walked toward the door, then hesitated and turned back. "You meant sex, right?"  
Phoebe just buttoned her lip, while the rest of the gang pretended they weren't there.


	17. Bipartire(Atto Sette)

The next day at Chandler's office, Chandler is at his desk working. The buzzer on his intercom sounded so he answered it.  
"And..." he made a sound to imitate the buzzer "... to you too, Helen.  
"Mr. Douglas is here to see you," Helen said on the other end of the intercom.  
"All right, send him in."  
In no time at all, Chandler's boss, Mr. Douglas, entered the office.  
"Mr. D, how's it going, sir?"  
"Ohh, it's been better," Mr. Douglas replied as he closed the door behind him. "The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in."  
"And?"  
"It's pretty ugly. We haven't seen an Anus this bad since the 70's."  
"So what does this mean?"  
"Well, we're gonna be laying off people in every department."  
Chandler became frightened by this news.  
"Hey, listen, I can't afford to lose this job, not with the baby coming so soon; I know I came in late last week, but I slept funny, and my hair was very very snarly..."  
"Not you. Relax."  
Chandler breathed a sigh of relief as he sat back down at his desk.  
"Ever have to fire anyone?" Mr. Douglas asked as he took a seat on top of the desk.  
"No, but that's not a problem sir; that's why my name's on the door," Chandler replied. "By the way, do you know when I'm getting my name on the door?"  
"I don't know; I, I put it in the thing."  
"It's okay. So who's it gonna be?"  
That night at Monica and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Phoebe, and Mondler are sharing a bowl of popcorn while Rachel is carefully reading the instruction manual for the TV. Chandler is regaling the group of what happened at his work that day.  
"So, I wound up having to lay off Nina Bookbinder."  
"That cute intern who gives me the evil eye every time I visit you because she has a crush on you?" Monica asked. "Honestly, girl, I'd say take the hint, but really there's no hinting going on; he's not interested in you!"  
"Yes, that Nina Bookbinder," Chandler replied.  
"So, why'd you have to lay off her?" Ross asked.  
"Because she's been post-dating her Friday numbers," Chandler replied.  
"Which is bad because...?" Phoebe asked.  
"Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack," Chandler explained.  
"Your what?!" Monica incredulously asked.  
"WENUS: Weekly Estimated..."  
"... oh, Net Usage Statistics, right. Gotcha. I thought you meant... something else entirely," Monica sheepishly said.  
"Well, actually if you wanna get technical about it, the wenis is actually the skin that covers the tip of your elbow, not another term for the... you know what," Ross explained, earning weird looks from the rest of the group. "Well, it is."  
"Anyway..." Monica segued. "...so how'd she take the news?"  
"Pretty well... except for the whole stapler thing," Chandler replied while holding up his left hand which is now bandaged up. "Little tip: if you're ever in a similar situation, never ever leave your hand on the desk."  
"Okay, I think I get how to do this," Rachel said as she finished reading the manual.  
She pointed the remote at the TV and punched out a key combination from the book, but the dreaded SAP logo stayed on the screen and Spanish still came forth.  
"Alright, so, can we turn this off? Can we just make... make them go away? Because I can't, I can't watch," Phoebe snappily said to the amazement of the others.  
Rachel remotely turned off the TV and said, "Okay, Pheebs, they're gone."  
"Okay," Phoebe softly said while looking at her hands.  
The others became really concerned for her now.  
"Are you alright?" Monica asked.  
"Yeah. It's just, y'know, it's this whole stupid Ursula thing," Phoebe replied.  
"Okay, Pheebs, can I ask? So, Joey's going out with her. I mean, is it really so terrible?" Rachel asked.  
"Um, yeah," Phoebe bluntly replied. "Look, I mean, I'm not saying she's like evil or anything; she just, y'know, she's always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, I wouldn't let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then when I was twelve, she broke my collar bone. All right, she didn't mean to do it but I think it still counts." Chandler nodded his head. "And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?"  
"Yes," Monica replied as she and Chandler smiled lovingly at each other.  
"No," Rachel wistfully replied, shaking her head.  
"Well, that's what he was for me," Phoebe explained. "And she, y'know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldn't even talk to me any more. Because he said he didn't wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us."  
"Oh... oh, Pheebs," Rachel sighed sympathetically.  
"I mean, I know Joey's not my boyfriend, or my thermos, or anything, but... "  
"Hey, you're not gonna lose him," Chandler assured softly.  
"Hon, you gotta talk to Joey," Monica suggested.  
"Yeah, okay," Phoebe scoffed.  
"No, come on, he doesn't know this stuff," Ross persisted. "I'm sure if he knew how you felt..."  
"But he's falling in love with her!" Phoebe persisted harder.  
"Oh please, they've been going out a week; they haven't even slept together yet, I mean, that's not serious," Rachel persisted even harder.  
"Okay... okay," Phoebe finally relented. The others made a gesture to indicate that they mean right now. "Oh, okay, oh."  
Phoebe got up and walked across the hallway, but the door to Chandler and Joey's apartment is shut. She knocked on the door and anxiously waited for Joey to come, but instead her identical twin sister emerged, wearing one of Joey's shirts.  
"Oh!" Ursula exclaimed in surprise upon seeing her identical twin sister being on the other side of the door.  
Phoebe reeled back in shock upon seeing her identical twin sister wearing one of Joey's shirts, confirming to all who have eyes and brains the she had in fact slept with Joey.  
"Yeah, um, may we help you?" Ursula while she defiantly leaned against the doorpost as though she owns the place.  
It goes without saying that Phoebe is too stunned to answer or even speak.


	18. Bipartire(Atto Ocho)

Later that night on Monica and Rachel's balcony, Rachel is taking down the Christmas lights.  
Monica saw her then leaned out of the small side window and yelled, "Rachel, what the hell are you doing? It's freezing out here. Would you come back inside?"  
"No, no, no, no, no. You wanted me to take them down, so I'm takin' 'em down. Okay?" Rachel retorted as climbed onto the railing to reach the top of the pole.  
"Hey, don't talk back to me, Rachel Karen Greene!" a very pregnant Monica yelled back. "You stop taking the lights down and get back in here right now, young lady!"  
Rachel hated it when people middle named her and called her "young lady" like they were her father so stubbornly replied "No way," with a slight snicker.  
"Damn it, Rach, I'm not gonna tell you agai-" Monica started to say before she got cut off by her unborn child. "Oh, oh God no, oww!"  
"Oh my God, Monica, are you alright?" Rachel asked in horror as she stopped what she was doing and rushed over to her pregnant friend.  
"Baby Girl! She's kicking really hard now!" Monica gasped in pain.  
"Oh God! Oh my God!" Rachel gasped in horror. She then began to lead Monica over to the sofa. "Okay, okay, Mon, come over here. Over here. On the couch, Mon, on the couch."  
"Rach, Rach, call Chandler please?" Monica pleaded as she lied down on the sofa.  
"Okay, okay, I will, don't worry I will," Rachel calmly assured. "Chandler! Chandler! Come here, quick!"  
The man in question came bursting through the door as soon he heard his name being called out.  
"I'm here, Rach, I'm here. What's wrong?" he asked in concern  
"It's Monica; Baby Girl's kicking her really hard," Rachel replied, pointing to the mother-to-be lying on the sofa in pain.  
Without hesitation, Chandler knelt down beside his pregnant fiancee and comfortingly placed his hand on her bump.  
"Hey, Baby Girl, are you hurting Mommy? Please don't do that; she's kept you in there for nine months now," Chandler soothingly asked the unborn child, which worked like a charm as usual. He then turned to Monica and Rachel and asked, "So, what brought this on anyway?"  
"Well, I saw Rachel out on the balcony taking down the Christmas lights..." Monica started to say.  
"Oh my God, you STILL have your Christmas lights up and you're just NOW taking them down?!" Chandler interrupted, glaring at incredulously at Rachel, who just glowered back at him.  
"Anyway, I kept telling her to stop and to come back inside, but she refused to listen so I tried again and that's when the baby started jostling my insides," Monica finished explaining.  
"Oh, that's all? So, Baby Girl thinks Aunt Rachel is a big airhead, right? That's my girl for doing that to Mommy when Aunt Rachel is taking down the Christmas lights long after she was supposed to, especially on the cold night like this."  
"I'm standing right here, y'know!" Rachel angrily muttered through gritted teeth.  
"I know," Chandler casually replied. "Still though, something's got to be done about the Christmas lights." He then turned to Rachel after an idea popped into his head. "Tell you what: since you already started taking 'em down, how about I help you finish the job? Seems like a two person job anyway, don't you think?"  
"Yeah, yeah, I guess so," Rachel deflatedly replied.  
Chandler turned to Monica and suggested, "And you just lie here and get some rest; I don't want the woman I love going into false labor again. Is that alright with you?"  
"That's be good," a chocked up Monica replied.  
With that, Chandler and Rachel headed out to the balcony to finish taking down the Christmas lights.  
The next day at the coffee house, Rachel - having successfully taken down the Christmas lights with Fhandler without getting injured - is now sitting on the sofa, having the newspaper split up so she can look at the want ads - she's taking the day off from work - and Joey can look at the funnies, while Ross' inappropriate joke at the Lamaze class has come back to haunt him.  
"I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid," Ross said.  
"That's nice," Rachel and Joey replied, not understanding the real meaning of what he said.  
"No, no, WITH him," Ross clarified, causing Rachel and Joey to put down their newspapers so they can listen intently. "I'm on this field, and they, they hike me the baby... and I, I know I've gotta do something 'cause the Tampa Bay defense is comin' right me."  
"Tampa Bay's got a terrible team," Joey pointed out.  
"Right, but, it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinkin' they can take us," Ross explained. "And so I uh, hah-hah, I just heave it down field."  
"What're you crazy?! That's a baby!" Rachel incredulously exclaimed.  
"He should take the sack?" Joey dumbly asked.  
"Anyway, suddenly I'm down field," Ross continued. "and I realize that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? Only I know there is no way I'm gonna get there in time, so I am running, and running, and that, that is when I woke up. See I, I am so not ready to be a father."  
"Hey, you're gonna be fine," Rachel comfortingly reassured. "You're one of the most caring, most responsible men in North America; you're gonna make a great dad."  
"Yeah, Ross, you and the baby just need better blocking," Joey added.  
Feeling a little better, Ross got up to go fetch some more coffee.  
"Oh, have either one of you ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it real expensive?" Joey asked.  
"Well, only if you order stuff," Rachel retorted.  
"I'm takin' Ursula there tonight, it's her birthday," Joey explained.  
"Wo-wo-whoa!" Ross exclaimed as he came back with his coffee. "What about Phoebe's birthday?"  
"When's that?" Joey dumbly asked.  
"Tonight," Ross replied.  
"Oh, man. What're the odds of that happening?" Joey began contemplating his ill fortune.  
"You take your time," Rachel instructed as she and Ross waited patiently for Joey to figure it out.  
Joey looks at his friends, thought a bit more, then finally it hit him.  
"There it is!" Rachel exclaimed as Joey finally figured it out. "So what're you gonna do?"  
"What can I do? Look, I don't want to do anything to screw it up with Ursula," Joey reasoned.  
"And your friend Phoebe?" Rachel pointed out.  
"Well, if she's my friend, hopefully she'll understand. I mean, you'd understand, wouldn't you, Rach? You're a woman right?"  
"Yes, Joe, I am a woman and as such, I'll have you know that if you tried something like that on my birthday, you'll be staring at more than just the business end of a hissy fit."  
Joey made a gesture to show that he wouldn't dare.


	19. Bipartire(Atto Nove)

That night at Monica and Rachel's apartment, everybody but Joey is there waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party except for Ross is bringing the birthday cake.  
"Hey, Mon, are you sure you're up to being the hostess here? Remember what the doctor said," Chandler voiced with concern for his very pregnant fiancee.  
"Yes, Chandler, I remember; I have to take it easy until I'm due. Don't worry, I can handle one lousy birthday party," Monica reassured with confidence. "Besides, you and Rachel are doing all the work, anyway."  
"Yeah, that is true," Chandler couldn't help but agree as he watched Rachel serving drinks to the guests in much the same way serves customers at the coffee house. He then placed a hand on her large bump, where their baby girl was growing inside of her mother, and kissed her.  
Just then, there was a knock on the door.  
"Uh-oh, that's her!" Rachel exclaimed. "Okay, Mon, you and Chandler get the door; everybody else hide!"  
"Hey, I thought I was the one who would be barking out orders," Monica complained, as she rubbed her large belly.  
"Oh, just do it already!" Rachel fired back.  
"Okay, okay!" Monica relented. She then whispered into Chandler's ear, "Sheesh, and people think I'm bossy."  
As the rest of the party guests ran and hid, Rachel turned the music off and went down on all fours to hide behind the sofa; as she did so a rather noticeable ripping sound was heard.  
"Crap," Rachel muttered to herself.  
Finally, Chandler and Monica answered the door.  
The whole party jumped up and yelled, "SURPRISE!" at the person who stood in the doorway, too keyed up to notice that it's Ross, holding a box. Ross was so startled that he threw his arms up to defend himself. The was launched from his hands and then landed with a squishy thud, its contents oozing out onto the floor. Needless to say, Ross is not pleased.  
"What the Hell are you doing? You scared the crap out of me!" Ross said, glaring at Chandler and Monica.  
"Was that the cake?" Chandler asked, pointing to the box as Ross bent down to pick it up.  
"Yeah, yeah. I got a lemon schmush," Ross retorted as he proceeded to bring the box over to the coffee table.  
"Come on, she'll be here any minute," Monica said as she closed the door.  
"I hope it's okay," Rachel said.  
The whole party gathered around as Ross put the box on the coffee table. As he opened the lid, everybody looked at the mess inside and let out a collective groan.  
"'Happy Birthday, Peehe'," Chandler read out loud, earning an annoyed glower from Ross.  
"Well maybe we can make a, a, a 'B' out of one of those roses," Monica suggested.  
"Yeah, we'll just use our special cake tools!" Ross retorted, still annoyed.  
As this was going on, Phoebe quietly wandered in to join the tableau.  
"Hey what's going on?" Phoebe asked the group of people gathered around the coffee table.  
"Oh, we just..." Ross started to say before everybody noticed the guest of honor.  
"Surprise!"  
Phoebe began squealing in delight, "Oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary." She then looked at the smushed cake. "Oh look- Happy Birthday Peehe. What a strange new nickname; I like it. Oh my god! Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi!" She looked at Monica thrilled. "You found Betty! Oh my god!" She then began hugging all of her friends. "This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room!" Still happy, she made the fatal mistake of asking, "Where's Joey?"  
The whole party immediately fell flat upon hearing her ask that question.  
Chandler tried to think of a witticism, but even he couldn't help, so he instead asked, "Did you see Betty?"  
Ross even pointed to Betty who waggled her fingers to say "Hi", but Phoebe just looked away in disappointment, feeling that her birthday has been ruined by her twin.  
The next day, Ross is at a restaurant, is having lunch with his father who is examining his next forkful.  
"I tell you one thing, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried tomato business," Jack said. "Five years ago, if somebody had said to me 'here's a tomato that looks like a prune', I'd say 'get out of my office!'"  
"Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all?" Ross asked, seeking advice on how to be a father from his own father.  
"I'm not freaking out, I'm just saying, if somebody had come to me with the idea that... "  
"Dad, Dad, Dad, I'm talkin' about the whole uh, baby thing," Ross clarified. "Did you uh, ever get this sort of... panicky 'Oh my god I'm gonna be a father' kind of a thing?"  
"No, we just had kids back then; we didn't think about it. What else could the sun dry, I wonder?"  
"Dad, come on, kids."  
"Right, look, your mother really did the work; I was busy with the business. I wasn't around that much. Is that what this is about?"  
"No, no, Dad, I was just wondering..."  
"'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?"  
"Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know, um... when did you start to feel like a father?"  
Jack thought carefully about it before he got his answer.  
"Oh, well, I, I guess it must've been the day after you were born. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in and gave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing..." Ross chuckled at that. "...and all of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your whole fist and you squeezed it so tight and that's when I knew."  
Ross was so moved by his father's charming story that he stopped eating.  
"So you don't wanna go to Williamsburg?" Jack asked.  
"No, we can go to Williamsburg," Ross replied.  
"Eat you fish," Jack commanded.  
Ross replied, satisfied with his father's answer, though not completely satisfied.


	20. Bipartire(Atto diece)

Later that day at Monica and Rachel's apartment, the whole group except Joey are sat around the coffee table playing Scrabble.  
Phoebe just laid down letters on the board and Ross, who was keeping score, looked at what she put down.  
"Umm, Pheebs, I don't think 'scrunchy' is a word."  
"Why not? If 'crunchy' is a word, why isn't 'scrunchy'?"  
Phoebe's response just caused Ross to shake his head in disbelief.  
"Well, okay, then I am using that same argument for 'fligament'," Chandler deadpanned.  
Rachel becomes distracted by Marcel as he clambered all over the furniture and grabbed the remote again.  
"Ross, he's got the remote again."  
"Good. Maybe he can switch it back."  
Marcel changed channel to a Bugs Bunny cartoon which is being broadcast in Spanish.  
"Maybe not."  
Monica was about to put down a word onto the board when suddenly a familiar feeling started creeping up on her.  
"Uh-oh, Chandler, Chandler, I think we need to go to the hospital!"  
"Wh-wh-why, what's wrong?" Chandler began to panic.  
"I think I'm - WOO! - I think I'm going into false labor."  
"Again? How is that possible? We were being careful this time."  
"I don't know - WHOA! - Maybe this is some kind of delayed reaction to the other night when I yelled at Rachel!"  
"Okay, okay, well, let's get you to the hospital to get this looked at, alright?"  
"Yeah, let's," Monica agreed as Chandler helped her onto her feet. "Oh, God! OW! OO!"  
"You want us all to come long too?" Ross asked in concern for his sister.  
"No, you should stay put; if this just false labor then there's nothing to worry about," Chandler replied. He then turned to Monica and said, "Okay, Mon, take my hand." Monica did so. "Her we g... Aah, crushing bones! Good thing we're going to the hospital." Chandler the proceeded to lead Monica out of the apartment, but not before turning back to the others and saying, "Oh, and if Joey shows up, don't tell him where we're going; we don't want him to worry about us."  
"Okay," the others all replied.  
With Chandler and Monica out of the apartment, the others sat where they were, contemplating what just happened.  
"My God, I can't believe that happened!" Rachel exclaimed.  
"I know, another bout of false labor?" Ross conquered. "Isn't once more than enough?"  
"One would think right?" Phoebe interjected. "Hey, Rach, what did she mean when she said 'delayed reaction to the other night when I yelled at Rachel'?"  
"Well, the other night, I was taking down the Christmas lights..." Rachel started to explain.  
"What? You still have your Christmas lights up?" Ross incredulously asked, causing Rachel to give him a death glare.  
"Had; still had them up," Rachel angrily clarified through gritted teeth. "Anywho, Monica saw me and yelled at me to stop and come back inside but I refused to listen, especially after she middle named me and called me 'young lady' and then suddenly Baby Girl started jostling her insides really hard."  
"And you didn't think to take her to the hospital then?" Ross incredulously asked.  
"Well, after Chandler came in and calmed the baby down with his sweet talk, we thought that was the end of it. She wasn't having any problems after that... until now anyway. How was I supposed to know this was going to end up happening."  
Ross and Phoebe took a moment to digest what Rachel had just said and they both came to the conclusion that she was right; there really was no way she or Chandler and Monica could've known that Monica might end up experiencing false labor again, especially since it seemed to come pretty much right out of the blue this time around.  
"Well, for what it's worth, at least she caught this one really quickly and he's taking her straight to the hospital," Phoebe said.  
"That's true; he's gonna be a wonderful father," Ross conquered.  
"And she a terrific mother," Rachel added. "Okay, well, since they suggested we not go with them, I guess we can continue this game without them. What d'ya say?"  
"Sure, I can do that," Ross and Phoebe conquered simultaneously.  
"Okay, so who's turn is it now?" Phoebe asked.  
"I guess it's mine since I was after Chandler and Monica," Ross replied, laying letters onto the board.  
Rachel looked at what Ross just laid down and incredulously asked, "'Garge'?"  
"Nautical term," Ross replied.  
"Cheating man," Rachel retorted.  
"Okay," Ross conceded, taking his letters off the board.  
Finally, a dejected Joey quietly entered the apartment.  
"Hey, everybody," Joey greeted less than cheerfully.  
"Hey, Joe," Ross greeted back.  
"Hi, Joey," Rachel greeted softly.  
"Trouble?" Phoebe coldly asked.  
"Your sister stood me up last night," Joey replied.  
"Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you?" Phoebe angrily deadpanned, showing no sympathy for Joey.  
"Well did you try calling her?" Rachel asked.  
"I've been trying for all day," Joey explained. "When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off."  
"Oh, honey," Rachel cooed as she abandoned the Scrabble game to give Joey a comforting hug while Ross simply placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.  
Phoebe really wanted to be angry with Joey but as she watched him shaking his head in pain and disbelief, she knew it wasn't his fault.


	21. Safe

Later that day at Riff's, Ursula is waiting tables in her own inimitable manner. With a pad and pen in her hand, she walked by two ladies at a table who are waiting for their order.

"Excuse me, we had the two chef salads," one of the waiting ladies at the table called out to her.

"Oh, and how were they?" Ursula asked, inaccurately assuming that they had already had them.

"No..we haven't had them yet; we're still hoping to have them," the lady clarified, visibly annoyed.

Ursula crossed her fingers and said, "Okay," before disappearing into the kitchen.

Phoebe entered the restaurant. Ursula returned with two plates of chicken, but she only has time to set one on the table when Phoebe approached her.

"Hey."

"Oh!" Ursula turned in surprise and approached her sister.

"Um you, you got a minute?" Phoebe asked.

"Um, yeah, I'm just... working," Ursula replied, waving dismissively at the concept.

Ursula pointed to a vacant table and the twins walked over, side by side, to sit down. Departing customers walked right past the pair. Sitting at the back, a hungry gentleman looked most annoyed as Ursula set his meal down in front of her.

"So," Phoebe simply said.

"Uh-huh," Ursula simply said back.

Ursula is genuinely pleased that her sister has visited her after so many years; Phoebe is hesitating over how to begin.

"Um, oh, I got you a birthday present," Phoebe said.

Ursula picked up a fork and began eating the meat, while Phoebe removed a present from her bag.

"Oh, wow! You remembered!" Ursula happily exclaimed. She then opened the present and pulled out thermos. "Oh! It's a Judy Jetson thermos!"

She laughed at the childhood memory; Phoebe smiled at being able to make her point.

"Right, like the kind you..." Phoebe started to say.

"Right..." Ursula said back. "Oh, I got something for you, too."

Ursula got up to fetch a box from her bag by the counter.

"How'd you know I was coming?" Phoebe asked.

"Um, yeah, um, twin thing," Ursula replied as she brought the box back to the table with her and put the box directly into Phoebe's hand.

Phoebe brightened. "I can't believe you did this." She then opens the box, to find something familiar inside. "I can't believe you..." she pulled out and held up Joey's cardigan, the one Joey got Ursula for her birthday. "...did this."

Phoebe's smile hardened as she packed the cardigan away.

"So... what's the deal with, umm, you and Joey?" Phoebe asked.

"Oh, right, he's so great, but that's over," Ursula replied as she resumes eating her lunch.

"Does he know?" Phoebe asked.

"Who?" Ursula asked, completely forgetting what they were talking about.

"Joey," Phoebe replied. "You know, um, he's really nutsy about you."

"He is?" Ursula asked, surprised bat this information."Why?"

"You got me," Phoebe replied honestly.

"Right," Ursula conquered.

A waiter comes over for the stolen chicken.

Ursula turns to him and asked, "Excuse me, doesn't this come with a side salad?"

The man just shook his head and walked away.

"So, um, are you gonna call him?" Phoebe asked, trying to get back on topic.

"Why? Do you think he likes me?" Ursula asked while pointing to the departing waiter, thinking Phoebe was talking about him.

"No, Joey," Phoebe replied, trying desperately trying not to let her aggravation show.

"Oh. No, no, he is so smart; he'll figure it out," Ursula replied. She then asked, "Do you want some chicken?" while offering to share her food.

"No, no food with a face," Phoebe reminded.

"You have not changed!" Ursula remarked, her eyes dancing as she laughed and smiled, simply glad to be back with her sister.  
"Yeah, you too," Phoebe simply replied, realizing that it's now up to her to make up for her negligent sister.

Meanwhile, at the hospital, Chandler is in the waiting room Monica came out with the doctor.

"Hey!" Chandler greeted his pregnant fiancee. He then turned to the doctor and asked, "So?"

"She's fine; she was just experiencing another bout of Braxton-Hicks contractions," the doctor replied. "Not very often do we get instances of patients experiencing it more than once; she's a real trooper, this one."

"So everything is normal; there's no danger to her and the baby?" Chandler asked.

"No, no danger at all; just remember to head the doctor's to take it easy and refrain fro many strenuous activity."

"I will. Thank you, doctor," Monica complied as the doctor exited.

"Are you alright?" Chandler asked his pregnant fiancee.

"Yes, I'm fine," Monica replied. "I'm even more fine now that I'm here with you."

The mother-and-father-to-be wrapped each other up in a warm loving embrace.

"Well, now that we know everything's fine, I guess we can head back home now," Chandler suggested.

"We sure can," Monica conquered. "I love you, Chandler."

"I love you too, Monica."

The two proceeded exit the waiting room.

Meanwhile, at Monica and Rachel's apartment, Rachel is neglecting Scrabble, deciding to help Ross overcome his doubts about his impending fatherhood. Marcel is chittering about as this goes on.

"Hey, Ross, listen, I want you to know that I really meant it when I said you were going to make a great dad." Ross listened intently to this, feeling really touched that the woman he secretly has strong romantic feelings for was talking him up so beautifully. "You've got a good heart, you're always trying to do the right thing, you're loyal to everybody you care for, and... well... you're just a great guy all around. I really believe you're gonna be a wonderful father. And... y'know, if some day the right woman comes along, I think you'll be a wonderful husband too."

Ross was so moved by what Rachel had just said that he let down his walls and looked deep into her eyes with sincere love on his face.

"Thanks, Rachel, that really means a lot to me," Ross said lovingly.

"You're welcome," Rachel replied.

The two just sat there for what felt like an eternity when it was actually a few seconds, looking into each other's eyes. As this was going on, strange new feelings began to surface inside Rachel, feelings she never knew she even had. It was as though she was starting to see Ross in a new light, like she wasn't looking at Monica's geeky older brother but rather a guy she could very well see herself possibly being more that just friends with.

Before she could ponder anymore on this new possibility that presented itself to her, both she and Ross were drawn out of there reverie by what almost sounded like choking. The two immediately got out of their seemingly compromising position to see Marcel stretching his neck as much as possible and making an unvoiced noise from his throat.

"What's.. what's up with the simian?" a flustered Rachel asked.  
"Oh, it's... it's just a fur ball," an equally flustered Ross answered before clearing his throat. "Okay, who's turn is it?"

"It's yours," Rachel replied. "I just got forty-three points for 'KIDNEY'."

"No, no, you got zero points for 'IDNEY'," Ross said, pointing to the board.

"Wha-? I had a 'K'. Where the Hell's my 'K'?" Rachel exclaimed as she searched the board frantically.

Marcel's unvoiced hissing continued. In alarm, Ross and Rachel looked at the monkey, who is now in some distress.


	22. Chapter 22

At the hospital, Chandler and Monica were making their way out when they saw Ross and Rachel hurtle into the emergency room with little Marcel fully wrapped up in a towel cradled in Ross' arms. Curious as to what was going on, Chandler and Monica followed Ross and Rachel into the emergency room, where a frantic Ross is trying to reason with the admissions nurse.

"You've got to help me my monkey swallowed a 'K'!" Ross yelled frantically.

"You go get that animal out of here!" the admissions nurse yelled angrily.

"No, no you don't understand the animal hospital is way across town, he's choking, I don't know what else to do!" Ross yelled back.

"What's going on?" Monica asked as she and Chandler approached Ross ans Rachel.

Ross and Rachel turned at the voice...

"Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile," Rachel replied.

"Oh," Chandler understood.

...then turned back to the desk when the surprise hit them, and Ross and Rachel whipped around once more. Monica and Chandler recoiled slightly.

"Excuse me..." the admissions nurse interjected. "...this hospital is for people!"

Ross was about to make a snappy retort to that but, much to his and everybody else's surprise, Rachel beat him to the punch.

"Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? He watches Jeopardy! He, he touches himself when nobody's watching. Please, please have a heart!"

Fortunately, Ross and Rachel's vigorous protests are attracting attention.

"I'll take a look at him," a rather handsome doctor said.

Chandler, Monica, Ross and Rachel whipped around for a second time in formation.

"Oh, thank you," Mondler said. "George Clooney?!"

"Heh, actually, I'm Dr. Mitchell," the doctor chuckled humorously. "Not that I mind the freakishly accurate comparison, mind you."

With that, Dr. Mitchell allowed the group to bring the monkey into his exam room.


	23. Marcel's fine

Meanwhile, at the coffee house, Joey is sitting at the small table next to the sofa, playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe entered, but not as herself for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hung up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smoothed out the identifying garment, approaching Joey.

"Hey," Phoebe said, pretending to be Ursula.

"Urse..." Joey exclaimed, falling for the disguise. Phoebe nodded as he stood up in delight. "...ah, what're you doing here? I've been trying to call you."

"Listen, um..." Phoebe started to say.

"No, no, no, don't say 'listen'," Joey pleaded, realizing where this is going. "I know that 'listen'; I've said that 'listen'."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge?"

Phoebe is almost thrown by this.

"Yeah, um..." she nervously cleared her throat. "You know you, you should just forget about what I said under the bridge. I was talkin' crazy that night; I was so drunk!"

"You don't drink," Joey pointed out.

"That's right, I don't..." Phoebe covered. "But I was, I was drunk on you!"

"Oh, Urse..."

He tried to take her in his arms but she fended him off.

"Okay, yeah, so it's not gonna work."

"Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?"

"If it was, would you stop hanging out with her?"

Joey thought carefully about this before he finally answered, "No. No, I, I couldn't do that."

"Um, then yes, it's 'cause of Phoebe! So, you know, it's either her or me."

"Then, uh, then I'm sorry."

Joey sank to the sofa, saddened by "Ursula's" ultimatum while Phoebe followed, touched by Joey's good heart.

"You know... " she unconsciously put a hand on his knee. "...you're gonna be really, really hard to get over."

"I know..."

Joey looked up at her face and Phoebe, slipping out of character, smiled back at him.

"I don't know whether it's just 'cause we're breaking up or... what, but you've never looked so beautiful," Joey said in a soft, warm voice.

"Really?"

Phoebe smiled, flattered by the compliment, when Joey took her face in his hands and kissed her. Joey then got up to leave but stopped suddenly. Phoebe silently shouted "Oh, whoa!" to herself at how great the kiss was and leaned back in the sofa to recover, a hand to her tingling lips. A thoughtful Joey is also feeling his lips then hesitated for a moment, then returned for a better view. He thought again, cocking his head from side to side to regard her profile from various angles until...

"Pheebs?"

"Yeah," she automatically replied, completely blowing her cover.

His suspicions confirmed, Joey beamed happily at Phoebe, who beamed right back at him.

"My gosh, Phoebe, I can't believe you actually did that!"

"Yeah, well, somebody had to do something, y'know. I didn't want to lose you the same way I lost Randy Brown."

"Well, that was really sweet of you, Pheebs; I really appreciate it."

"Thanks."

"By the way, who's Randy Brown?"

"Oh, he used to be my best friend until Ursula stole him away and... well, y'know."

"Ah, I see. Well, you don't have to worry about that with me; like I told... well, you just now, I would never stop being friends with you because my girlfriend said so."

"And I'm glad that you care enough for your friends to be that way, Joey; never change, please?"

"I won't, Pheebs, ever. I promise."

Phoebe smiled at Joey, pleased to know what a great friend he was. Joey in turn smiled at Phoebe, touched that she would go to great lengths such as this in order to save their friendship.

"That was a really great kiss, by the way," Phoebe said.

"I know, I was amazed myself," Joey replied. "You're a million times better that Ursula... or any other woman I've ever kissed until now."

"Yeah and you're the best kiss I've ever had."

"Yeah... but y'know, we can't ever do that again. I mean, we don't want to do anything to completely ruin our friendship, right?"

"Yeah, you're right, we're friends; we shouldn't risk what we have." She then thought for a split second and said, "Or..."

"Yeah, yeah, 'or' is good; I like 'or'."

"...we could keep doing that in private and not let the others know about it... till we're ready."

"That's a great idea, Pheebs!"

"I know, right? I'm glad I thought of it."

So, Joey and Phoebe wrapped each other up in a passionate embrace, agreeing that they will keep their new-found non-platonic relationship secret from the others until it was the right time to let them know.

Later that day at the hospital, Marcel is lying on the operating table while recovering from the anesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross is at beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel looked on.

"He looks so tiny," Ross quietly marveled at the sight in front of him.

Suddenly, the door burst open and Joey and Phoebe came rushing in, independent from each other so the others don't notice something going on between them.

"We just got the message," Joey said.

"Is he alright?" Phoebe asked.

"Yeah, the doctor got the 'K' out," Ross replied.

"He also found an 'M' and an 'O'," Rachel added.

"We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY'," Chandler theorized.

Ross and Rachel rolled their eyes, not approving of Chandler's lame theory.

"Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine; he's just sleeping now," Ross explained.

Rachel placed her right hand on Ross' shoulder and asked, "So, you feel like a dad yet?"

"No, why?"

"Hey, come on, you came through; you did what you had to do. That is very dad."

Ross did approve of this, especially seeing as how is the woman he's secretly madly in love with saying it to him, but he's still not sure.

"Oh, look, he's waking up!" Monica whispered as the tiny figure began to stir.

"Hey, fella! How you doing?" Ross quietly asked his little buddy.

All of a sudden, Marcel grabbed Ross' finger with his whole fist and squeezed it so tight that Ross now finally knows what it is to be a father. He then looked up at his friends, who smiled encouragingly, Chandler tenderly resting his chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realized that Rachel was right; he's gonna make a great dad!


	24. The one where Monica has a baby - Part 1

**Okie I de** **cided to skip a few eppys which means they already happened in regards. Rachel got the job at Bloomingdales and Marcel got sent away. Also we are pretending this eppy that takes the place of 1x21 is in march not april. Omg that's right this is a bit like the first scene of chapter one - LOL.**

 **"** Oh my god I am so fucking tired of being pregnant" Monica moans,

"Babe come right here" Chandler says as the gang scoot back on the orange couch.

She sits next to him and he starts kissing her neck in front of everybody at the coffee house. "I love how you do that" Monica reacts to her fiance kissing her neck,

"I know you do Love" Chandler smiles and starts to kiss her neck some more causing an "Eww guys" reaction from Ross.

"Aww Ross don't ruin the romantic moment between the two" Rachel complains,

"Well we are gonna go back to the apartment now" Chandler announces and takes Monica's hand lifting her up off the couch.

But not before a woman grows a disgusted facial expression, "I'm sorry is the fucking ass overdue pregnant woman disturbing your precious little coffee time?!"

Monica yells at the woman and Chandler says "Let's go back to the apartment Love" putting her hands in his and going out the door.

Back at the apartment, Chandler asks "Cara Mia do you wanna do it right now".

Monica nods answering "Yes Mon Cherie" and then he kisses her hand and taking her into her bedroom.

When they are in there he pulls her shirt over her head and then started to unzip her pants.

But halfway through Chandler asks "Querida Mia am I hurting you and Baby Girl Bing? I don't want to force labor on you".

"Honey it's okay I want to go in labor. Just make love to me" Monica smiles as best as an overdue pregnant woman can, and he gently goes on her giving everything she desires.

At 3am Monica lie awake in her fiance's arms - his hand on her belly.

"I'm so hungry" she whines, "Huh? Mon why don't you go get something to eat" Chandler questions.

"But Baby Girl wants a slice of pizza and ice cream with rice pudding" Monica whines some more,

Chandler sighs - he shouldn't argue with his fiancee and especially if she's overdue with their first daughter.

He throws on his long coat over his pajamas and slids on his shoes.

While Chandler was out he said _'This is for my fiancee. She's overdue with our first daughter'_ when people saw him with the weird combo of food.

When he got back to the girls apartment that he is soon to move in with also, he handed Monica her food saying "Here Cara Bella".

He then questions the baby "So Baby Girl, weird cravings you and Mommy have right?".

Chandler then goes back to sleep and wakes three hours later to see Monica with a slice of pizza in her hand, her face covered with sauce and is wearing a nightgown.

Her hand also where the baby is kicking her, the sun is very bright and birds chirping.

The sky is pink and sea blue with hints of yellow and orange.

"Sleep well" he questions putting his spoon in her rice pudding, she nods but then says "I love Baby Girl Bing but I can't wait until she's born".

"I know Babe. You have to carry our kids while I get to do the fun part which is conceiving" he replies.

Chandler's statement of Monica having to carry their kids was obviously very true but this baby was obviously unexpected though they still love their Baby Girl so much: even if she's not born yet.

Chandler knows Monica is done with being pregnant at this point, he feels so bad their baby girl won't come out and he hates seeing the woman he loves in pain.

Later that day even though Monica is supposed to be on maternity leave, she's working.

Chandler is worried because she shouldn't be working while nine months pregnant(She's overdue)

Chandler is at the perk taking to the guys. "I- I can't believe I'm gonna be a father very soon" he said.

"We are both on this Dude" Ross pats his soon to be brother in-law on the back,

"I have an idea. Hey Chandler why don't you give Mon that good lovin' that you did to get her pregnant, so she can go into labor quicker" Joey suggests horny.

"Eww, dude that's my sister!" Ross exclaims, Joey earned a slap on the back from Phoebe and Rachel.

"Girls are mean!' Joey whined.

A little bit Later that day, where Chandler enters the girls apartment and Monica is reading a book.

"Hi Cara Mia and Baby Girl Bing" he greets her,

"Hey Mon Cherie" she answers.

He then starts to kiss her, and she says "Baby Girl is pushing on my bladder - she likes to use it as a chew toy, doesn't she?".

When Monica comes back from the bathroom she screams "Ouch!"

And Chandler asks "Honey are you okay?

"Baby Girl Bing - is coming now for real. Hurts so bad" Monica cries in terrible pain.

"Here Babe let's get you into the car now, think you can walk but if you can't I'll carry you" Chandler takes his fiancee's hand coaching her and then picks her up saying "This is it Mon we are gonna be parents"

"I know I'm so scared" Monica answers. "Baby don't be scared" he tells her kissing her hand.

Then he kissed her large belly and her lips, carrying her outside.

 _ **TBC...**_

 _ **Cliffhanger, huh? XD :^)**_


	25. The one where Monica has a baby - Part 2

Continued from last chapter where C&M are in one of her dad's Porsche driving to the hospital...

"OOO- ah" Monica screams as she is experiencing another contraction, "Babe are you okay" Chandler asks rubbing her leg as pain is evident on her pale & freckled face. "That was a big one" she says, "I bet it was. Baby Girl loves her mommy so much" he answers. "Uh oh" Monica feels something beneath her, "Cara Mia what just happened" Chandler asks. "My water just broke. And in the Porsche, I knew we should have taken your car or your Mom's" her face scrunched up once again, "Honey we are almost there" he assures her.

[-]

He speeds up and rolls her in a whellchair noticing that most of the gang are there. "Oh my god how the hell did you get here" Chandler questions eyeing Joey and Phoebe, then Ross and Rachel enter too. "Is there like a secret tunnel here or something?" Chandler gets angry and turns to Monica who has her face scrunched up as she is experiencing another contraction, "Hello we only have semi-private rooms" the lady at the front desk annouces. "Are you sure you don't have anymore private rooms" the gang ask, "No only semi-private rooms" the lady at the front desk replies. Monica is getting fed up so she says "Well I'm gonna go have a baby now" then feels a contraction and sits back down saying "Oh fine just give us the semi-private room"

[-]

Later on while Monica has been three centimeters for ten hours a couple enters. "Hello I am Nick and this is my wife Emely" the man interdouces himself and his wife, "Is this your first baby" Emely asks. C&M nod, "This is our forth. Our other three are called Eliza, Kaylee and Steven" Emely announced. Later on Nick has the curtain halfway open and Monica screams "Oooh oww. Ooh oww". Emely and Nick are in astonishment, and C&M look at them. Nick sits down and starts looking at the engaged couple who are having a baby girl, "Chandler-" Monica points at Nick staring at her. Chandler comes over to Nick and closes the curtain but Nick still keeps looking.

[-]

Twenty minutes later Chandler is talking to the gang in the waiting room, "And then this couple came in and the guy was staring at Mon while she was having Baby Girl Bing" he explains. "That's sick" Pheobe repiles.

[-]

Chandler enters back the labor room and asks "The Disgustingtons are gone, eh?". Monica sighs and nods "They had their baby and right before they left, Emely showed me little Zachary". Then he notices two new people are here "They have unsual petnames for each other such as Sick Bastard and Evil Bitch" she explains and later on Chandler closes the curtain but Sick Bastard keeps peaking. "Stop peeking on my fiancee" Chandler tells him off, "Don't talk to my husband like that you sick son of a Bitch" Evil Bitch yells at him.

[-]

A whole day later Monica is finally in the delivery room ready to have Baby Girl Bing, "Push!" the doctor instructs as she looks in Monica's hospital gown. Monica pushes very hard and hits Chandler in the head causing him to fall down, "Are you okay Mon Cherie" she questions. "Yes Cara Mia just fine" he replies and holds her legs up, then a little cry is heard. "It's a girl!" the doctor announces, "Oh my god honey I can't believe we are parents now" Chandler exclaims. "Got a name yet" the doctor questions the happy engaged couple, they shake their heads. "Then we'll just call her Baby Girl Geller" the doctor states, "No Baby Girl Bing" Monica states. And then Chandler starts to kiss her passionately.

 ** _Will be continued next chapter..._**

 ** _I could have made this longer but I was sleeping in my mom's room last night and she took my phone while while I was writing about this and now I have to go to school. Offically for the record I hate my history teacher Mrs. Maccftrey now. Ugh and my mom's being annoying checking to see if I'm ready for school by calling my name while I'm on it the couch..._**


	26. Baby Girl Bing

**A few hours later where C &M are all alone with newly born Baby Girl Bing. Chandler enters the room**

"Mon that was just your parents, they said they'll be here soon and my mom as well" he tells his fiancee.

"You know what Mon Cherie, I really miss being pregnant already" Monica admits and he sits on the bed with her kissing her neck.

"Hi Baby Girl, we love you so much. You look just like your Mommy" Chandler holds the baby embracing his newly found fatherhood,

"Excuse me? Am I not beautiful" Monica questions. "Yes Cara Mia you are and she looks just like you" he replies,the baby in fact looks like Monica's clone but has a mix of her and Chandler's eye color.

The gang then enter saying "Hi guys!" eyeing the baby, "Who's this gorgeous baby"? Joey questions.

"We haven't decided on a name yet so we are just calling her Baby Girl right now" Monica explains and rocks Baby Girl.

"Querida Mia the evening your parents left after telling them that we were expecting her. I thought of some names" Chandler says and then reveals the names he had in mind - "For girls Sophie, Karen, Julianne, Judith, Gabriella, Grace, Brianna, Elizabeth, Erlina, Leila, Rose, Alyssa, Violet, Gina, Galena, Brooke, and Madison" he says and continues saying "For boys Daniel, Jackson, Jonathan, Jacob, Logan, Liam, and Luke.

" Monica says "For one thing Baby Girl Bing looks like a Sophie or Julianne, what do you guys think"?. "Julianne's all princessy like -I like that" Rachel answers.

"Name her Sophie it means wisdom" Ross replies. "It's decided that her name is Sophie Rachel which means 'Wisdom lamb' C&M both explain.

"OAww thanks so much guys" Rachel says.

"Keep her name Baby Girl. I liked that more" Phoebe answers softy, then the Gellers and Nora enter to see their first grandbaby/grandaughter.

"Hi guys" the three say.

The three take turns holding the baby, "Oh my Monica she looks just like you as a baby" Judy says holdlng her first grandchild.

"Yes she does. Such a beautiful baby" Jack smiles and asks. "What's her name"?

"Meet Sophie Rachel Bing" Chandler smiles introducing his and Monica's newly born baby girl.

"What a beautiful name for our first granddaughter" the Gellers and Nora gush happily.

The beautiful baby's eyes move around at everybody in the room - her parents, grandparents, uncle and Joey, Phoebe and Rachel.

 ** _~Xoxoxoxo. Flashback when it was 1x02 where the Gellers are coming to the apartment and Monica is four months pregnant - she and Chandler was also going to them that they were going to have a baby.~_**

 ** _Monica emerges from the bedroom in the white blouse that she wore in the show._**

 ** _It's more then noticable that she and Chandler are having a baby since a tiny bump is there and especially because of the top she's wearing._**

 ** _"Hi Cara Mia is Baby Bing hurting you"? Chandler asks putting his hands on her waist and kissing her causing Ross to exclaim "Eww guys",_**

 ** _"Aww they love each other so much" Rachel replies._**

 ** _~Xoxoxoxo. 1x04 when the guys just got back from the hospital and the girls are playing Twister. Xoxoxoxo~_**

 ** _"Babe what are you doing. You are five months pregnant"? Chandler questions his fiancee who is on her toes playing Twister,_**

 ** _"Oh Mr. Safety rules lover. Ruining our fun just because she's carrying your baby" Phoebe mutters._**

 ** _"Mon Cherie I'm fine and Baby Bing is too" Monica answers looking at her fiance._**

 ** _~Xoxoxoxo. Flashback in 1x03 when the guys are telling Monica that Chandler smoked with Joey. Xoxoxoxo~_**

 ** _"Oh my god Chandler you are gonna get me and Baby Bing sick" Monica reacts to her fiance smoking,_**

 ** _"I'm so sorry Babe I'll go in the shower" Chandler answers and kisses her._**

 ** _"Don't go kissin' me while you smell like smoke" Monica replies._**

 ** _~Xoxoxoxo. Flashback in 1x01 when Monica is about to tell Chandler that they are going to be parents. Xoxoxoxo~_**

 _September 1994_

 ** _"Mon Cherie remember how I wasn't feeling good for a few weeks?"_** ** _Monica asks,_**

 ** _"Yes Babe is something wrong?" Chandler says._**

 ** _"Well I'm pregnant" she explains and expects him to walk out because he just found out he was going to be a father, but then a small smile appears on his face and kisses her hand._**

 ** _"_** ** _Mon I-I can't believe we are gonna be parents soon" Chandler exclaims and starts to spin Monica around kissing her very heated. This is possibly the happiest day of his life._**

 ** _"I love you Mon" Chandler said and placed his hand gently on her still flat belly where a noticeable bump was starting to grow. "And this little one too- our little Baby Bing. I'm so happy we get to screw it in our own way_** ** _"_**

 ** _"I love you too" Monica replied and placed her hand over his then continued "I want you to make love to me right now"_**

 ** _"I love you" Chandler grinned._**

 ** _Then he took her into her bedroom._**

 ** _After they go in, Chandler said "Mon, if anymore surprises come our way. That's okay because I love you and I can't wait until we become parents in a few months" then he started undressing her._**

 ** _Chandler added "You are my soulmate and I love you so much. I can't believe we are having a baby"_**

 ** _"You are the most wonderful fiance a girl can ever have" Monica answered._**

 ** _Chandler smiled warmly then proceeded to make love to her._**

 _TBC.._

 **STFM. :^)**


	27. Welcome Back Home

**This is in the place of 1x22**

Two days later Monica and the baby were able to come home. Right now her and Chandler were checking what they have to bring home.

"Diapers - check!, Baby bottles - check!, Formula - uh Mon Cherie do we have that?" Monica reads from a list.

"Yes Cara Mia we have everything" Chandler tells his fiancee and picks up the carseat.

She carries the stuff and they enterwine arms leaving the hospital without hesitation.

"Mon I love you and Sophie so much. She is as perfect as you" Chandler says when they enter the car.

"I love you so much too Chandler" Monica answers and they lean over the front dashboard kissing.

"Meeweee" they hear little beautiful Sophie Rachel Bing cry, and say "Let's go home".

While in M&R's apartment the other four have a surprise planned for the couple...

"I have the cake" Ross enters unveiling a rainbow cake, "I have the banner" Phoebe replies as she is taping a sign to the wall which reads "It's a boy!".

"Uh Pheebs why does it say 'It's a boy!' on it?" Rachel asks eyeing the sign, "They were out of 'It's a girl!' at the store. Joey hand me a marker" Phoebe explains. And Joey throws her a marker, which she crosses out 'Boy! and puts 'Girl!'.

Joey says "Gonna get the beers and chips' then runs across the hall, "I'm gonna order a few pizzas. Anyone of you want something special?" Rachel questions. "Yeah vegetarian pizza with a spiced sauce" Phoebe replies and replaces the blanket on the coffee table with a new one then adds ribbons to the chairs.

Ross then comments "Well this apartment lives up to 'Monica-clean' standards I believe' and places cupholders on the surfaces.

And hour later where everybody is there and C&M are outside

"This is our life now Mon. I love you with all my heart" Chandler says and puts Monica's hands into his kissing her hand. He kisses her and as they are kissing, the door opens and everybody yells 'SURPRISE. WELCOME HOME".

C&M get freaked out and almost drop the carseat in which the baby is in there. "Oh my god you all scared the crap out of us" Monica gasps, "What is all this?" Chandler questions while kissing Monica's neck.

Rachel explains "Well we decided to throw you a little surprise party" and adds "And Mon you and Ross' parents are here too", Monica groans "Ohh god" then her and Chandler go to put the baby to sleep.

While at the party, music is playing and Chandler takes Monica's hands into his spinning her around then dip kissing her. Causing Ross to exclaim "Eww guys!" drunkenly while filling up on pure vodka.

C&M then break away from their kiss and her parents approach them giving her a loving hug. "We can't believe you did it. We are so proud of you" they say, then her dad says "Sophie is absolutely the most beautiful thing we've set our eyes on" and her mom answers "Yes she is and you will always be our little girl" with a smile on her face as she squeezes her daughter.

Later on it is night time but everybody is all still there. A little cry can be heard from Rachel's room, Monica says "Someone is grouchy" then comes back a minute later with the baby in her arms.

She questions the guests, "Wanna meet the baby?".

There are a lot of 'Oohs and 'ahs', Chandler comes over to his and Monica's baby girl and says in a baby voice "Hi Baby Girl. Daddy's here". He still likes to refer Sophie as 'Baby Girl Bing' as that is what everybody would call her before she was born after they found out the gender.

"What beautiful people you and your Mama are" Chandler holds the baby's fist kissing it and then starting to kiss Monica's neck. Ross screams "Eeeeeww Guuuyyyss!", "Aww they love each other so much" Rachel gushes.

 _ **STFM :^)**_


	28. Baby Crying

Now it's two months later where the girls are sitting down doing nothing.(Carol had Ben and Ross is at China for a bone thing)

"Do you think I should wake up the Baby?" Monica asks longing for her daughter.

"No you never should wake up a sleeping baby" Phoebe looks in a baby book.

"Well me and Chandler made her" Monica stated stubbornly and goes into Rachel and the Baby's room

"Ahh she doesn't listen to us." Rachel knows what her blonde haired friend is thinking.

A few minutes later where Monica emerges back with little Sophie Rachel Bing in her arms.

Sophie is wearing a pink onesie that says 'I am beautiful like my Mama' and has a full head of raven black hair.

"Oh my Mon she's so gorgeous" Rachel exclaims. The baby then lets out a loud cry reacting to getting woken up by her mother.

"Baby Girl don't cry. Mama's here" Monica rocks the baby saying that in a soothing voice then asks "What have I done. She won't stop crying?!"

Phoebe flashes a 'Told you so' look causing Monica to stick her tounge at her.

Monica then tried to shush the baby but then hands the baby over to Rachel and the baby stopped crying.

"Oh look I'm super aunt"

A smile forms over Monica's face and nods saying "Yes yes you are" and adds "I'm gonna go scream in a pillow".

Phoebe goes in there too leaving Rachel with the baby. Rachel moves the blanket away and says "you are such a cute little baby" but then says in disgust "Hey no spitting up on me".

An hour later R&P went out for a while.

Chandler enters and kisses his fiancee's hand. "Hey Babe and little princess Sophie", "Hi Mon Cherie" Monica answers then her fiance does the ultimate picking up the baby. Monica exclaims "No don't do that!", but then Sophie starts crying again. "Want me to get that" Chandler questions and Monica snaps her fingers where Rachel comes back from the coffee house tending to the baby.

The next evening it is Rachel's birthday

"We've got buns" Monica reads, "And the flesh of formerly cute cows" Phoebe gave out a slight groan. "We make fire. We men" Joey says in a Neanderthal way, "And we put out the fire by peeing. No get invited back" Chandler retorts. "Honey that's not a good example to set for our daughter" Monica lectured him.

Later on Rachel received Ross' pin..

"Oh my this is so beautiful it looks just like my grandmother's" Rachel admires it, "Rachel Ross loves you dearly" Chandler tells her. The rest of the gang gasp, Rachel thinks for a moment then says "I- I love him too".

 **TBC...**

 _ **This is the last chapter that is of S1. STFM :^)**_


	29. I will always love you

It's now two months later where Chandler moved in with the girls and his and Monica's baby girl. Rachel is in the airport waiting for Ross...

Ross came out looking disappointed and spotted Rachel who said "Ross! I've missed you"

But then asked "What's wrong?". Ross tries to explain, "I met this girl named Julie but she ditched me for a red hair guy named Fry".

"I'm so sorry" Rachel says and embraces him, "I love you Rach" Ross answers.

"I know you do" Rachel replies then he kisses her but she doesn't pull away.

"Let's go home now. Ben wants to see his dada and Sophie wants to see her Uncle Ross" Ross grabs her hand leading her out of the airport.

Back at the apartment Ross and Rachel enter holding hands

"How'd it go?" Joey questions, "Pretty well I'm guessing" Chandler replies and kisses Monica's hand.

Sophie starts to cry from her and Rachel's room so Monica is about to get her but Chandler stops her by kissing her.

Ross exclaims "Eww guys!", "Shut up Dino man or no holding me and Mon's Baby Girl Bing" Chandler places the baby in his arms.

"How's my favoritei lil' niece" Ross asks the baby, and adds "There's no doubt her parents are you and Chandler Mon". "Well Chandler is the only person I've ever did it with so yeah" Monica answers.

Phoebe then says to the guys "Let's get you two boys haircuts", "No I don't want one" Joey complains. "Yeah why do we have to get one" Chandler asks and places the baby in Rachel's arms. "Come on hun you are so sexy and the haircut will only make you even more" Monica caresses his chest, "Okay but only if you go in the sack with me tonight" Chandler comprised. "Eww guys! Big brother in the room" Ross whines grossed out.

A few hours later Pheobe enters with the guys and R&R are watching TV while Monica is feeding the baby a bottle.

"Oh you two got haircuts" she says as the baby's deep blue eyes peer at her. "Say hello to Vidal Buffay. She says she likes you all" Phoebe jokes, "See hun you are even more sexy now" Monica puts down to bottle and kisses her fiance standing on her tippy toes with the baby in her arms. But then says "My turn" and hands the baby to Chandler. He kisses the baby's forehead and grins in a fatherly manner.

M&P are in the bedroom

"I want my hair to be a bit longer in the back. No alterations to the back" Monica instructs her, after giving birth - she regained her figure quite fast. "Oohkay" Phoebe replies and does what her friend desires. A few minutes later Monica's hair looked quite beautiful but generally similar to the hairstyle she had earlier that day.

That evening Monica entered the bedroom after leaving Rachel and the Baby's room.(Due to the apartment size they have to share a room)

She then sees Chandler on the bed with his legs crossed. He takes her hands and throws her on bed kissing her. "I will always love you Cara Mia" Chandler says and undresses her, "I will always love you too Mon Cherie" Monica answers and then he rolls on her.

 ** _STFM :^)_**


	30. Get a room!

**Sorry for the delay on this story. I was busy.**

A few days later the gang and the Lesbian lovers are all there with Ben. "Dada Dada" Sophie cries crawling to Chandler, and he says "My beautiful Baby Girl Bing. You look so much like your mama but that's okay she's such a pretty woman". "You bet I am" Monica comes over to them and he wraps his arms around her kissing her. "Eww guys!" Ross exclaims while holding Ben, "Aww you two love each other so much. So cute!" Carol gushes. Monica then gets a bottle of milk out of the fridge and puts it in Sophie's mouth saying "Here Baby Girl Mama's got some milk for you. Mhmm" but then Chandler squirts some on his arm. "Eww Dude. Why are you drinking the milk that comes out of my sister?" Ross questions him in disgust, "Shut up Dino Man your sister is my fiancee and this is for our daughter. You and Susan drink Carol's milk too" Chandler fires in annoyance. "Hey you bitch. Shut the hell up" Ross shot back, "Daddies stop fighting" Carol and Monica both say.

 **FLASHBACK THE NIGHT MONICA EXPERIENCED FALSE LABOR THE 2RD TIME(read chapter 20 &21). SHE AND CHANDLER ARE LAYING IN BED(he hasn't moved in with her and Rachel just yet)**

 _ **"Babe you okay" Chandler asks his pregnant fiancee, "Yes Mon Cherie I'm fine" Monica looks at the window trying not to cry. "Mon I love you and Baby Girl so so much. I'm sure she will look just like you" he declares, "I love you so so much too" she answers. But she continues to cry, "Baby just tell me what's wrong" he cupps her face in his hands. "I'm just nervous I mean I went into false labor again tonight. I want you to feel me up right now" Monica admits, "Mhmm ok" Chandler repiles. Then he slides off her brown jacket throwing it across the room and moves the black shirt around so that it comes off her. Then unhooks her bra, but halfway through he questions "Mon you wanna do this? I don't wanna hurt you two". Chandler puts his hand on her belly and sighs; this is one of the first times they did it since she's hit her ninth month and he doesn't want to do anything to hurt her and the baby. "I wanna do it. Just make love to me and make me feel beautiful again" Monica smiles and he takes off the rest of her clothes then rolls on her.  
**_

Later on Joey's at a cologne shop trying to get an audition there but then he asks the lady "Got any acting jobs?" he tries not to flirt since he's secretly dating Phoebe. "No I'm sorry I don't but talk to the hombrè guy. He might let you work with him" the lady puts her head on the desk then Joey walks away to see the guy wearing a worn out sombre and sniffing girly perfume.

Back at the apartment where everybody is still there. C&M are kissing causing Ross to exclaim "Eww guys!" then adds "Can you two please stop kissing in front of us?!". "Ugh Ross they are so in love" Rachel answers in astonishment. "It's late afternoon. Baby Girl Bing needs to eat now" Monica unbuttons her shirt and gets a blanket covered on her, Ross and Joey look really grossed out. They go over in the kitchen with Chandler and Ross asks "Can you ask my sister to stop feeding your daughter like that in front of us", "Hey me and Mon's Baby Girl Bing is getting fed now and she's just switching over to bottles now" Chandler explains.

That evening in C&M's room Monkca enters after leaving Rachel and the Baby's room.

Chandler is sleeping but then she undresses quietly in the dark and climbs in with him. "Weird day. Huh?" he asks sucking the bare skin on her neck, "Mmm" she nods and then he goes on her.

TBC...

 **I felt like this is a good stopping point for this chapter, sorry. But the next chapter will be up very soon :^)**


	31. Chapter 31

**I'm really sorry about the delay on this story. And I'm just gonna make this a chapter of flashbacks; sorry guys.**

 _Flashback from 1x13(chapter 8) right after Roger insulted Monica about her weight and her and Chandler's daughter._

 ** _"Well I gotta go now. Remember Mon, you need to lay off the sweets. They made you pretty fat and are not love" Roger says looking at Monica's large baby bump._**

 ** _Phoebe and Roger leave but he keeps on staring at Monica,_**

 ** _'Won't you leave, she's nine months pregnant, not fat? Phoebe get Roger to stop looking at Mon" Joey and Rachel say the first part, looking at Monica then they slam the door on Roger._**

 ** _The Geller siblings then throw cookies at Roger when he is leaving, "I hate that little fuck. He insulted our Baby Girl Bing, didn't you see Chandler?" Monica cries in distress._**

 ** _"Yes I saw Mon Babe, I love you and Baby Girl so so much. Don't listen to Roger, you are nine months pregnant with our daughter; not fat. You are so beautiful with a bump" Chandler answers and held Monica close to him kissing her neck._**

 ** _"Roger's a_** **Sociopath _" Ross grumbled and handed his pregnant sister a cookie. Monica gave him a thumbs up as she snarfed it down._**

 _ **"Eww stay clear of batch 18!" Rachel groaned eating a cookie.**_

 _ **Due to her pregnancy, Monica has started making food with out-of-this world ingredients: food combinations that nobody in their right minds would eat.**_

 _ **"Batch 13 + 17 are the worst!" Joey stated covering his mouth and running to the bathroom to throw up.**_

 _[Flashback of 1x8 after Ross has painkillers at the funeral.]_

 _November 1994(The one where Nana dies twice)_

 _ **"There's my sister!" Ross exclaimed and sluggishly walks over to Monica.**_

 _ **He gave her a great big hug and said "I love my sister and her unborn baby that she's having with my college ex-roomate"**_

 _ **Ross gives Chandler a great big hug also and said** **"I love you too man and especially for knockin' up Mon. For a second there after you and Mon started to date in late '88, I thought you were gay"**_

 _ **Chandler flashed him a 'Kill me now' look as Monica wrapped her arms around him saying "Baby Bing wants it's daddy."**_

 _ **He placed his hand gently on her large belly and kissed her. Then little Baby Bing started kicking away because its daddy got it's mommy all in lovey dovey mode.**_

 _ **"Hey, little kicky, are you hurting Mommy?" Chandler spoke to the baby.**_

 ** _Monica giggled and kissed him happily._**

 _ **"Lovebirds!" Rachel squealed in delight.**_

 _ **"Eww guys!" Ross exclaimed in his woozy state.**_

 _ **"Aww, they are so in love! I love you two together. Right Joey?" Phoebe gushed dreamily looking at Mondler.**_

 _ **"Yeah, sure." Joey agreed and looked at Phoebe asking "How you doin?'"**_

 ** _Phoebe laughed at her secret crush._**

 ** _Chandler & Monica broke away from their kiss, to stare at the other four._**

 _[Flashback a few minutes later when Monica is talking with her mother away from the guests.]_

 _ **"Oh darling me and your father are so proud that you and Chandler are having a baby soon" Judy plays with her daughter's hair, "I know that Mom" Monica smiled.**_

 _ **"Do you know what it's like to live with someone whose's always critical of whatever you do?" Judy changes the subject, "I can see that Mom" Monica rolled her eyes.**_

 _ **"I mean 24/7. If Nana were alive, she'd be asking why we don't have the honeyglazed ham and why her flowers aren't a bright yellow" Judy said.**_

 _ **Then added "And that made your mother into the life affirming person she is now" patting her daughter's large belly, cooing "Baby Bing's so lucky to have all these people dot over it before it comes into the world soon" with a smile on her face.**_

 _ **"Me and Chandler are so lucky to have a ton of people dot over our baby even before it's born" Monica leans over to chair for support to get up as much as an almost seven month pregnant woman can.**_

 _[At the gravesite a few minutes before Ross fell into the empty grave.]_

 _ **"Sweetheart, pregnancy has really made you glowing and you look so beautiful" Judy moves the hair away from her daughter's face and continues "I think you need to start wearing night cream"**_

 _ **"Thank you Mom" Monica replied as she waddles her large figure; a result of pregnancy.**_

 _ **Joey is watching the game as they walk, Chandler comes up to him asking "Dude what the hell are you doing?"**_

 _ **"Sssh Dude. This is half time" Joey explained stuffing the portable device back into his coat pocket.**_

 _ **Ross shouted down Nana's empty grave "Bye Nana" but not before falling into the open grave.**_

 _TBC..._

 **I wanted to do this for a few days but didn't have the guts until now. As always reviewing is free! :^)**


	32. Earthy

**Sorry guys but I have decided to skip to 2x04 bc 2x03 was too hard to writ. So a lovely reviewer did 2x04 &5 for me. Thanx you, you rock!**

 **Long story short: Rachel has found out Joey and Phoebe are dating and had to keep it a secret.**

**Earthy**

 _Act one..._

A few days later at Phoebe and Rachel's apartment, Phoebe is currently sitting on the couch, locked in a passionate embrace with Joey. The two secret lovers were so caught up in their make-out session that they didn't notice the door to the apartment open, leading to Rachel walking in on them.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey! None of that, not while you're under my roof!" Rachel barked at Phoebe and Joey causing them to break away from their passionate embrace.

"What?!" Joey incredulously asked.

"Look, just because I know about you two now doesn't mean I like looking at it," Rachel explained while giving them the stink eye.

"Aren't you supposed to be at with Ross over at his place right now?" Phoebe asked.

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry I didn't think to bring an extra pair of clothes with me for my first night over at my boyfriend's apartment," Rachel retorted. "And I'm also sorry that I didn't think to bring my own shower stuff with me for my first night over either. Okay look, if I have to pretend that I don't know about you two then you two are gonna have to pretend that there's nothing to know about; that means no subtle looks at each other, no saying something the other person would say, no seemingly inappropriate touching no matter how innocent it may look, and most definitely no making out on MY sofa, are we clear?"

"Yeah," Phoebe and Joey reluctantly complied simultaneously.

"Sorry," Phoebe apologized.

"Sorry," Joey apologized.

"Good," Rachel said as she made her way to her bedroom, giving one more warning glare at the secret lovers before disappearing into her room.

Phoebe and Joey waited for Rachel to finally close the door to her room and then started making out again.

"I can hear that!" Rachel yelled from her bedroom.

"Let's go to my place," Joey suggested.

"Yes, let's," Phoebe happily agreed.

With that, the secret lovers exited the apartment, making their way to Joey's apartment.

There was a brief pause inside Phoebe and Rachel's apartment until Rachel finally yelled out, "I can still hear you!"

Later that day at Chandler and Monica's apartment, everyone but Monica is there. Ross is currently on the phone.

"Yeah, yeah, everybody's here," Ross said into the phone. He then turned to everybody and said, "Hey, everybody, say hi to little Sophie at my parents' house."

"Hi, Sophie!" Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel all said.

"Hi, baby girl! Don't cause any trouble at Grandma and grandpa's house, y'hear?" Chandler hollered in his usual lovable fatherly tone. He then turned to Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel and silently announced, "Okay, while Ross is on the phone, everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday," earning wide-eyed, incredulous looks from all three of them.

"Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? Y'know, like from, like 20?" Phoebe asked.

"Hey, come on, we got the gift, the concert, and the cake," Chandler insisted.

"Do we need a cake?" Joey asked, earning a look from Hell from both Chandler and Rachel.

"Look guys, I know it's a little steep..." Chandler started to say.

"Yeah, whoosh!" Rachel interjected, imitating going over a cliff with her hand.

"... but it's Ross," Chandler finished.

The other three couldn't bring themselves to argue with that so they just reluctantly agreed.

"All right, okay, I'll see ya guys later; gotta head into work."

With that, Chandler exited the apartment, with Ross not too far behind.

"Okay, Mom, I'll call you later tonight," Ross said as he hung up the phone. He then turned to the other three friends and said, "See ya later, guys! Bye, sweetie!"

"Later!" Joey and Phoebe simply said.

"Bye, sweetie!" Rachel said.

Now Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are alone in the apartment.

"So uh, what are you guys doing for dinner tonight?" Rachel asked as she hopped off the arm rest of the chair onto the sofa, grabbing a small pillow in the process.

"Well I guess I gotta start saving up for Ross' birthday, so I guess I'll just stay home and eat dust bunnies," Joey retorted.

"Can you believe how much this is gonna cost?" Phoebe asked.

"Do you guys ever get the feeling that um, Chandler and those guys just don't get that we don't make as much money as they do?" Rachel asked.

"Yes! Yes," Joey replied. "Yeah, it's like they're always saying 'let's go here, let's go there'. Like we can afford to go here and there."

"Yes, yes, and it's, and we always have to go to, y'know, someplace nice, y'know?" Phoebe added. "God, and it's not like we can say anything about it, 'cause, like this birthday thing, it's for Ross."

"For Ross," Joey copied.

"For Ross," Rachel also copied.

Just then, Monica entered the apartment, extremely pleased with herself.

"Oh my god!"

"Hey," Phoebe greeted.

"Hi," Joey greeted.

"What?" Rachel asked in response to Monica's exclamation.

"I'm at work, just an ordinary day, you know, chop, chop, chop, saute, saute, saute," Monica began to explain. "All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job."

"If it's not you, this is a horrible story," Joey dumbly said, earning a pillow lashing from Rachel.

"Fortunately, it is me," Monica retorted. "And, they made me head of purchasing, thank you very much." Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are all happy for her. "Anyway, I just ran into Ross and Chandler downstairs, and they think we should go out and celebrate, y'know, someplace nice."

The three friends all hardened their smiles the moment that was said as the oblivious Monica brightly skipped into her's and Chandler's bedroom.

"Yeah, someplace nice," Joey repeated to Rachel and Phoebe.

"Yeah!" Rachel and Phoebe conquered with hardened smiles.

"How much do you think I can get for my kidney?" Joey asked Phoebe.

That night, the whole group are seated at table at a nice restaurant as their waiter approached them.

"Are we ready to order?" the waiter asked.

"Oh, you know what, we haven't even looked yet," Rachel chuckled sheepishly.

"Well, when you do, just let me know; I'll be right over there on the edge of my seat," the waiter deadpanned as he walked off, leaving the six friends to pull weird faces about him.

"Okay..." Chandler clinked his glass to make a toast but there's a napkin in the glass; needless to say, it sounds weird, so he took the napkin out of the glass and clinked it again.

"Okay..." Chandler started as he held up his glass. "...okay, here's to my fiancee, the mother of my child, the newly-appointed head lunch chef..."

"Who is also in charge of purchasing," Monica interrupted.

"...newly appointed head lunch chef who is also in charge of purchasing..." Chandler tried to continue.

"Who has her own little desk when Roland's not there," Monica interrupted again.

"Uh, lunch chef, purchasing, own little desk when Roland's not there," Chandler muttered, trying to keep up. "Here's to the love of my life-"

"Oh, wait, and I got a beeper!" Monica again interrupted as she pulled a beeper up from her lap.

The others were so impressed that she handed the beeper over to them so they could take a look.

"That's fine, I'll-I'll just wait," Chandler sulked.

"Oh, sorry," the others all apologized, especially Monica, as they all held their glasses up again for the toast.

"Monica!" Chandler simply said, giving up on doing the full toast.

The whole group clinked their glasses together as Chandler and Monica proceeded to kiss.

"Eww, guys, come on! I'd still like to have my dinner, y'know!" Ross exclaimed in disgust.

"Aw, don't listen to Ross, you two lovebirds; he's just being Mr. Cranky Pants," Phoebe defended, earning Ross' patented "screw you" gesture.

"Y'know, I once dated a Miss Cranky Pants," Joey quipped. "Really hot girl, kinda moody."

With that, the group finally looked at the menus; Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel's eyes all grew wide as they saw the prices.

"Wow, look at these prices!" Phoebe sotto exclaimed to Joey and Rachel.

"Yeah, these are pretty cha-ching," Rachel deadpanned.

"I know. What are these, like famous chickens?" Joey added.

Finally, the waiter came back to take their order.

"Do I dare ask?" The waiter asked.

"Yes, I will start with the carpaccio, and then I'll have the grilled prawns," Monica replied.

"That sounds great, same for me," Ross said as he handed the waiter his and Monica's menus.

The waiter then turned to Joey and asked, "And for the gentleman?"

"Yeah, I'll have the Thai chicken pizza," Joey ordered. He then asked, "But, hey, look, if I get it without the nuts and leeks and stuff, is it cheaper?"

"You'd think, wouldn't you?" the waiter retorted as he took Joey's menu. He then turned to Rachel and asked, "Miss?"

"Okay, I will have the uh, side salad," Rachel ordered, whispering the "side salad" part as she handed her menu to the waiter.

"And what will that be on the side of?" the waiter whispered back in kind as he took the menu.

"Uh, I don't know. Why don't you put it right here next to my water?" Rachel politely suggested.

The waiter then turned to Phoebe and asked, "And for you?"

"Um, I'm gonna have a cup of the cucumber soup," Phoebe ordered. "And, um..." she paused for a brief moment before finally saying, "...take care" as she handed her menu to the waiter, earning an eye roll from said waiter.

"I will have the uh, Cajun catfish," Chandler ordered.

"Anything else?" the waiter asked.

"Yes, how about a verse of 'Killing Me Softly'?" Chandler jokingly asked, earning a look from Hell fro the waiter. "You're gonna sneeze on my fish aren't ya?"

The waiter did not dignify that with an answer as he took Chandler's menu and went on his merry way.

Time lapse, everyone has finished dinner and Ross is figuring out the bill.

"Whoa! Does anybody feel like they just gave birth to an alien?" Chandler asked.

"Yeah!" Ross and Monica replied with enthusiasm.

"No," Rachel, Phoebe and Joey replied without enthusiasm.

"Plus tip, divided by six," Ross muttered to himself while using a calculator. "And, everyone owes 28 bucks."

"Okay," Chandler and Monica said as they went for their wallets to pay for the dinner, while Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey all went wide-eyed.

"Wha-wha- everyone?" Rachel incredulously asked.

"Yea- oh, you're right, I'm sorry," Ross said.

"Thank you," Joey said to Rachel as they and Phoebe slumped in relief.

Unfortunately for them, Ross completely misunderstood what Rachel asked for he immediately said, "It's Monica's big night, she shouldn't pay. "

"Aw, thank you!" Monica exclaimed as Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are now becoming frustrated.

"So five of us is $33.50 apiece," Ross stated.

"No, uh-uh, no way, I'm sorry, not gonna happen," Phoebe finally snapped.

"Whoa, whoa, prom night flashback," Chandler exclaimed.

"I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No!" Phoebe finally began to vent. "Rachel just had that-that-that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just... "

"Okay, Pheebs! How 'bout we'll each just pay for what we had? It's no big deal," Ross suggested.

"Not for you," Phoebe scoffed.

"All right, what's going on?" Monica asked.

Rachel turned to Phoebe and Joey and said, "Okay, look you guys, I really don't want to get into this right now; I think it'll just make everyone uncomfortable."

Joey and Phoebe readily agreed.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you can tell us," Chandler said.

"Hello, it's us, all right? It'll be fine," Ross added.

"Yeah," Monica added.

Rachel, Phoebe and Joey just sat there awkwardly for a few seconds until Joey finally cleared his throat.

"Ok, um, uh, we three feel like, that uh, sometimes you guys don't get that uh... we don't make as much money as you," Joey explained while clearing his throat a lot and shifting uncomfortably in his chair.

Just as Rachel suspected, Chandler and the Gellers became uncomfortable upon hearing this news.

"Okay," Monica uncomfortably said.

"I hear ya," Ross uncomfortably said.

"We can talk about that," Chandler uncomfortably said.

"Well, then... let's," Phoebe said.

"Well umm I, I just never think of money as an issue," Ross explained.

"That's 'cause you have it," Rachel pointed out.

"That's a good point," Ross nonchalantly replied.

"So um, how come you guys haven't talked about this before?" Chandler asked.

"'Cause it's always something, y'know..." Joey explained. "...like with Monica's new job, or the whole Ross' birthday hoopla."

"Wha- Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative- there's gonna be a hoopla?" Ross interjected, causing joey to roll his eyes and facepalm.

"Basically, there's the thing, and then there's the stuff after the thing," Rachel explained.

"If it makes anybody feel better, then we can just forget the thing, and we'll just do the gift," Monica suggested.

"G-gift? The thing's not the gift?" Ross asked.

"No, the thing was we were gonna go see Hootie & the Blowfish," Chandler explained.

"Hootie & the- oh my. I, I can catch them on the radio," Ross pitifully tried to hide his excitement.

"No, now I feel bad; you wanna go to the concert," Phoebe said.

"No, look, hey, it's my birthday, and the important thing is that we all be together," Ross stated.

"All of us," Monica added.

"Together," Chandler added.

"Not at the concert," Ross added.

"Okay," Rachel uncomfortably said.

"Yeah," Joey uncomfortably said.

"Thank you," Rachel said.

"Thanks," Joey said.

"Yeah," Phoebe said.

An awkward silence ensued among the group.

Chandler tried to diffuse the awkwardness by saying, "So, the Ebola virus; that's gotta suck, huh?"

It went over like a fart in Church.

 _Act two..._

The next day at Chandler and Monica's apartment, Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting in the living room as Monica, who's holding a bag, Ross, and Chandler stand before them.

"Gee, Monica, what's in the bag?" Chandler asked in an oh so dorky manner.

"I don't know, Chandler. Let's take a look," Monica replied, equally dorky.

"Oh, it's like a skit," Phoebe stated, pointing out the blindingly obvious.

"Why, it's dinner for six," Monica revealed as she pulled the items from the bag. "Five steaks, and an eggplant for Phoebe." She then thankfully dropped the dorky manner as she explained, "Yeah, we switched meat suppliers at work, and the new guys gave me the steaks as sort of a thank you."

"But wait, there's more," Ross stated, also in the same dorky manner as Chandler and Monica earlier. "Hey, Chandler, what is in the envelope?"

On cue, Chandler pulled an envelope from behind his back and prepared to open, but not before turning to Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel and saying with all seriousness, "By the way, this didn't seem so dorky out in the hall."

"Come on," Ross commanded, wanting Chandler to get on with it.

Chandler finally opened the envelope and pulled out concert tickets. He then put the dork mode back on while exclaiming, "Why, it's six tickets to Hootie & the Blowfish!" Joey, Phoebe and Rachel's faces all dropped upon hearing this. "The Blowfish!" Chandler tried again, attempting to get an excited reaction from the three friends to no avail.

"It's on us, all right; so don't worry, it's our treat," Monica explained.

"So... thank you," Phoebe deadpanned.

"Could you be less enthused?" Ross asked.

"Look, it's a nice gesture, it is," Joey explained. "But it just feels like..."

"Like?" Monica asked.

"Charity," Joey finished.

"Charity?" Monica incredulously asked.

"We're just- we're just trying to do a nice thing here," Ross stated.

"Yeah but, Ross, you have to understand that your nice thing makes us feel about this big," Rachel explained while holding her thumb and forefinger a relatively short distance apart.

"Actually, it makes us feel that big," Phoebe corrected as she squeezed Rachel's thumb and forefinger closer together until they're barely an inch apart.

Ross, Monica, and Chandler couldn't believe what they were hearing here.

"I don't, I don't understand. I mean, you, it's like we can't win with you guys," Ross said.

"Yeah, I mean if you guys feel this big, maybe that's not our fault; maybe that's just how you feel," Chandler added while imitating Rachel's gesture.

"Oh, now you're telling us how we feel," an insulted Joey stated as he leapt to his feet from the sofa.

"God, see, okay, we never should've talked about this," Rachel said as she leapt up to her feet from the chair and began walking into the kitchen.

"All right, I'm just gonna pass on the concert, 'cause I'm just not in a very Hootie place right now," Phoebe said as she proceeded to accompany Rachel into the kitchen.

"Me neither," Rachel concurred.

"Me too," Joey, who is also in the kitchen with Phoebe and Rachel, also concurred.

"Guys, we bought the tickets," Monica stated.

"Oh, well, then you'll have extra seats y'know, for all your tiaras and stuff," Phoebe retorted.

"Why did you look at me when you said that?" Chandler asked, earning an eye roll from Phoebe.

"So, I guess now we can't go," Monica said to her fiancee and brother.

"What? Come on, you do what you want to do. Do we always have to do everything together?" Rachel suggested.

"You know what? You're right," Monica angrily decided.

"Fine!" Phoebe angrily concurred.

"Fine!" Ross fired back as he started to leave.

"Fine!" Joey fired back.

"Fine!" Chandler fired back as he and Monica proceeded to follow Ross out of the apartment.

"Fine!" Rachel fired back.

"All right. We're gonna go" Monica fired back as she exited the apartment, leaving Joey, Phoebe and Rachel alone with each other. Just then, the door opened and Chandler and Monica both came back in saying, "It's not for another six hours; we're gonna go then," and then power walked to their bedroom.

That night at the concert, Ross, Monica, and Chandler are sitting in their seats looking at the three empty ones.

"You know what? I'm not gonna be able to enjoy this," Monica stated sadly.

"Yeah, I know, it's my birthday; we all should be here," Ross sadly concurred.

"So let's go," Chandler suggested.

They got up and started to leave, but unfortunately, just as they were starting to leave, the lights dimmed and the band started to play.

"Well maybe, you know, maybe we should stay for one song," Ross suggested.

"Yeah, I mean, it would be rude to them (the band) for us to leave now," Chandler concurred.

"You know, the guys are probably having a great time," Monica concluded.

Meanwhile, at Phoebe and Rachel's apartment, Joey is trying to entertain Phoebe and Rachel.

"Come on you guys, one more time," Joey pleaded while holding his right hand behind his back.

"Okay," a bored Phoebe replied. "One."

"Nooo," Joey excitedly replied as he brought out his hand and held up two fingers.  
"Ugh! All right, that's it! I've had enough of this!" Rachel snapped as she leapt up to her feet from the sofa. "Both of you, make out on the couch right now!"

Phoebe and Joey looked at Rachel like she just grew two heads.

"What'd you say?" Phoebe asked.

"You heard what I said! I want the both of you making out on the couch right now!"

"But, but, what about all those ground rules you set for us?" Joey asked.

"Well, I hereby rescind one of those ground rules. You guys can make out on my sofa as much as you want; just don't anything beyond that and do NOT let anyone who isn't me see you doing it, y'hear?"

Phoebe and Joey looked at each other for a split second then back at Rachel before finally agreeing, "We hear ya."

"Good. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to bed now."

"Okay, goodnight, Rach!" Joey said.

"'Night, Rachel!" Phoebe said.

"'Night!" Rachel replied as she disappeared into her bedroom.

With Rachel finally gone, Phoebe and Joey looked at each other happily.

"Oh my God, I can't believe that actually worked!" Phoebe silently exclaimed to her lover.

"See? Told ya, not just a hat rack, my friend," Joey proudly gloated while pointing to his head.

With that, the secret lovers locked into a passionate embrace as they made their way to the sofa.

Meanwhile, back the concert, the show has ended and everyone is starting to leave.

"That was amazing!" Monica exclaimed happily.

"Excellent, absolutely excellent," Ross concurred.

"I can't believe the guys missed this," Chandler stated.

"What guys?" Ross abruptly asked, but then he quickly remembered. "Oh, yeah."

Finally, the three turned to leave - for real this time - when a young man suddenly approached Monica.

"Excuse me, you're Monica Geller aren't you?" the young man asked.

"Do I know you?" Monica asked.

"You used to be my babysitter," the young man explained.

Monica immediately remembered, "Oh my god, little Stevie Fisher? How've you been?"

"Good, good, I'm a lawyer now," Stevie replied.

"You can't be a lawyer; you're eight," Monica said to the obviously no longer eight year old Stevie.

"Listen, it was nice to see you. I gotta run backstage," Stevie said as he turned to leave.

"Uh, wait, backstage?" Monica asked before Stevie could take off.

"Oh, yeah, my firm represents the band," Stevie explained.

"Ross," Ross introduced himself.

"Chandler," Chandler introduced himself.

"How are ya?" Stevie asked as he shook Ross and Chandler's hands

Monica rolled her eyes at her brother and fiancee before saying, "Yeah, this is my older brother Ross and that's my fiancee, Chandler Bing."

"Oh, wow, you're engaged?" Stevie asked, surprised by the news.

"Yep, going on four years now," Monica proudly said. "Livin' together and everything."

"Well, that's great! Hope you invite me to the wedding."

"Will do, Stevie!"

"Great, thanks. So, you guys wanna meet the group?"

They all said, "Yeah!"

"Come on," Stevie said as he proceeded to lead Mondler and Ross backstage. He then turned to Monica and asked, "So, tell me, are you one of the ones who fooled around with my dad?"

Monica scrunched up her face and grimaced in disgust upon hearing that question.

The next morning at the coffee house, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there as Ross, Monica, and Chandler entered.

"Hey, you guys," Ross greeted.

"Happy Birthday, sweetie," Rachel said as she hugged her boyfriend and gave him a big kiss on the lips.

"Eww, guys!" Monica exclaimed in disgust. "This is a family place! Get a room!"

Ross ignored her and said, "thank you, sweetie, thanks. So uh, how was your night last night?"

"Oh, well, it pretty much sucked," Rachel explained. "How was yours?"

"Yeah, ours pretty much sucked too," Monica replied, lying through her teeth. "Oh, but, I did run into little Stevie Fisher; remember him?"

"Oh yeah. I used to babysit him," Rachel replied. "Hey, how's his dad?"

Monica slightly hesitated before answering, "Uh, good."

"Uh, aside from that, the whole evening was pretty much a bust," Ross lied.

"Yeah, we really missed you guys," Chandler half-truthfully explained.

"Yeah, look, we were just saying, this whole thing is so stupid," Joey said.

"We just have to really, really, really, not let stuff like money get..." Phoebe started to say until she noticed something off about Monica's clothes. "...did somebody sign your bra?"

Monica's eyes went wide as she realized her bra was nearly visible through her shirt so she tried to hide it and come up with a clever excuse but couldn't find one.

"Where'd you get the autograph, Mon?" Rachel asked.

"You know, a party, or..." Monica danced around the question.

"What party?" Phoebe prodded.

"Well, it wasn't so much a party as a...a gathering of people..." Ross explained as the truth slowly began to come out. "...with food, and music, and, and, and the band."

Rachel and Joey's eyes bulged when they heard that last part.

"You partied with Hootie & the Blowfish?!" Joey incredulously asked Chandler.

"Yes, apparently Stevie and Hootie are like this," Chandler replied as he held up crossed fingers.

"Who signed your bra?" Rachel asked Monica.

"That would be the work of a Blowfish," Monica reluctantly admitted, causing Rachel and Phoebe to gasp.

An outraged Phoebe leapt to her feet from the armchair and crossed over to the other side of the sofa while ranting, "I can't believe it. I can't believe this. We're just like, sitting at home, trying to guess Joey's fingers, and you guys are out like partying and having fun, and you know, all, 'Hey, Blowfish, sign my chest supporter'."

"Hey, look, don't blame us; you guys could have been there, you know," Ross pointed out defensively.

"Oh, what, as part of your poor friends outreach program?" Rachel fired back.

Monica's pager went off.

"Oh great, it's work," Monica muttered to herself. She then turned to Ross an asked, "Can I have the phone?"

Ross handed Monica the phone and Monica went over to the small table to make the call. Meanwhile, the argument about the money situation is still going on.

"I don't know what to say; I'm sorry that we make more money than you, but we're not gonna feel guilty about it; we work really hard for it," Chandler stated.

"And we don't work hard?" Joey fired back.

"Yeah, hi, it's Monica. I just got a page," Monica said into the phone.

"I'm just saying that sometimes we like to do stuff that costs a little more," Chandler explained.

"And you feel like we hold you back," Joey retorted.

"Yes," Chandler automatically replied, causing Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe to gape at him.

Chandler immediately realized what he said and tried to change his answer to "no" but to no avail as an argument ensued among the friends.

"Leon, Leon, wait," Monica said into the phone. She then turned to the others and said, "Shhh! Guys." causing them to quiet down. She then turned back to the phone and said, "Wait, I don't understand. Those steaks were just a gift from the meat vendor; that was not a kickback. I mean, come on, I'll just replace them and we can forget the whole thing." She then listened and asked, "What corporate policy?" She listened again. "No." She listened again and started to well up. "Yeah. Okay." She hung up and, on the brink of tears, said, "I just got fired."

All animosity completely forgotten, the others gathered around Monica to comfort her, especially Chandler.

"I'm sorry, honey. I'm so sorry," Chandler cooed as he held his fiancee close to him.

"What am I gonna do now? I can't be an unemployed mother living off her finacee's income. Please tell me Chandler, what am I gonna do now?"

"Don't worry, babe, we'll think of something. We've been in tighter spots than this before; we're gonna get through this one no problem, I promise."

"You're so wonderful. I love you."

"I love you too."

Just then, the waitress approached Monica with a muffin and a cup of coffee.

"Here's your check," the waitress said as she held out the check for Monica. "That'll be $4.12."

"I'll get that," Chandler said as he took the check. His eye brows went up as he looked at the check so he turned to Joey and whispered, "Hey, Joe, I'm actually a little shy; you got five bucks?"

Joey nodded with closed eyes and slipped his former roommate a fiver on the low-low as the rest of the group continued to comfort Monica.

 **Sorry this took so long guys!**


	33. Roses

**Okay guys, here is 2x05, also written by the lovely reviewer.**

 _ ****Roses****_

 _Act_ one...

The following week at Chandler and Monica's apartment, Chandler and Monica busy playing with "where's the baby?" little Sophie.

"Where's Baby Girl? There she is!" Monica cutely asked while holding a blanket up in front of their daughter and then dropping it. "Where's Baby Girl? There she is!"

"Awww! Y'know, that's probably why babies learn to talk, so they can tell the grown-ups to cut it out," Chandler remarked as he proceeded to place the little baby girl back into the crib.

Just as that was going on, there was a knock on the door.

"It's open, you guys!" Chandler and Monica hollered in the direction of the door.

The door opened and a blonde haired stranger who appeared to have bird poop on his head entered with flowers.

"Oh, hi, Monica," the stranger greeted.

"Duncan?" Monica asked, recognizing the stranger immediately. "What're you doing here?"

"I'm looking for Phoebe," Duncan replied. "Does she still live here?"

"Oh, no, she actually moved out last year," Monica replied.

"Ah, well can you get a message to her next time you see her?" Duncan asked as he left the flowers on the bar.

"Sure, we can," Chandler replied.

"Thanks. And you are...?"

"I'm Monica's fiancee, Chandler Bing," Chandler replied as he shook Duncan's hand. "And you..." he promptly stopped and grimaced his face as he noticed something off. "...smell like a bird wiped its ass with you."

"Oh, yeah, a pigeon took a dump on my head as I was walking in here. Sorry for that," Duncan explained and apologized.

"Eh, don't worry about it; we get horrible smells day in and day out around this place, don't we, Mon?"

"Yeah, we do at that," Monica deadpanned, unamused by her fiancee's quip.

"Well, anyway, as you were about to ask, I'm Phoebe's husband-"

"Her what?!" Chandler and Monica exclaimed simultaneously.

"Uh, yeah, didn't she tell ya?"

"Yes, yes, she did. Can't you tell by our shocked faces? These are totally the faces of people who're in the know!" Chandler sarcastically replied.

Later that day, the whole group are in the apartment now.

"This is unbelievable Pheebs, how can you be married?!" Joey exclaimed, trying to keep his real feelings about his secret girlfriend being married under wraps.

"Well, I mean, I'm not 'married' married, y'know," Phoebe explained. "He's just a friend and he's gay and he's just from Canada and he just needed a green card."

"I can't believe you married Duncan!" Monica exclaimed incredulously. "I mean how could you not tell me? We lived together; we told each other everything."

"I'm sorry Monica but I knew if I told you, you'd get really, like, judgmental and you would not approve," Phoebe explained.

"Of course I wouldn't approve, I mean, you were totally in love with this guy who - hello! - was gay! I mean, what the hell were you thinking?!"

"You see, and you thought she'd be judgmental," Rachel deadpanned.

"Okay, I wasn't in love with him; I was just helping out a friend," Phoebe insisted.

"Please, when he left town you stayed in your pajamas for a month and I saw you eat a cheeseburger," Monica fired back, causing everybody to gasp. "Well, didn't you?"

"I might've," Phoebe said.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me."

"Oh, c'mon, like you tell me everything."

"What have I not told you?"

"Oh, I don't know. Umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours from when you and Chandler were having sex out on the terrace."

Rachel, Joey, and Ross ran over to the window to look.

"Wait a minute, who told you?!" she then turned to her fiancee who was looking sheepish. "You are dead meat."

"It just came right out of the blue, sweetie; please don't kill me," Chandler tried to placate his fiancee. "Besides, I didn't know it was a big secret."

"Oh it's not big, not at all, y'know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don't know, having a third n***!"

Everyone came back from the window and surrounded Chandler with Ross hopping on the couch.

"You have a third nipple?!" Phoebe excitedly asked.

Chandler just gave his fiancee a hurt and betrayed glare before whining, "Hey! That was just supposed to be between us!"

"Whip it out, whip it out!" Ross excitedly commanded much to Chandler's mortification.

"Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!" Phoebe concurred.

Chandler ran into the living room, trying to get away from the others, while saying, "C'mon, there's nothing to see; it's just a tiny bump; it's totally useless."

"Oh, as opposed to your other multifunctional nipples?" Rachel deadpanned.

"I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin," Joey said in outrage, not knowing that the word "nubbin" actually means third nipple.

"Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?" Ross asked in disbelief.

"I don't know, you see something, you hear a word, I thought that's what it was," Joey replied. He then turned back to Chandler and said, "Let me see it again."

Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross all went over to Chandler, begging him to show the nubbin.

Realizing he has no other alternative, Chandler got out of this the only way he knew how, "Joey was in a porn movie!" Everybody gasped and looked at Joey, who now looked like he was about to murder Chandler. "If I'm going down, I'm taking everybody with me."

All the other friends ran over to Joey saying, "You were in a p***?"

Realizing he has no other alternative, Joey just decided to come clean, "Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, Okay? But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't 'cause there's people having sex on it."

"That is wild!" Phoebe exclaimed to her secret boyfriend as the others smiled proudly at him.

They all immediately turned back to Chandler, still not letting go of the whole nubbin thing.

"So what's it shaped like?" Ross asked.

"Yeah, is there hair on it?" Phoebe asked.

"What happens if you flick it?" Joey asked.

"Oh, God, he really, really likes it when I flick it in bed," Monica gushed while smiling perversely. "One time, I-"

"Stop talking, stop talking now!" Chandler barked at his fiancee in mortification.

"Yeah, Mon, we don't want to know what you guys do to each other's n*** in bed!" Ross exclaimed in disgust.

"What? Joey asked and I-"

"I withdraw the question," Joey said as he made his way to the bathroom to hurl.

Later that day at the coffee house, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.

"So, uh, does it do anything, you know, special?" Ross asked, still on about the whole third nipple thing.

"Why yes Ross, pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia," Chandler sarcastically replied.

"You know, this may sound rather shocking but I read somewhere that in some cultures having a third nipple is actually a sign of virility," Rachel stated. "Apparently, you get the best huts and women dance naked around you."

"Well, as appealing as that does sound to your boyfriend's best friend... and his fiancee..." Chandler started to say while looking over at Monica, who was flashing Rachel a very evil look from the small table, causing Rachel to almost jump in her spot with fear. "...I think I'll pass on seeing if any of these cultures are per chance in the tri-state area."

"Eh, that's alright; I can just paste a fake third nipple onto Joey and he can check on that, right, Joey?" Rachel asked.

"Uh, yeah, I'm gonna pass on that, too; I don't think my girlfriend would approve of that, either," Joey replied with a warning glare for Rachel that went unnoticed by the others.

"What girlf- Oh!" Rachel started to ask before it immediately came back to her and she smacked herself on the forehead for her stupidity. "Where is my head today? I completely forgot that you're going steady now with Ph- Regina."

"Wait, what?" the other three friends asked simultaneously.

"Joey has a steady girlfriend?" Monica asked in shock. "Since when?"

"Yeah, I've lived with the guy for about a year; he's looser with his women than he is with his money," Chandler stated.

"Hey, I'm sitting right here!" Joey hotly responded, knowing that it's disrespectful to refer to somebody in the third person while that person is right there. "And I resemble that remark!"

Nobody bothered to correct him as a chagrined Ross began to apologize, "Sorry, Joe; it's just that in all the time we've know you, you've never truly had a steady girlfriend, so just now hearing that you do is really shocking to us."

"Hey, I've been trying to find the right woman, okay? It's not my fault I had to go through over a ton of 'em before the right one finally came along."

No argument there as everyone just decided to nod at that logic.

"So, tell us about this secret girlfriend of yours," Chandler said.

"Yeah, what's her name?" Monica asked.

"When do we get to meet her?" Ross asked.

"Is she the best sex you ever had?" Rachel asked.

"RACHEL!" everyone exclaimed while looking at her like she just grew two heads.

"What? It's a valid question," Rachel defended, causing poor Joey to roll his eyes and facepalm in embarrassment.

"Well, first off, as Rachel casually revealed, her name is Regina; Regina Philange," Joey explained. "And if you must know, yes, she in fact IS the best sex I ever had."

"Yes! Yes, I knew it! In your face!" Rachel excitedly exclaimed, earning another eye roll and facepalm from Joey.

"Why did you look at me when you said that last part?" Monica asked her former roommate.

"I have no idea!" Rachel replied, still keyed up.

"I think somebody must've overdosed on her dumb blond pills this morning," Chandler whispered to his fiancee and soon-to-be brother-in-law.

Just then, Phoebe entered the coffee house all dressed up, turning some heads in the group.

"Whoa!" the whole group exclaimed upon seeing Phoebe.

"Foxy lady," Joey said in regard to his secret girlfriend, strongly resisting the urge to jump up and kiss her in front of everybody.

"Thanks," Phoebe happily responded to the compliments. "I know, though."

"So, Pheebs, have you heard about Joey's secret girlfriend?" Monica asked.

"Secret girlf- what secret girlfriend?" Phoebe cluelessly asked.

"You know, Pheebs, Regina-" Joey started to say.

"-Oh, oh, Philange, right!" Phoebe finished as she remembered the code names she and Joey came up with for each other in case it got out that one of them were secretly going steady with someone. "Yeah, yeah, he uh, he uh, he uh might've mentioned her."

"So, my question still stands," Ross stated. "When do we get to meet this girl who's the best sex you ever had?"

Phoebe is visibly pleased with that statement.

"Really?! The best sex Joey's ever had?! That's what you heard?!" Phoebe asked, trying to keep her true excitement over that revelation under wraps. She then turned to Joey and asked, "You really said that?"

"I might've said that," Joey replied sheepishly. Phoebe started giggling happily. "Why is that funny?"

"Because I'm very happy for Regina!" Phoebe explained. "And you, you lucky dog!"

"Well, anyway, to answer Ross' question, she's actually really shy; I-I don't think she's up to meeting everyone yet," Joey explained.

"Yeah, I don't think she's up to meeting everyone yet," Phoebe parroted.

"Oh, well, you just let us know when she is ready, m'kay?" Ross said.

"Will do," Joey replied.

"So, Pheebs, what're you all dressed up for?" Chandler asked.

"Um, I'm gonna go meet Duncan, he's skating tonight at the Garden," Phoebe explained. "He's in the Capades."

"The Ice Capades?" Rachel asked.

"No, no the Gravel Capades," Chandler sarcastically retorted. "Yeah, the turns aren't as fast but when Snoopy falls. . . funny."

Just then, Ross' beeper went off.

"Oh, it's the museum, can I?" Ross said as he got up from the couch and took the phone from Monica, who handed it to him.

Monica, with Rachel and Joey in tow, approached Phoebe at the counter and said, "I can't believe you're dressing up for him. I mean, you're just, you're setting yourself up all over again."  
"Okay, no," Phoebe retorted. "For your information I'm going to see him so I can put all those feeling behind me, okay? And the reason I'm dressed like this is because I think it's nice to look nice for your gay husband." Monica couldn't think of a way to argue with that logic so she just nodded. "Besides, Joey's not the only one who's secretly going steady with someone."

"Really? Who're you seeing?" Monica asked curiously.

"His name is Ken Adams," Phoebe replied, earning approving nods from Rachel and Joey that went unnoticed by Monica. "And before you ask, yes, he is the best sex I've ever had..." Rachel and Joey gaped and smiled happily at her respectively when she said that. "...and, like Joey's girlfriend, he's really shy too and I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet."

"Yeah, I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet," Joey parroted, earning an elbow to the gut from Rachel.

"Okay, well, when he is ready, let us know, okay?" Monica said.

"Will do," Phoebe retorted.

With that, Monica sat down on the sofa with Chandler, leaving Phoebe, Rachel and Joey alone at the counter.

"So, I'm the best sex you've ever had, huh?" Joey asked in a whisper so the others don't hear.

"Yeah, and apparently I'm yours, too," Phoebe retorted, also in a whisper as the two beamed at each other.

"Yes, you are," Joey whispered seductively.

"Guys, coffee house, public place, our friends right near us, hello?" Rachel silently admonished the secret lovers.

"Oh, right, sorry," Joey and Phoebe apologized as they immediately went back to pretending they're just friends.

"Don't worry though, Joey, when I go see Duncan, I will let him know that I'm seeing someone, okay? I mean, hey, he's gay so I know he'll be okay with it."

"Great, thanks, Pheebs," Joey said appreciatively.

"Plus, I'm not actually dressed this way for him; this is actually for you," Phoebe explained, indicating her dress.

Joey hid his urge to take her right then and there well.

Just then, Ross came back into the scene with the phone.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Australopithecus isn't supposed to be in that display," Ross exclaimed into the phone. "No. No. No, no, Homo Habilus was erect, Australopithecus was never fully erect."

"Well, maybe he was nervous," Chandler quipped.

 _Act two..._

Later that evening at the Museum of Natural History, Rachel is waiting patiently as Ross is fixing the display he was talking about on the phone earlier.

"Oh look, I can't believe this!" Ross exclaimed as he picked up a clay pot. "Look, Homo Habilus hasn't even learned how to use tools yet and they've got him here with, with clay pots? Why don't, why don't they just give him a microwave?"

"Well, clearly, honey, he'd have no place to plug it in," Rachel quipped, earning a glare from her boyfriend. "Sorry."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is taking so long," Ross apologized. "Y'know, I, I... it's just, it's longer than I expected; we will have dinner."

"It' okay, it's fine," Rachel reassured as she held Ross' hand.

"KARL!" Ross yelled out as he stormed off, leaving Rachel alone in the display.

Rachel gave a slight groan as she just sat there alone. She looked over at the display model right next to her and decided to take a peek under its loincloth. She's surprised at what she sees.

Meanwhile, at Madison Square Garden, Phoebe entered Duncan's dressing room to find Duncan removing his ice skates.

"Hi!" Phoebe greeted.

"Phoebe!" Duncan happily exclaimed as he leapt to his feet from the sofa.

"Ta-da!"

The two hugged each other for a split second.

"Ahh, look at you, you look great," Duncan complimented.

"Thank you, so do you," Phoebe complimented back.

"Thanks."

"Sparkly."

Phoebe then decided to take a brief look around the dressing room while saying, "So, wow, this is pretty wonderful, huh, Mr. Major Capades Guy? I, I remember when you were just, like, King Friday in 'Mr. Rogers' Ice is Nice'."

"Yeah, you always said I'd make it."

"Yeah, well, ya know, I'm kind of spooky that way. Wooo."

"I missed you."

They hugged again.

"I'm gonna get changed," Duncan announced as he headed into the restroom.

"Okay," Phoebe said. She then exclaimed, "Ole!"

"What?" Duncan asked as he was about to close the door.

"Um, the matador," Phoebe explained, indicating Duncan's costume.

Duncan laughed back in understanding as he disappeared into the restroom, leaving Phoebe alone to laugh at her little joke.

Meanwhile, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are at the table store.

"I'm sorry, tell me why we're here again?" Monica asked the guys.

"I told ya, I need a new table 'cause Regina and I broke the other one doing... y'know, it on it," Joey explained.

"And because it was my table, Joey said I have to buy him a new one," Chandler jumped in.

"But then, Chandler told me that that wasn't the rule and if anything I owe him a table because of my little breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecchio," Joey continued.

"Then Joey suggested we split it, which led to an argument about my last roommate Kip, which you put a stop to by saying you'd chip in and we could all buy it together," Chandler continued.

"And that's why we're here," Joey and Chandler said simultaneously.

"Oh, now I remember," Monica said. "So pick one already so we can get going."

"Okay..." Joey said as he looked around. Finally he spotted one and asked, "...how about that one?"

"That's patio furniture!" Chandler said.

"So what, like people are gonna come in and think, 'Uh-oh, I'm outside again?'" Joey deadpanned.

"What about the birds?" Chandler suggested, gesturing towards another table.

"I don't know, birds just don't say 'Hello, sit here, eat something'," Joey declined. "Here, how about the ladybugs?"

"Oh, so, forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest fine dining!" Chandler deadpanned.

"Fine, you want to get the birds, get the birds!" Joey angrily threw his hands up.

"Not like that, I won't!" Chandler retorted. A brief pause ensued until Chandler said, "Kip would have liked the birds!" which resulted in Joey giving him a dirty look.

"Y'know, I just love table shopping with you guys," Monica deadpanned.

Back in Duncan's dressing room, Phoebe is fixing her hair and Duncan reentered wearing regular clothes.

"So um, so what's up? You came to see me earlier today," Phoebe said, getting right to the point.

"Oh, yeah, um, alright, I kinda need a divorce," Duncan replied.

"O. . .kay, " Phoebe said, stunned by this revelation. "How come?"

"Umm, actually, I'm getting married again," Duncan revealed.

"What?" Phoebe asked, now really stunned.

"Oh God, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm straight."

Phoebe gasped.

"Yeah, I know, I..."

"I, I don't, I don't understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you're, you're so smart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties."

"I know, that's what I kept telling myself, but you just reach a point where you can't live a lie anymore."

"So how long have you known?"

"Well, I guess on some level, I always knew I was straight. I thought I was supposed to be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was just trying to fit in."

"And um, and there's actually a, a woman?"

"Her name's Debra."

"Oh, I see," Phoebe nodded in relief. "And is she the first that you've been with?"

"Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me," Duncan explained. "But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college."

"Well, yeah."

"But now I know I don't have a choice about this, I was born this way."

"I, I don't know what to say. I mean, on one hand, y'know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay'!"

"I'm, I'm still me."

"Well, yeah. But, then on the other hand, it's actually a relief that you told me all of this 'cause it makes it easier for me to tell you this: I'm actually seeing someone right now, too."

"That's good to know. And he makes you happy?"

"Very happy. In fact, just today, he told me that I'm the best sex he's ever-" she trailed off as she saw Duncan's begin to wince his face. "That's too much information, isn't it?"

"Just a tad."

Meanwhile, at Joey's apartment, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are all admiring their new table.

"So, what do you think?" Joey asked.

"I think It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen," Chandler replied.

"I know!" Monica added.

The camera panned back to reveal Joey's new Foosball table.

"Thank you so much for helping us buy this, Mon, you're the best," Chandler said as he held his fiancee close to him.

"That's 'cause you made me the best, Chandler," Monica replied.

"All right, let's play this thing!" Joey said excitedly as they started a round of Foosball.

It's two-on-one, Chandler and Monica vs Joey.

"Heads up, Chandler!" she scored on Joey. "Score! You suck!"

Joey looked at Chandler in amazement.

"You are so great! I love you," Chandler said to his fiancee.

"I love you, too," Monica said back as the two proceeded to kiss.

"Oh, I don't need to see that!" Joey exclaimed as he retreated to his bedroom.

Back in Duncan's dressing room, Phoebe is signing the divorce papers.

"So, um, have you told your parents?" Phoebe asked.

"No, but it'll be OK, they're pretty cool. My brother's straight so. . ."

Phoebe finished signing the divorce papers and handed them to Duncan while saying, "Here you go." He took them happily.

"I love you, Phoebe."

They hugged for a final time before Phoebe exited the dressing room, giving Duncan one final good-bye.

Back at the Museum of Natural History, Ross reentered the display where Rachel has been waiting.

"Rach," Ross said.

"Oh," Rachel exclaimed as she stopped plucking the display model she peaked at.

"I'm done," Ross stated.

"Yeah well, you know what, so is uh, Sorrentino's," Rachel revealed as she checked her watch.

Ross checked his own watch and said, "OK, I'm sorry, let's, uh, why don't we find someplace else."

"No, you know what, it's late, everything's gonna be closed. Why don't we just do it another night?" Rachel suggested.

"No, no, we won't."

"We won't?"

Ross grabbed a fur pelt and said, "C'mon."

"Okay, that's dead right?" Rachel asked as she followed Ross out of the display.

Inside the museum planetarium, Ross and Rachel entered on stage.

"What is this? What are we doing?" Rachel asked.

"Shh," Ross shushed. He then held up two juice boxes and asked, "Do you want cran-apple or cran-grape?"

"Grape," Rachel replied as she took the juice box.

Ross spread the pelt on the floor and said, "OK, now, sit." Rachel obeyed as Ross started the music system.

"Oh, my God!" Rachel exclaimed as she looked at the visual display overhead.

The stereo system boomed out 'Billions of years ago...' so Ross got up and changed it to music. The song "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaac is now playing.

"Sorry," Ross apologized as he sat back down next to Rachel.

"So what are we looking at?" Rachel asked.

"Well uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one?" Ross asked, pointing to the display. He then answered, "That is Ursa Major."

"Really?" Rachel asked.

"No idea, could be," Ross replied. He then said, "Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight."

"Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight," Rachel explained.

They kissed and started undressing. As Rachel tried to pull off Ross' tie, she caught it in his mouth.

"Loosen the knot. Loosen the knot," Ross muffledly instructed.

Rachel succeeded in getting the tie out of Ross' mouth and the two resumed making out. Then they began to roll across the fur pelt until Rachel felt something wet.

"Ah, oh God! Oh, honey, oh, that's okay."

"What?" Ross asked, not knowing what she meant. Then he realized what was wrong and said, "Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box."

"Oh, thank God!" Rachel exclaimed, relieved that it was just that and not something else.

With that minor inconvenience past them, the two finally proceeded to make love right on the fur pelt.

The next morning, at the Museum of Natural History, Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.

Ross was the first to awaken; he found himself spooning up behind Rachel, his arm draped over her. He proceeded to wake her by kissing her neck, with successful results.

"Hey," Ross greeted.

"Hey, you," Rachel greeted back. "I can't believe I'm waking up next to you."

"I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah," Ross started to say until he looked at the display window.

"What?" Rachel asked.

"We're not alone," Ross replied.

Rachel looked in the direction Ross was looking and was stunned to find a church youth group outside the display watching them. Ross then proceeded to pull the fur over both him and Rachel to hide themselves from the onlookers.

 **Now that's a wrap for 2x05.**


	34. Dreamy

**Another chapter of flashbacks. Sorry guys!**

** _Dreamy**_

{A few weeks after Monica started to show while pregnant with her and Chandler's little Baby girl Sophie}

"Hi there little one" Chandler bent down to kiss the small baby bump that was forming on his fiancee.

"Hi there Hun" Monica gave her fiancee a kiss.

"Eww guys!" Ross used his typical line.

"Ohh they love each other so much" Rachel gushed.

"We should all go to the park today" Joey suggested.

"Ooh yay the park. I can play gutiar there" Phoebe stated.

"Me and Baby Bing could use some fresh air" Monica said.

"You heard the woman. Let's go to the park today" Rachel drummed her fingers on the table.

"They have a fair there this weekend" Ross answered.

{At 1x10's Christmas party}

(Someone knocks on the door; Monica gets it)

 **Monica:** Hi.

 **Sandy:** Hi, I'm Sandy.

 **Joey:** Sandy! Hi! C'mon in! (She enters, followed by a young boy and a younger girl)...You brought your kids.

 **Sandy:** Yeah. That's okay, right?

(Joey and Monica look at each other and shrug. Ross enters with Marcel on his shoulder)

 **Ross:** Par-tay!

 **Monica:** That thing is not coming in here.

 **Ross:** 'That thing'? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask you something, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in your home?

 **Monica:** I'm thinking your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table.

 **Ross:** Okay. He was more embarrassed about that than anyone. Okay? And for him to have the courage to walk back in here like nothing happened...

 **Monica:** Alright. Just keep him away from me.

 **Ross:** Thank you. (She walks off) C'mon, Marcel, whaddya say you and I do a little mingling? (Marcel runs off) Alright, I'll, uh... catch up with you later.

(The door opens. Rachel is standing there. Her coat is muddy and torn, her hair is disheveled and her face is bruised. Everyone turns to look)

 **Monica:** Oh my gosh! Rachel, honey.. are you okay? Where-where's Paolo?

 **Rachel:** Rome. Jerk missed his flight.

 **Phoebe:** And then... your face is bloated?

 **Rachel:** No. Okay. I was at the airport, getting into a cab, when this woman- this blonde planet with a pocketbook- starts yelling at me. Something about how it was her cab first. And then the next thing I know she just starts- starts pulling me out by my hair! So I'm blowing my attack whistle thingy and three more cabs show up, and as I'm going to get into a cab she tackles me. And I hit my head on the curb and cut my lip on my whistle...oh...everybody having fun at the party? (To Monica) Are people eating my dip?

[Rachel's Room. Phoebe and Monica are watching Rachel put on make up in the mirror.]

 **Rachel:**. K, that looks ok don't it?

 **Phoebe:** You…umm…went a little wide on the lip.

 **Rachel:** Oh! Right there?

 **Phoebe:** Yeah.

 **Rachel:** It's hard for me to tell. My eye's closing up.

 **Monica:** Let me get it for ya. (pencils in on her lip) Ok.

 **Rachel:** All right. (winces in pain)

 **Monica:** You know what? You look fine.

 **Rachel:** Ok here we go! Screw Paolo. Screw that psycho cab lady. It's New Years Eve. Let's have a good time.

 **Monica:** Yes! Ok. (Phoebe exits)

 **Rachel:** Ok, here we go! (gets up)

 **Monica:** Ok. All right there you go. (Rachel walks the wrong way.) No this way. You're fine. There you go.

[Time lapse. Monica and Rachel, fixed up somewhat, emerge from a bedroom]

 **Sandy:** Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.

 **Joey:** Wow, that's, uh, dirty.

 **Sandy:** Yeah.

(They almost kiss and then Joey realizes her kids are staring at them)

 **Joey:** Hey, kids...

 **Ross:** (Watching Marcel play with Phoebe. To Chandler) Look at him. I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.

{Later on where they are all getting ready to have their new years kisses. Jeoy is kissing Pheebs instead of Sandy. And Ross is gonna kiss Rachel}

"5,4,3,2,1!" Ross exclaimed then he and Rachel kissed

Meanwhile, C/M are sharing a very long kiss.

"Happy new years! Mon" Chandler said and rubbed her bump saying,

"Happy new years Baby Girl Bing. Me and Mommy love you so much"

"I love you so much" Monica responed.

"I love you both Babe and Baby Girl" Chandler responed. He wanted to rip that dress off her so badly and make love to her right now.

{Almost four years earlier in 1992. Right after Phoebe moved out. Chandler is taking Monica out to a romantic dinner. They are dining}

He hands her a note...

 _Dear Monica,_

 _I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you._

 _Look up at me right now._

 _From, Chandler._

Monica looked up to see Chandler hold a ring box in his hand and a rose in his mouth.

"Monica I love you so much. I want you to become Mrs. Bing, what I'm saying is. Will you marry me?"

"Yes I'll marry you!" He then placed the ring on her finger. C/M then embraced and kissed passionately; right in front of everyone at the restaurant.

{Another part of Chandlers thanksgiving speech in chapter four}

"Mon I can't wait until get married so soon and when we have our beautiful baby girl in about two months" Chandler took his fiancees hands kissing them.

"Oh you two are so sweet!" Rachel smiles.

"I know!" Monica answers.

"We are the sweetest aren't we?" Chandler wraped his arm around Monica, rubbing her bump.

"I hate to say this about my best friend and little sister but I have to admit, you two are so good together" Ross admitted.

Chandler looked up at Monica and started to kiss her.

"Too cute!" Joey and Phoebe exclaimed.

"Eww guys!" Ross screamed in a low monotone.

"This is the cutest thanksgiving ever. I missed my flight, the apartment got filled with smoke, Joey wasn't able to spend thanksgiving with his family. And Chandler and Mon are the sweetest couple ever" Rachel gushed.

"All for one!" they all get into a hug.

 **Night night :^)**


	35. Windy

**The real stuff will be added when I figure out how to add 2x6 in. Again these are just flashbacks.**

 _/**Windy**\_

 _ **Flashback from 1x15 after Steve leaves. The day after chapter 10.**_

 _"_ Mon you okay?" Rachel asked her pregnant roommate.

"No I'm not. This was my big break in culinary, and it got ruined" Monica sighed.

"Babe it's okay. Look at me, take a deep breath. You are nine months pregnant; you shouldn't be working. It's not good for Baby Girl Bing" Chandler held her close.

Monica gulped in air and started to cry "Stupid pregnancy hormones" as a tear dripped.

"Yeah Mon it's not good to work at nine months pregnant. Don't you have a job at Iridum already?" Ross stated.

"I just want to work at Steve's restaurant" Monica cried.

"Cara Mia the doctor said no more working until after you have our daughter" Chandler cupped her face kissing her then placed a hand on her large belly.

"Eww guys!" Ross exclaimed.

"Aww they love each other so much. They really do" Joey and Phoebe smiled.

 _ **Flashback of when C/M where announcing their engagement in sometime 1992.**_

"My little Harmonica is engaged to her brother's college ex-roommate. I'm so proud of you" Jack beamed happily then hugged his daughter after learning about Chandler and her's engagement.

I'm so proud of you" Judy hugged her too.

(present day note)Yes, Monica have come a long way from being a fat little girl to being soon to-be Mrs. Chandler Bing and a daughter with him.

 _ **Flashback of when C/M are at her first doctors appointment...**_

"I'd like you to step on the scale please" Dr. Hill directed.

Monica stepped on the scale then Dr. Hill said "120 pounds"

"I gained seven pounds. I'm gonna be Moincow again" Monica complained.

"Querdida Mia, your pregnant and already showing. Not fat" Chandler told her.

 ** _Flashback of after C/M went back to the apartment in chapter 24. The other four are there..._**

"Come on, Mon's gotta have Baby Girl. She looks like she's gonna explode" Rachel claimed.

"I know I hate seeing my baby sister like this. But come to think of this, Baby Girl is part of Chandler too. She doesn't want to come out of Monica becuase the baby is like Chandler in a way" Ross retorts.

"Yeah I don't think Monica can hold Baby Girl Bing anymore. The baby is getting to big in her" Phoebe states.

"I bet you guys $50 it the baby will come out of Monica by tommorow afternoon. I bet Chandler's telling the baby to say in there" Joey said.

"In it" the other three say.

"Monica's like ten days late, she's gotta have it now" Rachel replied.

"Like I said, the baby has Chandler's traits and he's telling it to stay in Mon" Ross commented sarcastically but somewhat serious way.

"I agree" Joey and Phoebe answered.

 _ **Flashback in 1x18 where the Geller siblings' poker aunt is there...**_

"Oh my Monica you look like a big balloon" Aunt Iris retored.

"Thanks I needed that" Monica said sarcastically.

"See everyone says I am so fat" Monica cried.

"Babe your not fat" Chandler kissed her.

"Eww guys! I don't need to see you two kiss all the time" Ross whined.

 **A wrap for chapter 35. Sorry for all the shortness, sorry guys. Good night!**


	36. Friendship and Love

**The real stuff of 2x06 will be up next chapter. This chapter will be all sweet and cute. For chronological purposes, let's say the toe cutting accident never happened and Monica was never overweight(disregard the fat little girl statement in ch.35). The gang always knew each other since they were little kids, okay? Good!**

 ** _November_** _1995_

 _/**Friendship and Love**\_

Chandler and Monica watched over their daughters crib as she slept contently.

"Our daughter is so gorgeous, I hated seeing you in so much pain when we were having her. I love you Mon" Chandler took his fiancees hands kissing them.

"I love you too" Monica said between kisses.

He then started to unbutton her shirt and she fumbled with the buttons on his shirt.

"Do you remember when we all surprised you on your 16th birthday" Chandler asked his fiancee of almost four years, and carried her into their bedroom.

In their bedroom, Chandler placed Monica on the bed and started to kiss her.

"I do" She smiled as he started to make love to her.

 _ **[April 22nd, 1985]**_

 _"Step down" Judy said as she covered her daughter's eyes to sheild her from the surprise._

 _'Monica uncovered her eyes to see Chandler and Ross & Rachel standing right there._

 _Joey and Phoebe were also standing there and Jack was recording it all._

 _"Chandler!" Monica exclaimed running over to kiss her boyfriend of three years._

 _"Happy birthday Mon" Chandler said and put his hands on her waist, kissing her more heated._

 _"Aww!" her mother and the girls gushed._

 _"Eww guys! Get a room please" Ross groaned._

 _"We already have a room" Chandler smirked kissing Monica then added_

 _"I can kiss her all the time. I love her so much."_

 _"You love me?" Monica asked as her three year boyfriend sniffed in the scent of her hair._

 _'"I do Mon, very much. You are my soulmate" Chandler said spinning his girlfriend around._

 _"You are my soulmate too" Monica responed then she wrapped her arms around him as they started to kiss even more._

 _"Eww, won't they ever stop kissing in front of us all the time?" Ross asked in a whispery voice._

 _"Aww well they love each other so much. Me and your father are the same way" his mother stated._

 _"I don't need to know that Mom" Ross said._

 _Monica then asked "Who are all these people?" as she heard more talking going on._

 _Then all the people in her grade made appearances._

 _"Oh my god! This is so great" Monica began hugging everyone._

 _Then she saw the smile on Chandler's face._

 _"You? I had no idea, I love you" Monica began hugging her boyfriend._

 _"I love you too Mon" Chandler started to kiss her again._

 _He then took a box out revealing an expensive Bracelet._

 _"Oh this is so beautiful, so beautiful. Where did you get this?" Monica wrapped her arms around her boyfriend._

 _"I was telling my mom that your birthday was coming up, so she talked to a friend who works at Pandora. That got you this bracelet" Chandler explained._

 _"They are here!" Joey said as his sisters who are carrying presents walked in._

 _"Happy birthday Monica!" Joey's sisters hugged her._

 _"Happy birthday Pumpkin" Jack hugged his daughter._

 _"I can't believe you are 16 now, soon you and Chandler will get married. Then have beautiful babie, and I'll be the single one" Rachel hugged Monica whipping her tears away._

 **[Back to the present day]**

"What a day we had" Chandler said as Monica's in his arms, after they had made love.

"I know. Everyone surprised me that day" Monica replied as they started to kiss some more.

"Remember when we hit our ninth year anniversary, and you got apartment #20 while I got #19. A little before Joey moved with me" Chandler asked as they enterwined fingers. He kisses the hand where the sapphire engagement ring lay in it's place.

 **[It's 1991]**

" _I love you Mon" Chandler kissed his girlfriend's hand._

 _"I love you too and now we are closer to each other" Monica stated._

 _They then started to take each others clothing off._

 _They lay in just their undergarments._

 _He unclasped her bra and moved down, starting to take off her underwear. As she she took off his boxers._

 _Next they make love to each other._

 **[Back to the present day. AGAIN]**

 _ **There's a saying old, says that love is blind**_  
 _ **Still we're often told, "seek and ye shall find"**_  
 _ **So I'm going to seek a certain lad I've had in mind**_

 _ **Looking everywhere, haven't found him yet**_  
 _ **He's the big affair I cannot forget**_  
 _ **Only man I ever think of with regret**_

 _ **I'd like to add his initial to my monogram**_  
 _ **Tell me, where is the shepherd for this lost lamb?**_

 _ **There's a somebody I'm longin' to see**_  
 _ **I hope that he, turns out to be**_  
 _ **Someone who'll watch over me**_

 _ **I'm a little lamb who's lost in the wood**_  
 _ **I know I could, always be good**_  
 _ **To one who'll watch over me**_

 _ **Although he may not be the man some**_  
 _ **Girls think of as handsome**_  
 _ **To my heart he carries the key**_

 _ **Won't you tell him please to put on some speed**_  
 _ **Follow my lead, oh, how I need**_  
 _ **Someone to watch over me.**_

"Babe remember when we were at our first sonogram for Sophie?" Chandler kissed his fiancees lips softly.

"I remember very much" Monica answered.

Then they start to make love to each other again.

 **[September 1994]**

 _"Where is the baby?" Monica asked once the sonogram came up._

 _"My love, the baby is that peanut shaped thing" Chandler kissed her hand pointing to the ultrasound._

 _"What kind of a mother am I that I can't see my own baby?" Monica cried._

 _"It's okay Babe. I love you, we are new time parents" Chandler held her close._

 _"You have a wonderful fiance" the doctor said._

 _"I know" Monica smiles happily_.

 **Since I have a delay tomorrow, I'm gonna try to update my stories some more and afterschool. Good night guys! :^) ㈳6**


	37. Our Love

Authors note: I got bored so I decided to make another chapter of flashbacks, sorry guys!

Disclaimer: I ow nothing, the show and characters all belong it's righteous owners. Nor do I own the lyrics used.

 ** _Continued off from the last chapter..._**

After they made love for the third time that night, Monica asked.

"Remember the morning before I went into labor with Sophie?"

Chandler nodded as they started to make love again.

 **[March 1995]**

 _"Baby Girl Bing_ _, please come out soon and don't hurt Mommy" Chandler bent down to Monica's height then he kissed her belly._

 _He smiled lovingly when the baby kicked under his lips._

 _"She keeps on kicking my ribcage" Monica complained pointing to the spot._

 _He rubbed the spot._

 _"Babe she'll come out soon. You've gaven her a wonderful home for the past nine months" he started to rub her large bump._

 _"You did this to me Chandler Bing! You got me pregnant and now our daughter doesn't want to come out!" Monica looked angrily at him._

 _"I know I love you Mon. So very much" he kissed her hand, looking into those beautiful blue eyes that he hopes their Baby Girl will receive._

[Back to the present day]

"You are so sweet I love you" they start to kiss.

"Remember when it was Christmas '88 weekend, and you, Pheobe & Rachel came to visit me, Joey and Ross?" Chandler asked.

Mionica nods.

[The weekend before Christmas 1988. The college party at NYU]

 _"I love you" Chandler pushed Monica up to a wall and kissed her hungrily._

 _"Mhmm. Some party goin' on" Monica let a soft moan._

 _"Let's go before Ross does his "Eww guys" catchphrase. And Rachel and Phoebe overdose on their dumb blonde pills" he picked her up and into someone's vacant bedroom._

 _Chandler places Monica on the bed and started to kiss her._

 _He unbuttoned her blouse, unzipping her pants._

 _He went on top of her. She strattled him as she started to unbutton his top._

 _Soon they were both undressed- clothes thrown everywhere but then the door opening was heard..._

 _"Oh my god!" Someone gasped, it was Ross's friend Will Colbert who yelled "Lock the door before you fuck!"._

 _He closed the door leaving the two lovebirds to do their business._

[To the present day]

 _ **"Hurt"**_

 _ **Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face**_  
 _ **You told me how proud you were but I walked away**_  
 _ **If only I knew what I know today**_  
 _ **Ooh ooh**_

 _ **I would hold you in my arms**_  
 _ **I would take the pain away**_  
 _ **Thank you for all you've done**_  
 _ **Forgive all your mistakes.**_

 _ **There's nothing I wouldn't do**_  
 _ **To hear your voice again.**_  
 _ **Sometimes I wanna call you but I know you won't be there**_

 _ **Oh, I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do**_  
 _ **And I've hurt myself by hurting you**_

 _ **Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit**_  
 _ **Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss**_  
 _ **And it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this, ooh, whoa**_

 _ **Would you tell me I was wrong?**_  
 _ **Would you help me understand?**_  
 _ **Are you looking down upon me?**_  
 _ **Are you proud of who I am?**_

 _ **There's nothing I wouldn't do**_  
 _ **To have just one more chance**_  
 _ **To look into your eyes and see you looking back**_

 _ **Oh, I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do**_  
 _ **And I've hurt myself, oh, oh, oh.**_

 _ **If I had just one more day**_  
 _ **I would tell you how much that I've missed you since you've been away**_

 _ **Oh, it's dangerous**_  
 _ **It's so out of line**_  
 _ **To try and turn back time**_

 _ **I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do**_  
 _ **And I've hurt myself by hurting you**_

(AN: This isn't nessacary a sad story but I love this song)

"Remember your 18th birthday too?" Chandler asked twirling his fiancees long hair with his fingers.

[ **April 22, 1987. The Geller home in Long Island]**

 _"Thank you for my new earrings" Monica said._

 _"Thanks for being born" Chandler kissed her leaning against the door as it opened._

 _"Surprise!" everyone shouted out._

 _"Oh my god!" Monica squealed hugging her parents, Ross, and friends._

 _"Happy birthday Sweetie" her parents hugged her._

After 12 years of dating and being engaged for 4 years, Monica was finally getting her wish.

Chandler was her soulmate, they have a beautiful Baby Girl, amazing parents, wonderful best friends and great jobs.

 _ **I'll be seeing you**_

 _ **In all the old familiar places**_  
 _ **That this heart of mine embraces**_  
 _ **All day and through**_

 _ **In that small cafe**_  
 _ **The park across the way**_  
 _ **The children's carousel**_  
 _ **The chestnut trees, the wishing well**_

 _ **I'll be seeing you**_  
 _ **In every lovely summer's day**_  
 _ **In everything that's light and gay**_  
 _ **I'll always think of you that way**_

 _ **I'll find you in the morning sun**_  
 _ **And when the night is new**_  
 _ **I'll be looking at the moon**_  
 _ **But I'll be seeing you**_

 _ **I'll be seeing you**_  
 _ **In every lovely summer's day**_  
 _ **In everything that's light and gay**_  
 _ **I'll always think of you that way**_

 _ **I'll find you in the morning sun**_  
 _ **And when the night is new**_  
 _ **I'll be looking at the moon**_  
 _ **But I'll be seeing you.**  
_

Authors Note: Have a wonderful day guys! ㈴2


	38. Blue Eyes

Authors Note: I can't resist, more flashbacks. :P

 _Continued from last chapter..._

 ** _November 1995_**

"Remember when we made Sophie?" Chandler asked his fiancee of almost four years.

"Sure do. That was when you knocked me up" Monica smirked.

 **[AN: Let's pretend that the flashback from Season 3, was set in may 1994 and Joey never hit on Monica. Remember the gang were best friends when they were little kids)**

 _Mondler were all alone in the bar that was going to turn into a coffee house._

 _"I want you to kiss me and make love to me, right here right now" Monica said._

 _Chandler dropped his pool stick on the floor and started to kiss her._

 _He picked her up and placed her on the pool table._

 _They were undressing each other, then he moved down removing her underwear and unhooked her bra._

 _She removed his boxers._

 _"Oh Chandler. Oh Chandler" Monica let out a moan._

 _"Oh Monica" Chandler moaned back._

 _They heard the door open and someone scream "Oh my god! Dear mercy"_

 _Then the mysterious person left allowing the young couple to get back to business._

Back to the present day...

"Sophie was our 'Pool Table baby" Chandler kissed his fiancees lips softly.

"Remember when I recently found out we expecting her? And we did it on your work desk" Monica traced circles on his chest with her fingers.

"I do Mon I love you" Chandler answered then he proceeded to make love to her again.

 _[October 1994]_

 _"Mon what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be resting_ _" Chandler questioned at the presence of his pregnant fiancee in his work office._

 _"I am but I just wanted to see you" Monica explained licking her lips at him._

 _"I love you" He kissed her lips_

 _Then they started undressing each other._

 _A few days ago, Chandler noticed that the pregnancy has added a more delicate glow on Monica. After all she was going to have their Baby in 4 months._

 _Afterwards, Monica asked "Think we can do again before you have your meeting soon?"_

 _Chandler grinned "Of course Babe anything for you"_

 **"My Eyes"**  
 **(feat. Gwen Sebastian)**

 **Those high heels with that sun dress**  
 **Turquoise heart hanging 'round your neck**  
 **Red lips like wine, wanna drink 'em up**  
 **And keep on drinkin' 'til you make me drunk**

 **Tied up hair, wanna let it down**  
 **And just let the rest fall to the ground**  
 **You take beautiful to the max**  
 **Can't help myself when you look like that**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, girl the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, love the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **There's a million stars dancing in the sky**  
 **A picture perfect moon so bright**  
 **But I don't care, I'm looking at you**  
 **From where I stand you can't beat the view**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, girl the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, love the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **My eyes have seen**  
 **Some amazing things**  
 **But girl, my eyes ain't seen**  
 **Nothing quite like you, hey baby**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, girl the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, love the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you**

 **Come a little closer, come a little closer**  
 **Come a little closer, love the way you look tonight**  
 **My eyes are the only thing I don't wanna take off of you.**

[Back to present day]

"I love you so much. My Love" Chandler kissed his fiancee and they enterwined fingers.

"I love you so much too" Monica responded.

"Remember the night of the eighth grade prom where we did it for the first time. Both of our first times" Chandler asked.

She nodded.

 **[June 1983. The rest of the gang and the Gellers were out]**

 _"Mon are you ready to do this now" Chandler questioned then added " I won't hurt you. Promise"_

 _Monica smiled at her boyfriends reassuring words and nodded._

 _He lay her on her bed then started to kiss her._

 _Next they made love for the first time in their young lives._

 _Afterwards, Monica lay in Chandler's arms._

 _"You okay Babe?" he asked._

 _"That was amazing" She replied._

 _"I'm so happy we did this. I love you Mon" Chandler said and started to say something else._

 _"Make love to me again" Monica cut him off._

 _"As you wish" He started to make love to her again._

 ** _Authors Note: Good night! ㈴4_**


	39. The Time of My Life

Authors Note: Y'all are probably wondering why this girl won't stop writing flashbacks.

A few days later when they get home, Chandler asked "Remember when we did it in the storage closet on Joey's birthday?"

"I remember" Monica said placing Sophie in her crib then entered her and Chandler's bedroom.

Back in the bedroom, Chandler said "I love you Mon"

"I love you too " Monica answered.

Then continued "Make love to me".

"As you wish" Chandler grinned.

 **[It's 1991, a little before Rachel left the group and it's Joeys birthday. They are at the Tribbiani home in Queens]**

 _"Where are all the jello shots" Monica asked._

 _"Chandler's supposed to be passing them around" Joey said._

 _Then the camera pans over to Chandler feeding Pat the dog jello shots._

 _"Stick out your tounge" Monica instructs her boyfriend of 9 years._

 _"Take off your shirt" Chandler kisses her neck._

 _"Eww guys!" Ross exclaimed._

 _She whispers "Later on"_

 _Chandler stuck out his tongue which is green._

 _"Man! Those are pure vodka" Joey exclaimed._

 _"Jello like Mom used to make" Chandler slurred._

 _"Joey!" Joey's sisters entered from their bedrooms._

 _"Hey!" He hugged them._

 _Joey's sister Cookie came over too Phoebe and asked "What'd you got in there?"_

 _"Vodka and cranberry juice" Phoebe annouced._

 _"Hmm that was the same drink I had right after I killed my husband, a few days ago" Cookie shrugged and walked away._

 _"Seriously Chandler? Why did you drink all the shots" Rachel asked angrily._

 _Chandler pushes Monica up to a wall and started to kiss her._

 _"Let's go to somewhere private" He picks her up._

 _They go into Big Joey's work area which has a storage room in it._

 _He put her down._

 _The young couple start undressing each other._

 _Clothes thrown everywhere in the room._

 _"Oh Monica" Chandler moaned._

 _"Oh Chandler...oh Chandler ooh" Monica softly moaned._

 _Hands roaming each others bodies._

Back to the present day...

"I remember Joey's ditzy sister Gina saw us" Monica said.

"I love you" Chandler twirled his fiancees long raven black hair, with his fingers.

Then he asked "Remember when Ross and Joey interrupped our date once in college"

[It's 1990. The three guys of the group got new chaire in there dorm. Monica and Rahcel room with Phoebe _]_

 _"Don't ring us, ring GellerGreene" Ross said into the phone._

 _Then turned to Joey "See told ya we don't have to get up"_

 _Back at the girls dorm, Mondler are on their date. All alone in the dorm._

 _"I love you so much Mon. I really do" Chandler kissed his fiancees lips passionately._

 _"I love you so much too" Monica answered then they as they are going in for a more passionate kiss, the Chinese guy calls out "Food's here!"_

 _"Oh my god! I'm going to kill these guys" Monica said angrily, mad at her brother and Joey._

"Oh I remember, the fat ass Chinese guy interupped our kiss" Chandler smirked.

 **"Lay Me Down"**

 **Yes, I do, I believe**  
 **That one day I will be**  
 **Where I was right there**  
 **Right next to you**

 **And it's hard**  
 **The days just seem so dark**  
 **The moon and the stars**  
 **Are nothing without you**

 **Your touch, your skin**  
 **Where do I begin?**  
 **No words can explain**  
 **The way I'm missing you**

 **Deny this emptiness**  
 **This hole that I'm inside**  
 **These tears**  
 **They tell their own story**

 **Told me not to cry when you were gone**  
 **But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong**

 **Can I lay by your side?**  
 **Next to you, you**  
 **And make sure you're alright**  
 **I'll take care of you**  
 **I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight**

 **I'm reaching out to you**  
 **Can you hear my call?**  
 **This hurt that I've been through**  
 **I'm missing you, missing you like crazy**

 ** _[This verse only at album version:]_**  
 **You told me not to cry when you were gone**  
 **But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong**

 **Can I lay by your side?**  
 **Next to you, you**  
 **And make sure you're alright**  
 **I'll take care of you**  
 **I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight**

 **Lay me down tonight**  
 **Lay me by your side**  
 **Lay me down tonight**  
 **Lay me by your side**  
 **Can I lay by your side?**  
 **Next to you**  
 **You**

"You are so wonderful" Monica replied.

"And you are so wonderful too" Chandler kissed her.

"I love you Chan. Always" She said.

He smiled then proceeded to make love to her.

 **Bill medley: Now I've had the time of my life**  
 **No I never felt like this before**  
 **Yes I swear it's the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 **Jennifer warnes: 'Cause I've had the time of my life**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 **Bill medley: I've been waiting for so long**  
 **Now I've finally found someone**  
 **To stand by me**

 **Jennifer warnes: We saw the writing on the wall**  
 **As we felt this magical fantasy**

 **Both: Now with passion in our eyes**  
 **There's no way we could disguise it secretly**  
 **So we take each other's hand**  
 **'Cause we seem to understand the urgency**

 **Bill medley: just remember**

 **Jennifer warnes: You're the one thing**

 **Bill medley: I can't get enough of**

 **Jennifer warnes: So I'll tell you something**

 **Both: This could be love because**

 **[Chorus:]**  
 **Both: I've had the time of my life**  
 **No I never felt this way before**  
 **Yes I swear it's the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 **Jennifer warnes: With my body and soul**  
 **I want you more than you'll ever know**

 **Bill medley: So we'll just let it go**  
 **Don't be afraid to lose control**

 **Jennifer warnes: Yes I know whats on your mind**  
 **When you say:**  
 **"Stay with me tonight."**

 **Bill medley: Just remember**  
 **You're the one thing**

 **Jennifer warnes: I can't get enough of**

 **Bill medley: So I'll tell you something**

 **Both: This could be love because**

 **[Chorus:]**  
 **Both: 'Cause I had the time of my life**  
 **No I've never felt this way before**  
 **Yes I swear it's the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**  
 **'Cause I've had the time of my life**  
 **And I've searched through every open door**  
 **Till I found the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 ***Instrumental***

 **Bill medley: Now I've had the time of my life**  
 **No I never felt this way before**

 **(jennifer warnes: Never Felt this way)**

 **Bill medley: Yes I swear it's the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 **Both: "cause I've had the time of my life**  
 **No I've never felt this way before**  
 **Yes I swear it's the truth**  
 **And I owe it all to you**

 **Both: 'Cause I had the time of my life**  
 **And I've searched through every open door**

Authors Note: Good night for real guys! ㈷4


	40. You Make Me So Happy

Authors Note: I just thought of some more cute flashbacks.

 **The next two nights later C/M have put their Baby Girl to sleep and he carries her to their bedroom.**

"I love you so much Mon. Remember what else everyone said when they met baby Sophie" Chandler started unbuttoning his fiancees blouse.

"I do" Monica smiled.

Then he started to make love to her.

 _A missing moment from ch.26._

 _March 1995._

 _"Oh my god! She's amazing. Oh oh, I'm so happy you guys had sex the night Rachel visited when I found out Carol was a lesbian"..._

 _Ross studied Sophie closely noticing she had Chandlers blue eyes and everything else was of Monica._

 _"This is incredible. I mean one minute she's inside of you Mon and 47 hours later; here she is" Phoebe stated._

 _"She's such a darling Baby Mon! I'm so happy Chandler knocked you up on the night I visited" Rachel squealed._

 _"I know!" Monica replied._

 _"Our first granddaughter. I'm so proud of you Harmonica" Jack said._

 _"I know Daddy" Monica smiled._

 _"Your father is right, you and Chandler had such a beautiful Baby Girl" Judy agreed._

 _"She looks just like you Monica" Joey observed the baby._

[Back to the present day...]

"You make me so happy" Chandler kissed his fiancees hand.

Then asked "Remember when you had the freak out at the baby shower, that Rach and Pheebs threw for you"

"And you make me so happy too" Monica replied.

Chandler smiled lovingly then proceeded to make love to her again.

 **[Months earlier in december, when Rachel and Phoebe threw Monica a baby shower. They invited all her co-workers]**

 _Monica opened the present to find a pair of leather jeans._

 _"Why would you get me something that I can't wear for another two months?!" Monica asked angril_ y.

 _Her co-worker Lexis looked bemused and whispered to Rachel and Phoebe, "You two said she wanted it"_

 _[Later that day when Monica enters the coffee house to see Rachel and Phoebe sitting on the orange couch]_

 _"Listen girls, I'm sorry I acted that way" Monica apologized._

 _Rachel and Phoebe stare at her._

 _"It's does dumb pregnancy hormones and this is mine and Chandlers daughter" Monica explained patting her large belly._

 _ **"Young Girls"**_

 _ **I spent all my money, bought a big old fancy car**_  
 _ **For these bright-eyed honies**_  
 _ **Oh, yeah, you know who you are**_  
 _ **Keep me up 'til the sun is high**_  
 _ **'Til the birds start calling my name**_  
 _ **I'm addicted and I don't know why**_  
 _ **Guess I've always been this way**_

 _ **[PRE-CHORUS]**_  
 _ **All these roads steer me wrong**_  
 _ **But I still drive them all night long, all night long**_

 _ **[CHORUS]**_  
 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You make a mess of me**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You'll be the death for me, the death for me**_  
 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **No matter what you do**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **I'll always come back to you, come back to you**_

 _ **I get lost under these lights**_  
 _ **I get lost in the words I say**_  
 _ **Start believing my own lies**_  
 _ **Like "Everything will be okay"**_  
 _ **Oh, I still dream of a simple life**_  
 _ **Boy meets girl, makes her his wife**_  
 _ **But love don't exist**_  
 _ **When you live like this**_  
 _ **That much I know, yes I know**_

 _ **[PRE-CHORUS]**_  
 _ **All these roads steer me wrong**_  
 _ **But I still drive them all night long, all night long**_

 _ **[CHORUS]**_  
 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You make a mess of me**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You'll be the death for me, the death for me**_  
 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **No matter what you do**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **I'll always come back to you, come back to you**_

 _ **You, you, you,**_  
 _ **You, you, you**_  
 _ **Yeah, you, you, you**_  
 _ **You, you, you, you**_

 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You make a mess of me**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **You'll be the death for me, the death for me**_  
 _ **All you young wild girls**_  
 _ **No matter what you do**_  
 _ **Yeah, you young wild girls**_  
 _ **I'll always come back to you, come back to you**_

 _[Back to present day...]_

"I love you so much Mon. I love you" Chandler kissed his fiancee.

"I love you so much too" Monica answered.

Then he asked, "Remember when you were 5 months with our daughter, and your dad invited us all to the ball. Where your pregnancy was promptly revealed"

 **[October 1994]**

 _"We'd like to pay glowing tribute to our daughter who is engaged, to her long time friend. And they are expecting their first baby in four months" the Gellers said into the podium._

 _"Care for a dance" Chandler asked._

 _Monica nodded._

 _"I love you" He said._

 _He then started spinning her around gently._

[Back to the present day...]

"I remember" Monica said.

Chandler smiled lovingly and started to make love to her again.

" _ **At Last"**_

 _ **At last**_  
 _ **My love has come along**_  
 _ **My lonely days are over**_  
 _ **And life is like a song**_

 _ **Oh yeah yeah**_  
 _ **At last**_

 _ **The skies above are blue**_  
 _ **My heart was wrapped up in clover**_  
 _ **The night I looked at you**_

 _ **I found a dream, that I could speak to**_  
 _ **A dream that I can call my own**_  
 _ **I found a thrill to press my cheek to**_  
 _ **A thrill that I have never known**_

 _ **Oh yeah yeah**_  
 _ **You smiled, you smiled**_  
 _ **Oh and then the spell was cast**_  
 _ **And here we are in heaven**_  
 _ **for you are mine...**_

 _ **At Last**_

 **"Love Me Harder"**  
 **(with The Weeknd)**

 ** _[Ariana Grande:]_**  
 **Tell me something I need to know**  
 **Then take my breath and never let it go**  
 **If you just let me invade your space**  
 **I'll take the pleasure, take it with the pain**

 **And if in the moment I bite my lip**  
 **Baby, in that moment you'll know this is**  
 **Something bigger than us and beyond bliss**  
 **Give me a reason to believe it**

 **'Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder**  
 **And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder**  
 **Baby, love me harder**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Love me, love me, love me,**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Harder, harder, harder**

 ** _[The Weeknd:]_**  
 **I know your motives and you know mine**  
 **The ones that love me, I tend to leave behind**  
 **If you know about me and choose to stay**  
 **Then take this pleasure and take it with the pain**

 **And if in the moment you bite your lip**  
 **When I get you moaning you know it's real**  
 **Can you feel the pressure between your hips?**  
 **I'll make it feel like the first time**

 ** _[Ariana Grande & The Weeknd:]_**  
 **'Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (I'm a love you harder)**  
 **And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (love me harder)**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Love me, love me, love me,**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Harder, harder, harder,**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Love me, love me, love me,**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Harder, harder, harder**

 **So what do I do if I can't figure it out? (figure it out)**  
 **You got to try, try, try again, yeah.**  
 **So what do I do if I can't figure it out? (figure it out)**  
 **I'm gonna leave, leave, leave again**

 **'Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (I'm a love you, love you, love you)**  
 **And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (love me, love me, baby)**  
 **'Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (love me harder)**  
 **And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder (I'm a love you harder)**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Love me, love me, love me,**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Harder, harder, harder,**  
 **(Love me, love me, baby)**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**  
 **Love me, love me, love me**  
 **(Just a little bit, harder, harder, baby)**  
 **Ooh, ooh, ooh, oooh,**

 **Harder, harder, harder.**

 _TBC..._

Authors Note: Good night for right now, guys! ㈴1


	41. A fairytale because I have no choice

Authors Note: Sorry more flashbacks!

 _CONTINUED FROM LAST CHAPTER..._

 ** _Show: FRIENDS_**

 ** _Season: Season two_**

The next evening, Mondler got back from the Geller home in Long Island but Monica and Sophie were at Cental Perk. Now they are back at Apartment #20

Monica gently placed Sophie in her crib whispering "Mommy loves you Baby Girl" as the little baby girl stirred in her crib. The little baby girl looked at her mothers blue eyes then with her own blue eyes. Her mother planted a kiss on her forehead and sliently closed the light then the door.

* * *

Then entered her and Chandler's bedroom to see him with a rose in his mouth, rose petals on the bed and he's wearing a tuxedo.

Chandler took her hands and kissed them, he said "Let's make a baby"

"What? Are you crazy, Sophie's not even 8 months yet" Monica stated.

"I love you Mon, you made me so happy giving me a baby girl and I can't wait until you become Mrs. Bing in a few months. So let's try for another one" He started undressing her.

"I love you too" Monica replied.

Chandler smiled lovingly then started to make love to her.

* * *

Afterwards, Mondler lay in each others arms...

"Remember the day we had our first kiss and got together?" Chandler asked.

"I remember" Monica said then he proceeded to make love to her again.

 _[April 22, 1982. The Geller home]_

 _Show: FRIENDS_

 _Season: High school era._

 ** _Chandler: I dare you to kiss me_**

 ** _Monica: What?_**

 ** _Chandler: Kiss me and be my girlfriend._**

 ** _Some of the girls from school: Kiss, kiss!_**

 ** _Monica: Only because this is how I imagined the start of my fairytale. And because I have no choice._**

 ** _Without hesitation, Monica leaned in._**

 ** _Wow, she thought. He was not only good he was amazing._**

 ** _Chandler: So you'll be my girlfriend_**

 ** _Monica(laughs): Only because I have no choice._**

 ** _Then he started to kiss her more passionately and their tongues were practically attacking each other._**

 ** _Ross: And that's my baby sister, ladies and gentlemen._**

 ** _Monica: Shut up I'm happy._**

* * *

[Back to the present day...]

Monica then started to think about the first time she took a pregnancy test.

 _[October 1983]_

 _Show: FRIENDS_

 _Season: High school era_

 ** _Monica's period schedule was very off so she decided to take a pregnancy test._**

 ** _"Here goes nothing" She said to herself then took it._**

 ** _While waiting for the timer to go off, she looked at a picture of Chandler._**

 ** _Monica feared that he would leave her if the test came out to be positive since they were so young._**

 ** _She looked at the results which were negative._**

 ** _Little did Monica know, that 11 years later she found out her and Chandler were going to have a baby._**

 ** _Who looked just like her that the resemble was so scary._**

 ** _Monica gave her flower away to Chandler months earlier which she had no regrets of at all since that was who she loved. She knew in her mind that he was the person she wanted to give it too._**

[Back to the present day...]

"Remember the gruesome pregnancy nightmares" He asked.

She nodded with a slight tear dripping down her face.

 _[November_ _1994]_

 _ **Monica was tossing and turning because her and Chandler's baby girl was jamming her ribs, but then fell asleep.**_

 _ **She had a dream where she wasn't pregnant anymore, and there was blood practically everywhere on the bed.**_

 _ **"OH GOD WHY ME?!" she screamed then woke up in a cold sweat.**_

 _ **Chandler was rubbing her bump.**_

 _ **"Oh Mon, it's just a bad dream okay? Our baby girl is still in there" he traced circles on her back with his fingers.**_

 _ **"I love you" Then they fell alseep in each others arms feeling their Baby Girl kick.**_

* * *

 _[A missing moment from 'The one where Monica has a baby - part 2'(chapter 25)]_

 ** _"Okay don't you bring another woman who has their baby before me, I will sue this hospital. My husband is a lawyer" Monica cursed out the nurse._**

 ** _"Honey-" Chandler tried to calm her down._**

 ** _"No you get back on that case" She frowned as another contraction came._**

 ** _Dr Hill said "I was trying to say you are ten centimeters now"_**

* * *

 _Show: FRIENDS_

 _Season: Season one_

 ** _In the delivery room, Monica collapsed on the bed after a contraction came and gone._**

 ** _"I, I can't do this anymore" She cried._**

 ** _"Honey, you can you are so strong. You've given her a wonderful home for the past nine months" Chandler kissed her sweaty forehead then the large baby bump._**

 ** _"No I'm not!" Monica cried as another contraction came squeezing Chandler's hand in the process._**

 ** _"You are Geller. I've seen you kick Ross' ass many times" He chucked at the last part.._**

 ** _"You bet I am" She complied and pushed really hard._**

 ** _Monica then let out a loud-piercing scream as she can feel the baby slip out of her._**

 ** _Chandler watched on amazement as his daughter came into the world._**

 ** _Her tiny fingers, toes and feet...Baby Bing was in the world now._**

 ** _"She's here" Dr. Hill annouced and held up Baby Bing. Then handed the baby off to some nurses to clean her and wrap her up in a pink blanket_**.

* * *

 _ **The day before Sophie was born, the whole gang were in the apartment.**_

 _ **"So we've tried everything; caster oil, spicy foods, hot tea and long walks. None of it is helping" Chandler said.**_

 _ **"Wow she's not coming out" Rahcel replied.**_

 _ **"Chandler was the one who knocked me up" Monica whined and she could fell her and Chandler's daughter kick her ribcage very hard.**_

 _[Back to the present day...]_

 _Show: FRIENDS_

 _Season: Two_

"You make me the luckiest man on earth. I'm so in love with you" Chandler kissed his fiancees hand.

"And I'm so in love with you too" Monica replied.

Chandler smiled warmly then proceeded to make love to her again.

 _TBC..._

 _°ฯ^ฯ°_

 **DEAN MARTIN LYRICS**

 **"Everybody Loves Somebody"**

 **Everybody loves somebody sometime**  
 **Everybody falls in love somehow**  
 **Something in your kiss just told me**  
 **That sometime is now**

 **Everybody finds somebody someplace**  
 **There's no telling where love may appear**  
 **Something in my heart keeps saying**  
 **My someplace is here**

 **If I had it in my power**  
 **I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms**  
 **Then every minute, every hour**  
 **Everybody would find what I found in your arms**

 **Everybody loves somebody sometime**  
 **And though my dreams were overdue**  
 **Your love made it all worth waiting**  
 **For someone like you**

 **If I had it in my power**  
 **I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms**  
 **Then every minute, every hour**  
 **Everybody would find what I found in your arms**

 **Everybody loves somebody sometime**  
 **And though my dreams were overdue**  
 **Your love made it all worth waiting**  
 **For someone like you.**

Authors Note: I love this song. Good night guys!


	42. Brighter than Sunshine

Authors Note: Sorry, more flashbacks!

A week later at Mondlers apartment, it's night and they just entered with their baby girl.

Monica held Sophie close to her. The sweet little Baby Girl fell asleep in her mother's arms,

"You are so beautiful...like me. And with a mix of me and your father's blue eyes, so perfect Baby Girl" Monica cried a bit.

"Let's get you to bed" She tucked the little baby girl in her crib then planted a kiss on her baby girl's forehead.

Sophie was so gorgeous. Monica thought, she still can't believe her and Chandler made the sweet little Baby Girl.

XXX

Monica then entered her and Chandler's bedroom to see him straight-legged on the bed, waiting for her.

She laid down next to him.

He asked "Remember the night of hot sex we had the night, of your and Rachel's high school graduation and party"

She nodded.

Chandler then started to undress her whispering "I'm so in love with you Mon"

"I'm so in love with you too" Monica said.

Chandler smiled lovingly then proceeded to make love to her.

 **[June 1987. The Geller home, it's just Mondler there since the others went out** **]**

 **"** _I'm so in love with you" Chandler started to kiss his girlfriend of 5 years._

 _"And I'm so in love with you too" Monica smiled then her boyfriend started unbuttoning her pants_

 _Before they knew it, they were undressing each other._

 _Chandler started to rip off Monica's shirt then she did the same with him._

 _Then they took each others pants off. He played with the clasp of her bra then unhooked it._

 _He then moved down removing everything else._

 _Afterwards, they snuggled up._

 _She nuzzlsd her neck on his shoulder, as he wrapped his arms around her petite frame; pulling her closer next to him._

 _"Whoa!" Chandler exclaimed when he saw his love falling asleep then added "Don't fall alseep yet. You've got a whole night of hot lovin' planned for you_ Ma belle femme"

 _Monica laughed then kissed her boyfriend saying "Beau"_

 _He then went back on top of her grinning "magnifique"_

 _XXXX_

 _[Back to the present day...]_

"Oh I remember, we had a lot of hot sex that night" Monica smirked.

Chandler placed soft kisses on her lips then asked "Remember a few days after we found out we were expecting our sweet little baby girl"

She nodded then they started to make love to each other again.

(Factual Authors Note: Let's say, Monica found out she was pregnant in august 1994- around the time Rachel joined the group; another change of the dates)

 **Early September 1994( A few days after Rachel joined the group)**

 **[SCENE: A hot day. Ross and Chandler are talking outside of Central Perk: sitting in the chairs outside]**

 _Ross: So how does it feel to be a father to-be?_

 _Chandler: Amazing. Even though Monica isn't very much showing yet I like to talk to the baby, and rub it._

 _Ross: Let me tell ya Man, you've made my sister the most happiest I've ever seen her before over the past years you two have been together._

 _Monica then went over to where her fiance and brother are. She was wearing a black dress that displayed the bump very clearly(same dress Rachel wore in 'The one in Massapequa'). And her engagement ring that Chandler had given her many months ago, glistened in the light of the sun._

 _She was just starting to show, being in her fourth month. The pregnancy gave her a more delicate glow on her._

 _Chandler noticed a few things different about Monica now that she was pregnant: her boobs got bigger, hips larger and a glow was surrounding her; almost like sparkles..._

 _But he just knew their sweet little baby was growing._

 _He dipped his head to gently kiss her shoulder and her neck._

 _Chandler still thought Monica was the most hottest woman that he's ever fell in love with. His first and only love._

 _~TOURNER DANS LA VIDE(ENGLISH)~_

 _ **It was dark, swarthy**_  
 _ **The shy look, hands all damaged**_  
 _ **it carved stone worker's son**_  
 _ **he was proud, but why are you laughing?**_  
 _ **No, do not judge the**_  
 _ **you who do not know**_  
 _ **Vertigo and toil**_  
 _ **You are falsely happy, you trade your values**_  
 _ **he is my whole world and more than that**_  
 _ **only I shout his name when it comes confusion**_  
 _ **and then everything collapses when it is not there**_  
 _ **I would love to say it but I don ' dare ...**_  
 _ **He who make me**_

 _ **Turn the blank, blank**_  
 _ **turn it blank, blank**_  
 _ **turn in a vacuum, it makes me turn**_  
 _ **in the empty, empty, empty**_  
 _ **turn, turn into the empty**_  
 _ **turn in a vacuum, it is my turn**_  
 _ **(turn in the blank) [ x7]**_

 _ **Who can tell me, what happened?**_  
 _ **Since he's gone, I could not get up**_  
 _ **This is just a memory, a tear the past**_  
 _ **Stuck in my eyes that no longer wants s' go**_  
 _ **Oh no do not laugh**_  
 _ **you who do not know**_  
 _ **the dizziness and pain**_  
 _ **they are superficial, they know nothing of the heart**_  
 _ **He was my whole world, and more than that**_  
 _ **I hope to see him there in the beyond**_  
 _ **Help me everything collapses because it is gone**_  
 _ **you know my beautiful love, my fine soldier ...**_  
 _ **What you do to me**_

 _ **Turn the blank, blank**_  
 _ **turn it blank, blank**_  
 _ **turn into space, you make me turn**_  
 _ **in the empty, empty, empty**_  
 _ **turn, turn into the empty**_  
 _ **turn in a vacuum, it is my turn**_  
 _ **(turn in the blank) [ x7]**_

 _ **He makes me turn into the empty**_  
 _ **Turn into space, turning it empty**_  
 _ **it makes me turn into the empty**_  
 _ **Turn into space, turning into space**_  
 _ **Turn in a vacuum, it is my turn**_  
 _ **Turn into space**_

XXXX

[Back to present day]

"You are so beautiful" Chandler kissed his fiancees hand where the Sapphire engagement ring resides.

"I love you" Monica replied.

Chandler smiled warmly then proceeded to make love to her again.

 _ **"Baby, It's Cold Outside"**_

 _ **I really can't stay - Baby it's cold outside**_  
 _ **I've got to go away - Baby it's cold outside**_  
 _ **This evening has been - Been hoping that you'd drop in**_  
 _ **So very nice - I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice**_

 _ **My mother will start to worry - Beautiful, what's your hurry?**_  
 _ **Father will be pacing the floor - Listen to the fireplace roar**_  
 _ **So really I'd better scurry - Beautiful, please don't hurry**_  
 _ **Maybe just a half a drink more - Put some records on while I pour**_

 _ **The neighbors might think - Baby, it's bad out there**_  
 _ **Say, what's in this drink? - No cabs to be had out there**_  
 _ **I wish I knew how - Your eyes are like starlight now**_  
 _ **To break this spell - I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell**_

 _ **I ought to say no, no, no - Mind if I move in closer?**_  
 _ **At least I'm gonna say that I tried - What's the sense in hurting my pride?**_  
 _ **I really can't stay - Baby don't hold out**_  
 _ **Ah, but it's cold outside**_

 _ **I've got to get home - Oh, baby, you'll freeze out there**_  
 _ **Say, lend me your coat - It's up to your knees out there**_  
 _ **You've really been grand - Thrill when you touch my hand**_  
 _ **Why don't you see - How can you do this thing to me?**_

 _ **There's bound to be talk tomorrow.**_

Authors Note: This has become sort of a songfic. Well good night!


	43. Love of my Life

Authors Note: Happy Valentines Day! Well I gonna do some more flashbacks.

That evening after their love making, Monica looked down at their sweet little baby girl getting feed.

She put Sophie down in between her and Chandler then buttoned up her nightdress.

He put the baby in her fold up crib that was in the bedroom, kissing their sweet little baby girl's forehead.

Chandler climbed back in bed then started kissing Monica`s neck, he pulled back her night dress to reveal her swollen ones(Authors Note: I don't want TO say the real word, okay?) as a result of their sweet little baby girl getting fed.

"Remember the night of Ross and Carols wedding wuere we had a lot of good lovin'?" he asked.

She nodded then they started to make love to each other again.

 **[It's 1991 and At the reception after Carol and Ross got married]**

 _Chandler approached his girlfriend, the love of his life and his soulmate: in a red dress with her long raven black hair pinned in the back with a white barrette._

 _"Hi" He greeted._

 _Monica looked up and greeted back blowing him a kiss._

 _"You are in for a long night of hot lovin' tonight Geller" Chandler kissed her hand._

 _"Talk dirty to me right now" Monica said._

 _"Yeah Baby" Chandler grinned and pushed Monica up to the wall kissing her passionately._

 _"Guys stop it! I don't wanna see that on my wedding day!" Ross exclaimed in disgust._

 _"No you Get a room!" Chandler told him._

 _[_ Back to the present day...]

"Oh, I remember. You made love to me a lot that night" Monica smirked.

"I love you" Chandler kissed her lips softly then asked "Remember when we did it at the old abandoned house that I fixed up after, we went on the lake"

Monica smiled "I do"

Chandler smiled warmly then proceeded to make love to her.

 **[It's Summer 1986 and Chandler reconstructed an abanonded home like Noah dod in 'The Notebook'. While there he and Monica took a canoe ride on the lake]**

 _When they were coming back in after the canoe ride, Chandler pointed out "Babe you are soaked. Let's get you inside" looking in his girlfriends Sapphire blue eyes; that is the same color as the engagement ring he gave to her many years later in 1992._

 _Monica looked down at her baby blue button up dress, she was wearing a while pearl necklace. Her boyfriend lead her into the reconstructed home._

 _In the house she was stopped upon looking at a picture._

 _"Honey come join me in the shower!" Chandler called out from the bathroom._

 _"In a minute!" Monica called back out then she went into the bathroom and took off her clothes, then climbed into the the shower._

 _Afterwards, Chandler picked Monica up: Bridal style and carried her into the bedroom._

 _She was wearing nothing on top; just her panties and the white pearl necklace._

 _While he was wearing a button up shirt that matches the color of his blue eyes and boxers._

 _Chandler layed Monica down on the bed and started to take the remnants of her clothing off._

 _Next, they make love to each other._

 _ **"Wicked Game"**_

 _ **The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.**_  
 _ **It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.**_  
 _ **I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.**_  
 _ **And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you.**_

 _ **No, I don't want to fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **No, I don't want to fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **With you, with you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_

 _ **What a wicked game you play to make me feel this way.**_  
 _ **What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.**_  
 _ **What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.**_  
 _ **What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you**_

 _ **And I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **With you.**_

 _ **The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.**_  
 _ **It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.**_  
 _ **I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.**_  
 _ **And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you,**_

 _ **No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **With you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **With you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **No, I... (this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_  
 _ **(this girl is only gonna break your heart)**_

 _ **Nobody loves no one**_.

[Back to the present day...]

"I'm so in love with you Mon. You are so beautiful" Chandler looked into his fiancee's Sapphire blue eyes.

"And I'm so in love with you too" Monica put her head on his chest.

Chandler smiled lovingly then proceeded to make love to her again.

 _ **"Take Back The Night"**_

 _ **Yeah, uh, feels good, don't it?**_  
 _ **Listen, uh**_

 _ **[Verse 1:]**_  
 _ **Yeah, this was your city**_  
 _ **You did it all and more, broke every law except for one, babe**_  
 _ **Attraction, are you ready**_  
 _ **I know you feel it**_  
 _ **Pull you nearer 'til you feel it again, oh**_

 _ **[Bridge:]**_  
 _ **I wanna do something right**_  
 _ **But we can do something better**_  
 _ **Ain't no time like tonight**_  
 _ **And we ain't trying to save it 'til later**_  
 _ **Stay out here living the life**_  
 _ **Nobody cares who we are tomorrow**_  
 _ **You got that lil' something I like**_  
 _ **A little something I've been wanting to borrow**_

 _ **Tonight the night's, come on surrender**_  
 _ **I won't lead your love astray, astray, yeah**_  
 _ **Your love's a weapon**_  
 _ **Give your body some direction**_  
 _ **That's my aim**_  
 _ **Then, we could**_

 _ **[Chorus:]**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Come on, use me up until there's nothing left**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Dizzy, spinning, sweating, you can't catch your breath**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Ooh, don't know when the sun is rising next**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **So if the feeling's right, then raise your glass and let's**_

 _ **[Post-Chorus:]**_  
 _ **Take back the night, take back the night**_  
 _ **They gon' try to shut us down, I'll be damned if we gon' let them**_  
 _ **Take back the night, take back the night**_  
 _ **You know you gon' mess around and find out there ain't no one better**_

 _ **Take back the night, oh**_  
 _ **Yeah**_

 _ **[Verse 2:]**_  
 _ **Rare, there's not too many**_  
 _ **No one but you and crowded rooms, we can do anything (yeah)**_  
 _ **Attraction can drive you crazy**_  
 _ **The way you move, you go crazy, that's incentive for me**_

 _ **[Bridge:]**_  
 _ **I wanna do something right**_  
 _ **But we can do something better**_  
 _ **Ain't no time like tonight**_  
 _ **And we ain't trying to save it 'til later**_  
 _ **Stay out here living the life**_  
 _ **Nobody cares who we are tomorrow**_  
 _ **You got that lil' something I like**_  
 _ **A little something I've been wanting to borrow**_

 _ **Tonight the night's, come on surrender**_  
 _ **I won't lead your love astray, astray, yeah**_  
 _ **Your love's a weapon**_  
 _ **Give your body some direction**_  
 _ **That's my aim**_  
 _ **Then, we could**_

 _ **[Chorus:]**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Come on, use me up until there's nothing left**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Dizzy, spinning, sweating, you can't catch your breath**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Ooh, don't know when the sun is rising next**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **So if the feeling's right, then raise your glass and let's**_

 _ **[Post-Chorus:]**_  
 _ **Take back the night, take back the night**_  
 _ **They gon' try to shut us down, I'll be damned if we gon' let them**_  
 _ **Take back the night, take back the night**_  
 _ **You know you gon' mess around and find out there ain't no one better**_

 _ **[Middle 8:]**_  
 _ **And the horns say, alright**_  
 _ **And the horns say, alright**_  
 _ **Uh, ooh, and the horns say, alright**_  
 _ **And the horns say**_  
 _ **Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo**_  
 _ **Take it over**_  
 _ **Yeah, yeah**_

 _ **[Timbaland:]**_  
 _ **Y'all ready to have a good time out there, ladies and gentlemen?**_

 _ **Take back the night, take back the night...**_

 _ **[Chorus:]**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Come on, use me up until there's nothing left**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Dizzy, spinning, sweating, you can't catch your breath**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **Ooh, don't know when the sun is rising next**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_  
 _ **So if the feeling's right, then raise your glass and let's**_  
 _ **Take back the night**_

 **"Like I Love You"**  
 **(feat. Clipse)**

 **Just somethin' about you**  
 **Way I'm lookin at you whatever**  
 **keep lookin at me**  
 **Gettin' scared now, right?**  
 **Don't fear me baby, it's just Justin**  
 **It feel good right?**  
 **Listen**

 **I kind of noticed something wasn't right**  
 **In your colorful face**  
 **It's kind of weird to me**  
 **Since you're so fine**  
 **If it's up to me your face'll change...**

 **If you smilin', that should set the tone**  
 **Just be limber**  
 **And If you let go, the music should groove your bones**  
 **Just remember**  
 **Sing this song with me**

 **Ain't nobody love you like I love you**  
 **You're a good girl and that's what makes me trust ya**  
 **Late at night, I talk to you**  
 **You will know the difference when I touch you**

 **People are so phony**  
 **Nosy cause they're lonely**  
 **Aren't you sick of the same thing?**  
 **They say so and so was dating**  
 **Love you or they're hating**  
 **When it doesn't matter anyway**  
 **Cause we're here tonight**

 **If you smiling, that should set the tone**  
 **Just be limber baby**  
 **And If you let go, the music should groove your bones**  
 **Baby just remember**  
 **Sing this song with me**

 **Ain't nobody love you like I love you**  
 **You're a good girl and that's what makes me trust ya**  
 **Late at night, I talk to you**  
 **You will know the difference when I touch you**

 **Yeah, you know I can make ya happy**  
 **I could change your life**  
 **If you give me that chance**  
 **To be your man**  
 **I won't let you down baby**  
 **If you give me that chance**  
 **To be your man**  
 **Here baby, put on my jacket**  
 **And then ...**

 **Maybe we'll fly the night away (I just wanna love you baby)**  
 **Yeah, yeah, yeah**  
 **Girl**  
 **Maybe we'll fly the night away(I just wanna love you baby)**  
 **Girl ...**

 ** _[RAP]_**  
 **Ma, what you wanna do?**  
 **I'm in front of you**  
 **Grab a friend, see I can have fun with two**  
 **Or me and you put on a stage show**  
 **And the mall kids, that's how to change low**  
 **From them you heard "wow, it's the same glow"**  
 **Look at me, I say "yeah, it's the same dough"**  
 **We the same type, you my air of life**  
 **You have me sleeping in the same bed, every night**

 **Go rock with me, you deserve the best**  
 **Take a few shots**  
 **Let it burn in your chest**  
 **We could ride down**  
 **Pumping N.E.R.D. in the deck**  
 **Funny how a few words turn into sex**  
 **Play this free, joint called "brain"**  
 **(I just love your, Brain)**  
 **Ma, take a hint**  
 **Make me suerve in the lane**  
 **The name Malicious**  
 **And I burn every track**  
 **Clipse and J. Timberlake**  
 **Now how heavy is that?**

 **Maybe we'll fly the night away (I just wanna love you baby)**  
 **Yeah, yeah, yeah**  
 **Girl**  
 **Maybe we'll fly the night away(I just wanna love you baby)**  
 **Girl ...**

 **Ain't nobody love you like I love you**  
 **(Can't love you like I do)**  
 **You're a good girl and that's what makes me trust ya**  
 **(Trust ya like I do)**  
 **Late at night, I talk to you**  
 **(Hey)**  
 **You will know the difference when I**

 **Break this down**

 **You know, I used to dream about this when I was a**  
 **little boy**  
 **I never thought it would end up this way, Drums**  
 **(Hey)**  
 **It's kind of special right? yeah**  
 **You know, you think about it**  
 **Sometimes people just destined**  
 **Destined to do what they do**  
 **And that's what it is**  
 **Now everybody** dance

 **Amnesia**

 **5 Seconds Of Summer**

 **Lyrics**

 **I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted**  
 **I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted**  
 **And even though all your friends tell me you're doing fine**  
 **And you're somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you**  
 **When he says those words that hurt you do you read the ones I wrote you?**

 **Sometimes I start to wonder, was it just a lie?**  
 **If what we had was real, how could you be fine?**

 **'Cause I'm not fine at all**

 **I remember the day you told me you were leaving**  
 **I remember the makeup running down your face**  
 **And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them**  
 **Like every single wish we ever made**  
 **I wish that I could wake up with amnesia**  
 **And forget about the stupid little things**  
 **Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you**  
 **And the memories I never can escape**  
 **'Cause I'm not fine at all**

 **The pictures that you sent me they're still living in my phone**  
 **I admit I like to see them even when I feel alone**  
 **All my friends keep asking why I'm not around**  
 **It hurts to see you happy and it hurts that you moved on**  
 **It's hard to hear your name when I haven't seen you in so long**

 **It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?**  
 **If what we had was real, how could you be fine?**

 **'Cause I'm not fine at all**

 **I remember the day you told me you were leaving**  
 **I remember the makeup running down your face**  
 **And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them**  
 **Like every single wish we ever made**  
 **I wish that I could wake up with amnesia**  
 **And forget about the stupid little things**  
 **Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you**  
 **And the memories I never can escape**

 **If today I woke up with you right beside me**  
 **Like all of this was just some twisted dream**  
 **I'd hold you closer than I ever did before**  
 **And you'd never slip away**  
 **And you'd never hear me say**

 **I remember the day you told me you were leaving**  
 **I remember the makeup running down your face**  
 **And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them**  
 **Like every single wish we ever made**  
 **I wish that I could wake up with amnesia**  
 **And forget about the stupid little things**  
 **Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you**  
 **And the memories I never can escape**

 **I'm not fine at all**

Authors Note: Good bye for right now!


	44. Only one I've ever loved

Authors Note: I'm back...with more flashbacks! Also I have decided to do something else too until ny writers block goes away. SLIGHT SPOILER TO FUTURE CHAPTERS...

(Many months ago in September 1994.)

(Monica was having a hard time trying to fit into her jeans. The baby: her and Chandler's baby was really making her body change)

Monica: Ugh!

(Enter Rachel)

Rachel: Mon! How many times did I tell you to buy maternity clothes?

Monica: I know, I didn't have the time to.

Rachel: OK, I'm taking you to the store right now.

Monica: The baby is really making my body change in a way, I never knew.

Rachel: Ooh, I never got to experience pregnancy before. What is it like?

Monica: I love it. I'm so happy I've always wanted babies, and Chandler is the most perfect man I have ever met.

Rachel: I'm so happy for you!

Monica: I know! [They hug]

 _Authors Note: Remember how Chandler said his flock of seguals hairstyle was ticking a girls chin, in '82? Well you are about to see who's it is. But I changed it to '84._

[SCENE: Mondler were making out at the lockers before going to living environment class at 4th period]

(Monica giggled as she and Chandler were making out at the lockers)

CHANDLER: What's wrong Mon?

MONICA: Nothing. (Still gigling)

CHANDLER: I know, something's wrong when you laugh like crazy.

MONICA: OK, your flock of seguals hairstyle is ticking my chin.

CHANDLER: I love you, let's go to class now.

(They go to 4th period, still making out as they are walking)

(This is when they are in the hospital after Marcel got the scrabble tile removed, in ch.23)

CHANDLER: I can't wait until our little baby girl comes in two weeks.

MONICA: I know!

(He wrapped his arms around her waist, then rubbed her large belly as the baby starts to kick)

DR. MITCHELL: So Monica, how far along are you and what are you having?

MONICA: I'm 38 weeks pregnant: back aches, Braxton hicks, feeling overheated, kicks, and not being able to see my feet. Baby Girl is strong and my body is sure preparing for the delivery: which is why I went into false labor three times this month.

DR. MITCHELL: Oh you two are having a girl?

(Mondler nodded)

CHANDLER[Nibbled at her neck]: How about, we go back to the apartment and I rub your feet, then we do you know what?

MONICA:[Seductively] Oui.

ROSS: Oh, ew!

CHANDLER: Shut up Dino Man!

(1984. Flashback the night Mondler celebrated their one year anniversary)

[SCENE: Monica's bedroom at the Geller home]

(Monica was just about to go to sleep when Chandler started to kiss her)

CHANDLER: You are my love. My only love.

MONICA: You love me?!

CHANDLER: Of course Mon, I'm crazy about you.

[He started to undress her]

MONICA: I love you too Chandler.

[Chandler started to make love passionately to her that evening]

(It's March 1995. Monica is a few days overdue with Sophie)

MONICA: I'm so uncomfortable and big.

CHANDLER: Aww Baby.

[He kissed her but she pulled away]

MONICA: I'm not going to do it with you. Doing it with you got me into this.

AUTHORS NOTE: I lied, there's nothing extra. Goodbye for right now.


End file.
